Yes, sounds good to me. Come on, the guy even looks SLE.Originally Posted by JadaeRat
“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage.”
― Anais Nin
Thank-you for your candid reply Leger. I know it's not always easy (and in some cases wise) to share personal information online. I think it's in pretty safe company these days and I appreciate your honesty. I have highlighted words and phrases you have used that I believe reveals things about yourself. Keep in mind not every person would choose the same words as you have even if they had gone through similar circumstances and I believe word choice can often times reveal a persons attitudes towards people, places, memories, and events. It is well documented in psychological therapies that a person use of words can reveal a great deal about the perspectives of that person. For example, when asked how two middle aged women feel about thier mothers, both respond with similar answers, yet both use different words that may reveal either unconscious feelings towards their mothers, thoughts about themselves, or a core sense of identity, perhaps even a combination of all these factors.
The first women responds, "My mom is getting older and we can hardly care for her anymore like she would like, so I have decided to put her into a care home. She will be watched over by others who are more qualified then me and this is a huge burden removed from my shoulders. My Mother will be pleased with the care home, as it is a very costly facility. I think she won't be to unhappy there. We can visit each other whenever possible."
The second women, " My mom has aged and we need more assistance for her like she deserves, so I have decided to place her in a care home. She will be watched over by qualified people and given more care than I can provide which is a huge relief for me. My Mother will be pleased with the care home especially since it is a premium facility. I think she will be very happy there. We can visit each other as often as possible."
When working in therapy, counselors are looking for the feeling behind the content. All the bolded words are the hidden feelings that reveal attitudes, character, emotions, and history. Watch what happens when the previous statements have all the "feelings" removed.
My mom is a senior and I cannot care for her as she requires. I have decided to place her into a care home. She will be watched over by the care home workers. This will bring me a sense of relief. My mother might be happy there because the facility is costly (and thus the best). I think she will be happy there. We can visit.
Now, both women have said the same thing. It would be easy to make conclusions based solely on the information given such as the first women feels negatively towards her mother and the second positively. This might be the case and it may possibly not be the case as well. In terms of socionics we have to try and read between the lines of what a person is saying to try and find type. How does this person relate to the world? What are their desires? what are thier fears? What do they love about others? What do others love about them? And so on, so on forever actually, lol.
So when I read what you write, I am picking up on word choice, which is one clue about the underlining feeling. This reveals more to me then the actual content of your story.
differences in religious views,I enjoy doing is a deadly sinSounds like you were doing laundry in the background.
Yes.
Why do you not get along with your dad? Is it a long time thing, personality clash? Issues growing up?
We have differences in religious views. Due to his religious views just about everything I enjoy doing is a deadly sin(even though he does or has done just about all of those things). Also we had major problems until I was about 18. I won't go into it further, but ya, we had a lot of issues when I was young. As it stands now, we get along and I see him once every year or so. The huge gaps between visits helps keep conversations on a light track and it's easy to distract him from conversations in which a self-righteous lecture would form.
You work at a coffee shop? Is this what you want to be doing?
I no longer work at a coffee shop. I like working at coffee shops but it's not something one can make a living from, so no, I don't want to be a barista until I'm 50yo. If work is slow I'll pick up a second job(coffee shop, bar, etc). I'm a carpenter by trade and work is picking up. I have a semester of electives before I finish my associates degree, then I'll plant myself firmly into a sexy college and upgrade my degree to a BACH.
What do you want to be doing career wise?
A lot of things, which has always been my problem. I feel like I'm running out of time.
Where you ever in a long term relationship? How did you feel about her? What did you love about her? Why, do you think, it ended?
Yes, in one that I consider long-term. I felt comfortable with her. I loved her compassion and thoughtfulness, disliked her willful ignorance. It ended because she wanted to get married and have kids and I thought I was too young. She got married to and had kids shortly thereafter, then got a messy divorce.
Have you ever been in trouble with the law? In your videos you used derisive words to describe police, does your feelings come from a past encounter with them? What happened?
