Quote Originally Posted by Iris View Post
... The EII in my example above always has this perpetual big pile of clean laundry that she is trying to perfectly fold and find spots to bleach. The SEE teases her and says oh EII, do you want me to help you fold your laundry? Which we all know the pile would be done in about 5 minutes because the SEE doesn't mess around with stuff like that. The EII can laugh at herself for being so obsessive about it. But she wants to spend the time on it so she does. I think the way they talk to each other make the difference. They are always respectful and even teasing is always gentle. They have been friends for about 20 years. If they had to live together they would probably get on each other's nerves. But they frequently work together on projects and get along fine. They know which roles each fills best and they divide the work and don't bug each other. (I couldn't quite figure out how to quote you with your name after quoting dolphin in this post.)
Great story, Iris. This thread is very helpful. Nice friendship they have, and what you've shared is encouraging to me - because a friend I have made in the past recent years is my INTJ Supervisor. I admire her a lot. We met because we have our faith in common, but her past and ongoing accomplishments in life are a lot more stellar than mine (or most people's). When I realized she was my Supervisor, I got worried. Wondering if the ball was going to drop some day when she suddenly got completely exasperated by me. Yet we see none of that now. But like you say with the friendship you shared, its not a live-together thing.

In that friendship, is SEE more the leader, EII the helper? Because I have seen my INTJ friendship like that from the very beginning I see her as the leader. In fact, as I had not yet met the man I fell in love with so unexpectedly, and was determined to be open to if the Lord wanted me to stay single, I said to her (whose faith I really admired), who is widowed: "Maybe someday we'll start a religious order, and you can be our Mother Superior!" (This was before I knew of the Supervisor thing. But she knows where she is going in her life, has a plan, so she said probably not to that. And my life has a different direction now). She has many projects, and I want to help her with them. (my past two years have been full, but things should begine to let up). Like, I'd like to be receptionist at events she organizes, fielding phone calls and showing people what to do, or beforehand stuff envelopes for her, etc. I never think of her as helping me with projects. ...So I wonder whose projects this pair works on?