I'm sure if I have cash, and I want to have more cash than i have, i will consult you.
I'm sure if I have cash, and I want to have more cash than i have, i will consult you.
Option 3 is this:Originally Posted by Deestructor
[3]
It is essential for you to do what you want. Your work has to match your goals and ambitions. It is essential for you to make money and be continuously involved in something that is in line with your personal motivations and aspirations, something which brings you closer to your goals. You persist. You adapt.
Option Three for me!
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
1. -- and that's what I've chosen time and again. I look back on some of my choices and wonder about myself sometimes. If I hadn't been so intent on doing things that were the right fit for me, I could have been making a ton of money right now. Just one more year one place would have made a huge difference. But, when I decided that it was definitely not what I wanted to do - I left. Maybe I'm too good at quitting things that don't work for me, but I just don't care anything about money, and I can't care about it. I can take whatever kind of jobs just to get by when I need to, but ultimately I have to be moving towards something that has significance to me - some kind of meaningful goal.
The point of having money as I see it is to make your life better, so trading my life for money doesn't seem like such a good idea to me. I'm also not looking for some "ideal job" because it's not a job I want, it's the time to work on things and create something that matters to me. Ideally something that lasts and will have a positive impact on other people as well. If I can make an impact so that my ideas and what I create lasts after I'm gone, and continue to be of use and value for years to come - well, that's ultimately what I want.
1
http://youarenotsosmart.com/2011/12/...cation-effect/
Consider the story you tell yourself about why you do what you do for a living. How vulnerable is that tale to these effects?
Maybe your story goes like this: Work is just a means to an end. You go to work; you get paid. You exchange effort for survival tokens and the occasional steampunk thong from Etsy. Work is not fun. Work pays bills. Fun happens at places that are not work. Your story is in no danger if that’s how you see things. In an environment like that Skinner’s assumptions hold true, you will only work as hard as is necessary to keep getting paychecks. If offered greater rewards, you’ll work harder for them.
Maybe your story goes like this though: I love what I do. It changes lives. It makes the world a better place. I am slowly becoming a master in my field, and I get to choose how I solve problems. My bosses value my efforts, depend on me, and offer praise. In that scenario, rewards just get in the way of your job. As Kahneman’s and Deaton’s study about happiness showed, once you earn enough to be happy day-to-day, motivation must come from something else. As Kahneman and Deaton’s research into happiness and money showed, the only material reward worth seeking once you have a bed, running water and access to microwave popcorn, are tributes, symbols to all of your merit, stuff that demonstrates your effectance to yourself and others. Ranks, degrees, gold stars, trophies, Nobel Prizes and Academy Awards – these are shorthand indicators of your competence. Those rewards amplify your internal motivations; they build your self-esteem and strengthen your feelings of self-efficacy. They show you’ve leveled up in the real world. Achievement unlocked. They help you construct a personal narrative you enjoy telling.
The overjustification effect threatens your fragile narratives, especially if you haven’t figured out what to do with your life. You run the risk of seeing your behavior as motivated by profit instead of interest if you agree to get paid for something you would probably do for free. Conditioning will not only fail, it will pollute you. You run the risk of believing the reward, not your passion, was responsible for your effort, and in the future it will be a challenge to generate enthusiasm. It becomes more and more difficult to look back on your actions and describe them in terms of internal motivations. The thing you love can become drudgery if that which can’t be measured is transmuted into something you can plug into TurboTax.
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
Not to be a nag but I wonder what the implications of the overjustication effect are on sexuality and romance and how that meshes into the competition inherent in the "game".
That's pretty much ST vs NF mentality. NFs are goal setters and STs are goal meeters.
[]
| NP | 3[6w5]8 so/sp | Type thread | My typing of forum members | Johari (Strengths) | Nohari (Weaknesses)
You know what? You're an individual, and that makes people nervous. And it's gonna keep making people nervous for the rest of your life. - Ole Golly from Harriet, the spy.
I'm actually intrigued with how you worded this. You've expanded a simple concept of money & lifestyle vs passion & purpose, and made two arguments each with their own redeeming qualities.
I'm very much type 2. What I do doesn't matter as much as who I do it with, and how I can connect with and improve those individuals around me. You can find purpose in most things, but building a comfortable and stable lifestyle for you and your family is much harder when it's a second priority.
And if God cares so wonderfully for flowers that are here today and gone tomorrow, won't he more surely care for you?- Matthew 6:30
But didn't you just post another thread where you say you choose number 1) over 2) :S
Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit
I don't agree with this. I can set goals and meet them.
Dual type(as per tcaudilllg)
Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?
I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE
Best description of functions:
http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html
Did I? I mentioned I left a job that paid well but didn't provide enough social interaction, but that was because I got married. Up until then, I had stuck it out for two years.
Even now, I'm still doing something that earns a decent living. In reality though, I'm fortunate enough to not have to be the breadwinner. So I chose 2 in theory for this thread, assuming that I was making a decision as an individual.
Maybe this thread should add more context- "given no dependence on a significant other...", perhaps?
