Social inclusiveness - Delta or Fe?

[Park]

My problem is that I read this and think of too many possibilities. I mean for one it's possible that while you valued this opportunity to spend more one-on-one time with your friend, he perceived/experienced the situation differently and was looking for or valued different things in the situation. For example, if one of his interests was to meet new people or feel like he was "getting out more" or something during the trip, then his behavior would probably reflect that.

I don't know if it's strongly related to different group styles or not.

Yeah. I more or less understand his perspective situation-wise, partly because we talked about it. And even though talking about how I feel is as uncomfortable as it gets, I tend to have a counterphobic attitude towards being emotionally expressive with people I like and feel I can build trust with.

Interesting. So two different groups of Deltas could treat each others as ghosts if they don't know each other or don't know anyone that knows them?

I think they would be reserved and protective of information and stuff that's happening inside their respective group. They would be fair, honest and helpful in all other respects to everyone. However, inter-group communication would most likely tend to be guarded and businesslike, mostly as a sign of respect for everyone's privacy, autonomy, and personal space.

Or I could be projecting and talking about two different groups of Parks. You never know.

Its really hard for me to believe in Socionics. The reason I use quotes a lot is to display the meaning of, so when I say "ENFj", I mean the meaning of but not the reality of. And the ideas of quadras are very easy to me, but I actually dislike the idea of them in practice, because they really begin this turf war animalistic nature in us. That is so dividing to me. Bleh :[

It's not what it's supposed to be, but that's exactly what Socioncs boils down to - a belief system.

[anndelise]

I think they would be reserved and protective of information and stuff that's happening inside their respective group. They would be fair, honest and helpful in all other respects to everyone. However, inter-group communication would most likely tend to be guarded and businesslike, mostly as a sign of respect for everyone's privacy, autonomy, and personal space.

This description feels right to me.

I think the initial "feeling out a person" can seem from an outsider's perspective to be "guarded and businesslike". Until some kind of mutual connection is found, and that gets felt out to see how deep the connection might go, etc. Learning what is safe to talk about or do, and what to avoid.

Your story resonanted with some of my experiences.
But I also have to admit that I might have a desire to invite someone to join a 2 person group if the 3rd person seems lonely or isolated. For example, before Richard came into my life, and while my daughter was quite young, my brother and I would eat Thanksgiving dinner at a restaurant. We would often see older people eating their Thanksgiving dinner by themselves while looking around at the other families. In those cases, we would invite one to join us, or ask if they would like some company. But as my daughter got older, and Richard was now with us, the group was already too large (4) to really discuss anything everyone might enjoy discussing or hearing. Once a group reaches 4, I withdraw, becoming socally introverted.

In the story you described, I would likely have felt overwhelmed, even dizzy with all the talking and activity. In such cases I've tended to excuse myself and leave the group. Or, when Richard's there, we sit a bit off to ourselves and just listen in to other convers, and commenting just to each other.