That made me think about it. In the past when I was attempting to meet people or date people, if anyone ever said the words 'I love you' to me, my instant reaction was 'You don't know me.' If I were with someone I loved, they would know that I loved them because I would start spending large amounts of time with them, asking them lots of questions, talking to them more and more often, and, if we were seeing each other in person (instead of for instance writing letters) then I would initiate physical touch. I am often (but not always) the one who initiates physical touch. I also help them by doing things for them like giving them a ride in the car if they don't have a car, for instance.
But an ideal relationship for me would be one where we actively avoided saying the words 'I love you,' which is uncomfortable for me for some reason. And it isn't because I think that I don't deserve love. I just don't say it. I'm becoming pretty sure that this is a Fe-PoLR, Fi-seeking kind of thing. In fact, it actually annoys me when people say 'I love you' to me. http://www.wikisocion.org/en/index.p...overted_ethics The Fi-mobilizing description there matches my own experience of wanting to have 'feelings that go unsaid.' (Note, my mother and I say 'I love you' to each other, but it's taken for granted as a family thing. I'm actually awkward saying it to my dad, who seems to be either SLI or ILI. But anyway I'm talking about dating, not family.)