And if God cares so wonderfully for flowers that are here today and gone tomorrow, won't he more surely care for you?- Matthew 6:30
I think NFs tend to dream big and live in the future, but I know I certainly don't take all of my daydreams seriously. I'll say I'd like to do things more so for the beauty of the thought.
For those things that I do want to complete, it's a challenge if it requires persistance longer than a few weeks. I'll be 100% in execution for 3 weeks, and then derail (unless I'm held accountable by others on a team, or an ST).
And if God cares so wonderfully for flowers that are here today and gone tomorrow, won't he more surely care for you?- Matthew 6:30
Thank you for responding.
Interesting. I'm sure you can go on and on about that and I won't understand nor relate a bit. That being said, you sound like my polar opposite.
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
You felt you needed more social interaction when/after you got married? Or am I reading this the wrong way?
You're always making a decision as an individual. And to clarify myself, the subject matter of this thread isn't about making a (/one) decision, but about identifying your natural/intrinsic disposition and prevalent priorities that guide you in making the decisions related to your work and self-growth.
Nope. Being financially dependent shouldn't change your attitude towards the issue and your answer should stay consistent given that you understand the theoretical divide I am referring to. Again, apologies if it hasn't been expressed with enough clarity. People who had no problems grasping my point are welcome to assist you (and others) here.
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
Sorry, I flubbed my explanation.
I accepted the job because of the pay, even though I knew I'd hate it because of the isolation. I continued to work there for 2 years, and adapted to it, found ways to make it work for me. After 2 years, I got married. Once married, finances were then no longer a burden, so I left to find something with a better balance.
I then pursued something that paid decently well and allowed for better social interaction. That financial freedom has always been important to me.
EDIT:
Thank you for inquiring, listening, and clarifying
And if God cares so wonderfully for flowers that are here today and gone tomorrow, won't he more surely care for you?- Matthew 6:30
Makes sense. One would think the isolation won't be so much of an issue once you got married, though, but that's just me... and your husband... and introverts in general, I suppose.
Pleasure's all mine.EDIT:
Thank you for inquiring, listening, and clarifying
Last edited by Park; 06-23-2013 at 09:37 PM.
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
This is actually an assumption that catches people off guard. You might think, "if I get married, I'll never be alone again!" But that's not necessarily true, and having that expectation can be dangerous.
Example: I wanted to get married so I'd always have someone to be around and do things with outside. But I married an introvert that works with people all day, and prefers to be indoors. What does he want to do at the end of the day? Decompress and have alone time. We knew that would be a problem before we got married, but it doesn't make it any easier.
I would actually argue that I was less lonely when I was single. If I wanted attention, I would go out to a bar, or go dancing. That changes when you're married.
So in a strange way, you can still be married and feel isolated. It happens more often than you'd expect.
I still love him, and he keeps me structured and grounded. But as my good friend once said-
"You're going to marry someone crazy. Period. It's all about the kind of crazy you can handle!"
He's my favorite kind of crazy
And if God cares so wonderfully for flowers that are here today and gone tomorrow, won't he more surely care for you?- Matthew 6:30
And I assume you're talking about social events, group activities/gatherings, etc. and not one-on-one activities that exclude other people?
As long as he gives you the financial freedom you need? Perhaps not, though.He's my favorite kind of crazy
Last edited by Park; 06-23-2013 at 09:58 PM.
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
Both really, but maybe more so to have someone to do things with one-on-one. It just takes more effort with him, and doesn't come naturally at all. He'd rather play video games & watch movies, I'd rather go ride bikes outside. But we compromise and find middleground. (I'll sit next to him as he plays games. He'll come watch me compete in triathlons, etc).
As for the finances- that's nice to have, but not entirely necessary. I was the breadwinner up until marriage, and would have continued to be if he hadn't gone into dentistry. But what I meant by "crazy" was that he's a lone wolf kind of crazy. He's very non-vocal, requires extra time alone, and is very much not understood by many people. But those are things I'd rather handle than a many other things, such as someone who talks more than me or is somewhat identical, or someone who cheats or lies, or someone without similar morals/values/family goals.
Deep stuff here!
Something tells me you and I are exact opposite. But clearly, I find that refreshing
And if God cares so wonderfully for flowers that are here today and gone tomorrow, won't he more surely care for you?- Matthew 6:30
Funny how much your description of him sounds like me. I was tempted to suggest ESE/SLI earlier, but you're in no way an Si type and he doesn't look like an SLI. Sorry if my comment was offensive.
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
No offense at all!
The mystery continues!
And if God cares so wonderfully for flowers that are here today and gone tomorrow, won't he more surely care for you?- Matthew 6:30
Well, in socionics, NF ability is to forecast the flow of events and plan in the long term or to see the possibilities of the future development and bypass the immediate present into the long future. STs act in the here and now and immediate present because of their uncertainty and uncomfortableness of the unfolding events. STs need a lot of stability, predictability because of their weak Nis
Dual type
Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?
I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE
Best description of functions:
http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html
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