Yea my initial reaction to the enneagram was an e8 self typing, but people I talked about this with in real life thought I fit e5 better because at the time (before I was active on this forum) they said I was more intellectual, isolated, and heady. I've always related to both types though and especially the integration/disintegration between e8 and e5.Originally Posted by Miso Soup
Yeah it was hard for me to distinguish between counterphobic 6 and type 8. I identify a lot with 8's and I think they can appear to almost be the same type even though you'd think they'd be very different.
DEAR GOD WHY DID YOU MAKE ME A SHY WIDDLE INTROVERT IN A WORLD THAT VALUES EXTROVERSION, DRIVING FAST AND MOVING QUICKLY. I TRY TO BE THAT WAY TO FIT IN BUT IT EXPENDS SO MUCH ENERGY. WHY AM I SO DRAINED. MOMMY PLEASE HELP ME GET EXTERNAL BALLS TO FACE THE WORLD AND ITS ALL ITS HEARTBREAKING NESS. I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE AHHHHH.
SAM remember our exercise
When you need to face the world, you can't try to just rise up and be macho. No matter how much you escalate yourself, the outside world will always escalate with you. When you want to change something, you have to look at it cold and sociopathically and just slip your knife into the world. Forget about buffing up and being macho and jumping into melee combat; you don't have the fuel to do that all the time, and its not necessary anyways. You have to save that feeling for moments of righteous combat and sacrificing yourself to save others. No, to face the outside Mitt Romney Illuminati nuclear weapons daily fascist numbness, you have to line yourself up, take one step, and plant your heel directly into Oprah's fat, squishy face. Don't stomp her out; just feel her nose and teeth crunch beneath your weight, and line up for the next step.
But, for a certainty, back then,
We loved so many, yet hated so much,
We hurt others and were hurt ourselves...
Yet even then, we ran like the wind,
Whilst our laughter echoed,
Under cerulean skies...
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