Fi PoLR - Misunderstood

[mightylizard]

I believe this to an extent, only because I've seen people I knew were Fi PoLR assertively tell someone not to do something to them like they had a major problem with it. But maybe it's only apparent when the thing comes up(?).

Like if someone was posturing like they were gonna punch you in the face, would you not tell them "Don't punch me.", if you couldn't easily move out the way? That doesn't come from some rule that says "I don't want to be punched by someone." that you personall hold.

Fi-POLR have personal feelings, but they repress them, because they do not understand them. I guess I have just done it in my post: just as Ti-POLR have their own opinions of things Fi-POLR have the way that they feel about things, but they pretend that they don't. Fi-POLR does not like the fact that it has those "feelings" as it directly conflicts with their creative, Ti, which says, "your feelings are arbitrary and transient; however, the truth is absolute."

Every person has every "function" per say; however, you do not understand your POLR and you repress and reject it.

In the same vein, healthy Fi-POLR will genuinely "fully" reject Fi in a sense. This, in a sense, is symbolically psychological self-mutilation in order to embodied your "philosophy" to its ultimate truth. Fi-POLR genuinely believes that Fi should be suppressed, and so healthy Fi-POLR does this to themselves, despite the pain, because they want to embody their philosophy and prove that it can work. I genuinely believe this is the self-actualization of each type: to fully reject the POLR and to fully embrace your ego functions, in spite of the aspects of society that use your weak functions saying otherwise.

Undeveloped people of any type will use their POLR function in an uncontrolled way (e.g., a self-righteous ILE/SLE who condemns everyone as immoral or a IEE/SEE who calls everybody they meet stupid and naive) and then will simultaneously claim that the function (Fi/Ti) itself is useless and serves zero purpose and that they are "above it". True self-actualization is genuine self-awareness: me, and ILE, has Fi - I have personal preferences, and I do like hanging out with some people more than others - however, in order to self-actualize I will reject this aspect of myself, and fully embrace what I perceive to be the truth, and I will take with it all of the inevitable criticism (e.g., I am an asshole) in order to fully contribute in the way that I am meant to. To fully embrace your strength (your ego functions), you must face the wrath of the aspects of society that conflict with them (for me, Fi in particular). This is true bravery, as you accept your truth, fully, in spite of the rejection, pain, and criticism.

[sbbds]

Undeveloped people of any type will use their POLR function in an uncontrolled way (e.g., a self-righteous ILE/SLE who condemns everyone as immoral or a IEE/SEE who calls everybody they meet stupid and naive) and then will simultaneously claim that the function (Fi/Ti) itself is useless and serves zero purpose and that they are "above it". True self-actualization is genuine self-awareness: me, and ILE, has Fi - I have personal preferences, and I do like hanging out with some people more than others - however, in order to self-actualize I will reject this aspect of myself, and fully embrace what I perceive to be the truth, and I will take with it all of the inevitable criticism (e.g., I am an asshole) in order to fully contribute in the way that I am meant to. To fully embrace your strength (your ego functions), you must face the wrath of the aspects of society that conflict with them (for me, Fi in particular). This is true bravery, as you accept your truth, fully, in spite of the rejection, pain, and criticism.

Wouldn’t true healthiness and maturity be a third option of accepting that one’s PoLR is actually useful in many cases as it’s valued by many people in society? I understand the utility of braving through society’s values in favor of one’s own truth and values, but to take it to an extreme without trying to develop some awareness of how it works and why others might value it seems like rejecting inconvenient/uncomfortable realities to me.

Rejecting aspects of one’s self definitely doesn’t sound healthy or transcendental in any case. Development is about wholesomeness and integration. PoLR is painful and it’s supposed to be that way. You don’t just chug Tylenol day after day to get rid of periodic aches. Having to continually deal with difficulty and solve problems that come up, and accepting that’s going to be the case, is a part of life and growing.

I just don’t think trapping oneself in a wormhole of solipsistic truth is the path to self-actualization.

