ISTps and ESTjs expressing/showing their feelings

[InkStrider]

I see what you're saying, Ink, but even in such cases there's usually a slight leaning towards one choice or course of action that outweighs the other(s). It's the feeling that stays with you and resides within (even) when you stop thinking about your dilemma. I agree that it can be minute and hard to identify sometimes, but it's usually there.

Lol, you may be right. Problem is I suck ass at it. It is only by a stroke of luck that I hit the right note, so it feels like a gamble. Examine it too much, and you get yourself confused. I often act upon the wrong feeling because the original feels improbable/impossible/too good to be true or I just randomly pick and hope it's the right choice. But most likely some people are better at recognizing the right feeling, so it could possibly be a very effective tool if you are good at identifying it.

[Park]

Well, thinking back, some of the major mistakes I've made in my life have been due to not listening to my gut feeling, and giving in to someone else's expectations/demands (sometimes my own), or following the line of least resistance. Whenever I've complied to do something that felt wrong, no matter how logical or rational it seemed behind some fake rationale, it almost always has shown to be a mistake, usually biting me back.

[Reuben]

Clear instinct is the one that when you act upon, removes fear. Doubt is the one that when acted upon, creates fear. When you're moving in either, you will know.

[Beautiful sky]

LSE:

Laugh when they watch comedies
cry when they are sensitive, sentimental and emotional
excited when they like or love something
when I cry, he makes a pouty face and says to me, "don't cry, honey, I don't like to see you like this;" then hugs me and kisses me

SLI:

touchy when they get excited (a little dance-y)
walk away when people cry and often don't know what to do in that situation
not very good at showing affection
good relaxing companions
they get very sentimental and emotional when they see grandma in a bad situation and feel helpless
ignore hysterical reaction of others.

[Ver]

You mean he's on the rebound? You've met him only 3 times, which means it's not too long a time. Since I'm not sure about the details, I can't speak too much but I think that it's wise that you are exercising caution and not jump into things too quickly. My concern is that your LSE is still pining over his lost girlfriend, and is substituting her for you, playing it all over again in his mind, determined to do it 'right' this time round. It might be a little far-fetched, but what I am afraid of is him suddenly realizing that this is what he has been unconsciously doing, feel that it isn't fair for you, conscience setting in, and etc etc. It would be terrible if this happened after marriage, so yeah..

No no, I met him three times and then I fell in love with him. We've been dating for more than 4 months and we are a regular couple, we spend a lot of time together, we were on holiday and we met each other's parents. And I don't think he's pining over her, they split up 3 years ago so that's quite a lot of time and from what he says, although he doesn't mention her too much, she just behaved like a coward after 7 years of relationship. I think he didn't want to marry her because he was too young, he was 23 at that time and still a student, not financially independent. Now maybe the timing is better and he just wants to settle down.

[InkStrider]

No no, I met him three times and then I fell in love with him. We've been dating for more than 4 months and we are a regular couple, we spend a lot of time together, we were on holiday and we met each other's parents. And I don't think he's pining over her, they split up 3 years ago so that's quite a lot of time and from what he says, although he doesn't mention her too much, she just behaved like a coward after 7 years of relationship. I think he didn't want to marry her because he was too young, he was 23 at that time and still a student, not financially independent. Now maybe the timing is better and he just wants to settle down.

Lol, in that case Parkster is right. This is probably just normal anxiety on your part. Just relax and listen to your heart.

[Reuben]

You just answered the question yourself. Have a blessed marriage, Mrs LSE.

[Ver]

Thank you all for your support . You are right I'm very anxious and just need to deal with it first .

[Ver]

LSE:

Laugh when they watch comedies
cry when they are sensitive, sentimental and emotional
excited when they like or love something
when I cry, he makes a pouty face and says to me, "don't cry, honey, I don't like to see you like this;" then hugs me and kisses me

SLI:

touchy when they get excited (a little dance-y)
walk away when people cry and often don't know what to do in that situation
not very good at showing affection
good relaxing companions
they get very sentimental and emotional when they see grandma in a bad situation and feel helpless
ignore hysterical reaction of others.

I don't know why Martisa, but you remind me of ISFj I know... Are you sure your boyfriend isn't ENTj? My ISFj girlfriend's husband cries easily and can get excited

[Park]

Lol, in that case Parkster is right.

Parkster is always right. (Especially when it comes to his duals.)

Thank you all for your support . You are right I'm very anxious and just need to deal with it first .

Take it easy. I'm sure your boy will give you all the time and space you need.

[Beautiful sky]

I don't know why Martisa, but you remind me of ISFj I know... Are you sure your boyfriend isn't ENTj? My ISFj girlfriend's husband cries easily and can get excited

Well, comparing myself to my Se valuing ISFj cousin, I would say that unlike her, I am humanistic and less concerned about Sensory Perception; I look for ideas in what I read and see and I don't care much about objects, acquisition of them, because I don't buy and fill my home space with them. I can't stand clutter and I limit and strive for efficiency (using one object for more than one purpose) whenever possible. We both have strong faith in the God, but she's a lot more traditionalistic and rigid with who is fit or qualified to marry her kids based on what her tradition reflects; I am less judgmental, stereotypical, much more people loving, she's much more strictly religious. I believe that people who have faith in something other than themselves are less egocentric, are able to forgive others because they see things are not only about them.

[DirectorAbbie]

Laugh when they watch comedies

Of course!

cry when they are sensitive, sentimental and emotional

Maybe, if nobody's looking.

excited when they like or love something

Not often.

when I cry, he makes a pouty face and says to me, "don't cry, honey, I don't like to see you like this;" then hugs me and kisses me

Okay, you've trained him to do that. It's not natural.

[Reuben]

From what I know about abbie, she doesn't give a damn about my emotions. She's such a mean woman. When I cry, she tosses me a mop to dry the floor.

[Cyrano]

Lol, in that case Parkster is right. This is probably just normal anxiety on your part. Just relax and listen to your heart.

Parkster is usually very intuitive about these things.

[Slacker]

If he's talking about marriage, he's seriously thinking about marriage, and he's serious about you. It doesn't matter how long you've been together - my husband and I weren't together long when we got married, my parents only met a few weeks before they got married and they've been married 45 years now. There's no set standard for how long you have to be together before you get married or want to get married. UNLESS you haven't had sex yet, in which case he could talk about marriage just to get you into bed.

[Ver]

We had sex so I assume that's not the case. Anyway, I've started thinking if he's not ISTp or maybe I'm INFj. This relationship doesn't resemble activity, maybe it's because of the subtypes. How long were you with your husband before you got married?

[Park]

Parkster is usually very intuitive about these things.

Thank you, Cyrano! I was under the impression that you've abandoned this place, so I'm glad to see you around. Do post more, sir.

[Beautiful sky]

From what I know about abbie, she doesn't give a damn about my emotions. She's such a mean woman. When I cry, she tosses me a mop to dry the floor.

LOLOL

I love Abbie