Not sure actually HKKMR, I wouldn't stop any partner from eating stuff she likes.
What I used to do was plan for my ex, she'd tell me what she wanted to lose and i'd work out a diet "sonja bakker" style with what she'd eat when and what sports she would do. I wouldn't really monitor it, that was too much hassle, but it worked because she had set the goals herself. Not sure what your SEI really wants or needs though, my ex wasn't SEI so...
It really depends if someone asked for my help losing weight, I certainty would help but I wouldn't ask someone who loved food to lose weight, I love food myself too much.Originally Posted by Reficulris
But if I was living with someone who wanted to lose weight and had a hard time controlling themselves with food, I would simply make sure there wasn't any food that was bad around and this way you just have to live with what you got. This is how I live anyways.
i would say weight loss is very simple to understand (sort of) and often very difficult to carry out. simply, it is that one needs to be using more energy than they provided for themselves. whether one chooses to not change much about their diet but exercise more, or chooses to simply eat less, it is under-eating either way. my thought on this matter is that simply eating less food is the best thing to do at first, especially if there are problems with joints or other physical issues. then one can gradually add some exercise in as supposedly exercising helps keep the lost weight off, and it is of course beneficial in numerous ways. maintaining oneself at the lower weight will probably be a new challenge in itself (and perhaps the more difficult problem). using the BMR can help one determine how much less to eat: http://www.myfitnesspal.com/tools/bmr-calculator.
if she actually wants help, perhaps a thorough discussion on the matter would be helpful. this would be with the purpose of establishing what she wants, and why, and how important it is to her (or how important she wishes it were to her), and the particular challenges she faces in getting anywhere with it. i could see this being a good 3 hour long discussion at least. the point is to thoroughly delve into the entire matter to get a complete picture and getting things down in a way that isn't abstract or wishy-washy. taking notes during this is a good idea as well. what to do with the information would depend of course on what her particular challenges are. but knowing what they are would allow you to see areas where you could possibly help. if two people work on something like this together i think it's a lot more likely to progress, and often times there are ways in which one person can help another without it costing much to that person (win-wins).
if a plan could be worked out, it would need to be simple (because actions are simple), just what actions to take, or what things to change and in what ways. i always think that trying to meet personal goals like weight loss would be a lot more feasible if someone else did things with me, but i don't know if that would be helpful in this case or not. verbal commitments could also help because then you have to actually mean it and look at things in a way where you're confronted with the reality of what you said you would do and how this will be challenging... it just seems to connect deeper when something is made as a verbal commitment rather than as a wishy-washy, oh i know, maybe i really need to start steering myself more in this direction kind of thing... the former puts things in the realm where direct action is possible and more quickly, whereas the latter could maybe eventually propel one towards something but it's not a good way to meet a direct goal in a timely way.
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