I dislike the police because of their immunity to responsibility. I'll get into more detail with this if necessary.
Why did you first look into socionics? What is interesting about this theory? Do you ever try to type people you meet IRL?
I took the MBTI im high school and have since been interested in typologies and other models(not just personality related).
Do you have friends that you have kept since childhood? How often do you visit them if you do?
Yes, and not often. I didn't like many of the people I knew from childhood. Most of the good ones moved far away, died or got married(kinda like dying).
What do you believe your sociotype to be?
I don't believe in sociotype, but I find myself spread out between several types(if we're talking about descriptions) and I don't see myself favoring functions, rather favoring one over another when I see it as necessary("situation dictates" blah blah) So far I doubt the value of typology in the way it's used on typology forums.
What do you think about me?
undecided.
huge gaps
distractself-righteous lecture
plant
A lot of things,
running out of time.
comfortable
married
messy divorce.
immunity to responsibility
good ones moved far away,
married(kinda like dying)
So out of these feelings I can just make some guesses about your attitudes that have helped shaped who you are today. 1. your Dad judges you. He doesn't approve of your life or the choices you have made. You judge him as well, perhaps in reaction to him and perhaps because of the way he treats your Mom. They may have possibly gotten divorced because you hold fairly disdainful feelings towards marriage that go beyond "I'm not ready for it". You may have experienced your parents divorce which to you felt like a kind of death and you do not wish to relive that pain yourself. Perhaps you feel that marriage might never be the thing for you which would be hard to reconcile because you actually do want to be planted somewhere firm. Perhaps relationship wise this firm ground you feel uneasy on. When it comes to how you will make a living this seems pretty clear to you, but you seem to be uneasy with the idea of settling here as well. You describe police having an immunity to responsibility, but I think that perhaps it is yourself that may think he has an immunity to responsibility, feelings that may have started with your own dad, who you have trouble respecting because his actions seem so hypocritical. This is in no way a condemnation, I have just learned that often times what we think about others is also what we think about ourselves. You unconsciously think about the distance and closeness of objects, people in relation to yourself. Words like gaps, moved far away, distract are examples of what I am talking about.
So you are a man who wants to be settled somewhere, but you don't know where yet and probably not in a relationship at this time. You have trouble with authority and have in the past and this may have started years ago with your own dad, who you feel doesn't understand you as the person you are and the choices you have made.
Personally man? I would say that despite all the blustering and window dressing that you put forward, I will say that at this time I do not envision you as being a true extroverted personality. As well, I suspect that Fi or Fe are valued information elements of yours. Valued as in not your ego block, buddy. I say OR because I think in some ways you are purposing to be unclear about your type. So whether you truly value the ethics of actions over the ethics of emotions remains to be seen......
So its kind of a toss up between SLE, or SLI imo, but I have yet to see real proof of Ti/ or Te so it's still a vague guess, sorry. I see a lot more questing about relationships and what not and that could be because most people are more interested in those sort of things anyway.
Last edited by wacey; 11-16-2013 at 07:15 PM.
Yes, I agree that word choice can reveal more than the sentences themselves. I choose my words carefully at times, such as the post you quoted. I could easily say that I spend most of my life hating my parents and believing that people who marry too young are fucking stupid, but I did not. I rephrased before it left my brain and travelled to my fingertips. In the case of police being immune to responsibilty, what I meant is that cops are rarely punished appropriately when one shoots someone's pet or child, tasers some college kid who refuses to be silenced or some father who's trying to run into his burning home to save his kid, sexually assaults a mother and daughter on the side of the road looking for drugs, etc, etc. I'm not even sure when we started talking about cops, but no, I'm not projecting in that particular statement. I've done things wrong in the past and probably doing something wrong now and will do terrible, terrible things in the future but I alone am responsible for those actions and have no issue owning them.
I'm fine with settling or wandering around, but I'd prefer to wander around for awhile. Marriage would be fine, but I wouldn't do it just to be married. My desired career may not even start until after I'm long dead, and I'm fine with that so far, at this moment in time.
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