[mightylizard]

Wouldn’t true healthiness and maturity be a third option of accepting that one’s PoLR is actually useful in many cases as it’s valued by many people in society? I understand the utility of braving through society’s values in favor of one’s own truth and values, but to take it to an extreme without trying to develop some awareness of how it works and why others might value it seems like rejecting inconvenient/uncomfortable realities to me.

Rejecting aspects of one’s self definitely doesn’t sound healthy or transcendental in any case. Development is about wholesomeness and integration. PoLR is painful and it’s supposed to be that way. You don’t just chug Tylenol day after day to get rid of periodic aches. Having to continually deal with difficulty and solve problems that come up, and accepting that’s going to be the case, is a part of life and growing.

I just don’t think trapping oneself in a wormhole of solipsistic truth is the path to self-actualization.

You're misunderstanding my point. I do not reject Fi as a function - I respect it and in a sense I am jealous of people who excel at it. That said, that is not my strength, and I will probably ultimately contribute to the world in a much deeper way if I fully accept that I am very strong at Ti, and rather weak at Fi. Anyone who fully embraces themselves is met with thrown rocks by society (most likely people from conflicting Quadras). "Pushing through" the thrown rocks and not wavering in embracing your strengths and who you are as a person is not synonymous with rejecting all aspects of what you are not strong at. Anyone who is "healthy" and "self-actualized" will embrace others strengths as well as embrace their own weaknesses.

Also, IMO, accepting who I am in my wholeness is less like "chugging Tylenol" than neurotically attempting to improve my Fi and failing time and time again but not admitting to myself that maybe I am eschewing my own strengths to try and become something that I am not - which I did try in my late teens/early twenties and only resulted in me drinking a lot and depression (I am not talking about Fi here as a function - I was naive to Socionics - but I neurotically obsessed about my relations with other person, how I seemed to be "missing something" in social situations, and how I could never seem to get a completely solid footing in that sphere. It became my obsession, and where I derived all sense of value. It was, in a sense, a mistake, as I was ignoring the fact that I was doing amazing in school, in spite of putting very little effort in, and I understood material very quickly. Later, around 22-23, I became TOO focused on "Ti" and thought of "Fi" as weak, or inferior. I would like to think that at this point in my life I am much more balanced - I embrace my strengths and weaknesses, and I accept the strengths of others and do not punish them for their weaknesses.

People who are not healthy will punish people for being comfortable with themselves. Anyone who is comfortable with themself almost inevitably will face unhealthy people who attempt to bring them down. That is my point about society throwing rocks, per say - the more you embrace your strengths, and the more that you utilize them, the more UNHEALTHY people will target you. That just seems inevitable to me. Maybe people perceive me as cocky, and maybe I am, but I am very aware of my own faults and I do not reject them - I sit comfortably with them. And just because I sit comfortably with them does not mean I do not try to improve them.


I accept that I am weak at Fi; however, I value Fi. Do I try and improve Fi? I am not sure. I am constantly trying to improve how I interact with people, and I am constantly evaluating my actions and trying to become a better person. I do not believe being strong at Ti makes me superior to a Fi user, but it simply means that I have different strengths, and I push my view forward when I think that Ti is appropriate. When Fi is appropriate I let Fi take charges, unless I really have something to say. Sometimes my Ti clashes with someone's Fi, and I am maligned names, which genuinely hurt me, but if I have genuinely thought something true, and I genuinely believe something, I try and stick to my guns. I do not think that I do this obnoxiously (at least, I try not to), and sometimes I don't reveal my opinion if it is not useful in real life, but lots of people have called me lots of things, especially in regard to my Fi-POLR. I listen - sometimes they are right, sometimes I do not think that what they are saying is fair, and is just them attempting to run a smear campaign of sorts. It is not self-actualized to neurotically question things over and over when your strengths intimidate someone, no matter what your strength is


Anyways, this is just me going on and on about nothing

[grumpyvic81]

