Maybe!
How how could you possibly know it was better that you "waited", when you don't have any experience on what it would've been like if you hadn't done se? .[/QUOTE] Waited to share any kind of intimacy until I was sure it was the kind of love I wanted to keep for always. Til I felt that SLI was God's will for my life.
As to the value of waiting, well, waiting to pick the fruit until it is fully ripened is valuable, for example. Waiting to enjoy the flower in full bloom and not pulling the tight bud open because you cannot wait to see. Waiting until hearts grow, and love is sure, until intimacy also has value.
As to waiting when you know you are in love and are completely sure you are going to marry and still waiting to have sex I couldn't tell you, I never followed that one through yet, and I am only trying now and cannot tell you the reward in that. Better is the end of a thing than the beginning thereof. Other than a clear conscience, a very wonderful freeing thing just in itself, I can only think of relief on that day when it finally arrives? We will see if it means even more.
As to how would I know, well, since husband was pretty much done with contact pretty much as soon as he wedding was over, and it was a long marriage, followed by a long period of being alone-on-purpose, that's why I know about waiting. But before my husband, I was a lot more willing to be affectionate even if I was not in love, just feeling loving. And I was with my husband completely before I married. Although Christian (Evangelical, then) I felt justified since I intended to marry him, and I couldn't find it in the Bible that you need a "piece of paper" if you were already "married in your heart", as I put it. Now I am Catholic and we do have a clear distinction. Its just not a marriage until the Priest marries you. And its hard since I am married in my heart to my SLI... and patience it not innate with me, its something I have to put on. But this too shall pass...
I just do. Probably because I feel the lovely wonder of it had a lot to do with the long dry spell before it. And my SLI also, thankfully, had the same long dry spell for the same sort of reason. We are both so sure of each other, too. It makes it so easy, so compelling.
I actually was afraid of that. I had this fear also that my determination to avoid that way of thinking would make me unable to think that way. Like I would turn myself into some kind of freak. I just had to trust God with that fear. And instead, to my surprise, it made it stronger, clearer, more compelling. I guess that's why I think it would work that way for others. Just sharing my experience.