Helping Enneagram Type 6 with anxiety

[Miso Soup]

There isn't much constructive you can do with E6s to assuage their anxieties once they breach critical mass, except leave them alone, let them burn themselves out, and hope they come back intact to their senses.

Interesting. That actually reminds me of my behavior as an E5. I will work obsessively on finding a solution to whatever problem I'm interested in at whatever moment, and there's really nothing anyone can do to convince me not to, until I get tired, or realize that it doesn't matter or I'm not going to solve it any time soon.

It's almost like the same inner tension that exists inside us all is perceived or felt differently by each E type, and dealt with in accordingly different ways.

I hope that's not an accidental regurgitation of basic enneagram theory.

Do people find it amusing though? Or exhausting to deal with? I sometimes feel my dramatics annoy others and burn them out. I would personally think it's cute and funny to a certain extent.

I don't mind that she comes to me with her problems, though I find it frustrating when she ignores my advice. It's not that she doesn't take it. I understand she has the right to do as she pleases. But she doesn't even comment on it. I have no idea if I'm helping her or not.

To be honest, I usually prefer to just be left alone and try to figure things out on my own. For the most part, words of encouragement, exercising, meditation, etc. don't help me that much. Luckily, I think I'm pretty calm for the most part - I typically only start to feel a lot of anxiety when there is too much 'chaos' or 'instability' in my external world. But I continuously and frantically search for solutions until everything is stable again. It works.

I think she feels different about being left alone, because she'll usually mention to me that she's stressed, which leads me to believe she wants help. Who knows, maybe she just wants to talk about it. Hmm.

[jessica129]

Does enneagram have 'duals'? If so, what's a 6's dual? lol

[Raver]

Does enneagram have 'duals'? If so, what's a 6's dual? lol

Here's a good link that delves into this: http://www.similarminds.com/idealtypes.html

[DirectorAbbie]

Does enneagram have 'duals'? If so, what's a 6's dual? lol

It doesn't. But if it did, I'm pretty sure the 6s would be the ones left out. Data shows every type can be a 6. That might be true of the other E-types, but it isn't shown in the data (yet).

[Creepy-pokeball]

Does enneagram have 'duals'? If so, what's a 6's dual? lol

I made a chart on this, but Im not done completing it. However, with that said, certain patterns exist. 3vs9, 7vs5 & 8vs4, for example.

[Creepy-pokeball]

Does enneagram have 'duals'? If so, what's a 6's dual? lol

Okay, Im a little more awake. I'll clarify. Think of 4, 5, and 9 as polarized to 3, 7, 8. 3 and 9 are like exoskeletal vs. endoskeletal in terms of how they see the world. 5 and 7 are extremes in introversion and extroversion. 4 and are 8 are internal vs. external. Each of those sets are definitely not theoretical duals. 9 is different than 4 and 5 since 9 is neither a conforming or non-conforming type. Thus, it splits at its wings (9w8 and 9w1) into each conforming/non-conforming spectrum. Likewise, each relating type splits. 3w2 splits towards both 1s and 3w4 splits to both 5s. 6w5 splits to both 4s and 6w7 splits to both 8s. So 9w8 would verge with both 7s and 9w1 would verge with both 2s.

The previous idea was that each extreme was a "dual-type". However, none of these really covered for any weaknesses or aided in strengths. Enneagram is all about the triad of fears without our ancient brain (shame, anxiety, pain). Trying to address that head on, like each extreme appears to do, it not the solution. The solution is to break focus from it so that each type doesnt devolve into patterns of unhealthy behavior. So a "dual" in this theory set is more about was is the least likely to cause fear, day in and day out.