Also, IMO, accepting who I am in my wholeness is less like "chugging Tylenol" than neurotically attempting to improve my Fi and failing time and time again but not admitting to myself that maybe I am eschewing my own strengths to try and become something that I am not - which I did try in my late teens/early twenties and only resulted in me drinking a lot and depression (I am not talking about Fi here as a function - I was naive to Socionics - but I neurotically obsessed about my relations with other person, how I seemed to be "missing something" in social situations, and how I could never seem to get a completely solid footing in that sphere. It became my obsession, and where I derived all sense of value. It was, in a sense, a mistake, as I was ignoring the fact that I was doing amazing in school, in spite of putting very little effort in, and I understood material very quickly. Later, around 22-23, I became TOO focused on "Ti" and thought of "Fi" as weak, or inferior. I would like to think that at this point in my life I am much more balanced - I embrace my strengths and weaknesses, and I accept the strengths of others and do not punish them for their weaknesses.

god lol so relatable

People who are not healthy will punish people for being comfortable with themselves. Anyone who is comfortable with themself almost inevitably will face unhealthy people who attempt to bring them down. That is my point about society throwing rocks, per say - the more you embrace your strengths, and the more that you utilize them, the more UNHEALTHY people will target you. That just seems inevitable to me. Maybe people perceive me as cocky, and maybe I am, but I am very aware of my own faults and I do not reject them - I sit comfortably with them. And just because I sit comfortably with them does not mean I do not try to improve them.

Fuck yeah.

I accept that I am weak at Fi; however, I value Fi. Do I try and improve Fi? I am not sure. I am constantly trying to improve how I interact with people, and I am constantly evaluating my actions and trying to become a better person. I do not believe being strong at Ti makes me superior to a Fi user, but it simply means that I have different strengths, and I push my view forward when I think that Ti is appropriate. When Fi is appropriate I let Fi take charges, unless I really have something to say. Sometimes my Ti clashes with someone's Fi, and I am maligned names, which genuinely hurt me, but if I have genuinely thought something true, and I genuinely believe something, I try and stick to my guns. I do not think that I do this obnoxiously (at least, I try not to), and sometimes I don't reveal my opinion if it is not useful in real life, but lots of people have called me lots of things, especially in regard to my Fi-POLR. I listen - sometimes they are right, sometimes I do not think that what they are saying is fair, and is just them attempting to run a smear campaign of sorts. It is not self-actualized to neurotically question things over and over when your strengths intimidate someone, no matter what your strength is

Completely agree. Your last sentence, yeah, a very good summary

In fact and maybe this is obvious to you already, if you embrace your strengths instead of questioning them when someone gets intimidated by the stuff, you will actually have the other person respect you more

Ofc the really unhealthy people can't take it anyway either way

[sbbds]

You're misunderstanding my point. I do not reject Fi as a function - I respect it and in a sense I am jealous of people who excel at it. That said, that is not my strength, and I will probably ultimately contribute to the world in a much deeper way if I fully accept that I am very strong at Ti, and rather weak at Fi. Anyone who fully embraces themselves is met with thrown rocks by society (most likely people from conflicting Quadras). "Pushing through" the thrown rocks and not wavering in embracing your strengths and who you are as a person is not synonymous with rejecting all aspects of what you are not strong at. Anyone who is "healthy" and "self-actualized" will embrace others strengths as well as embrace their own weaknesses.

Also, IMO, accepting who I am in my wholeness is less like "chugging Tylenol" than neurotically attempting to improve my Fi and failing time and time again but not admitting to myself that maybe I am eschewing my own strengths to try and become something that I am not - which I did try in my late teens/early twenties and only resulted in me drinking a lot and depression (I am not talking about Fi here as a function - I was naive to Socionics - but I neurotically obsessed about my relations with other person, how I seemed to be "missing something" in social situations, and how I could never seem to get a completely solid footing in that sphere. It became my obsession, and where I derived all sense of value. It was, in a sense, a mistake, as I was ignoring the fact that I was doing amazing in school, in spite of putting very little effort in, and I understood material very quickly. Later, around 22-23, I became TOO focused on "Ti" and thought of "Fi" as weak, or inferior. I would like to think that at this point in my life I am much more balanced - I embrace my strengths and weaknesses, and I accept the strengths of others and do not punish them for their weaknesses.

People who are not healthy will punish people for being comfortable with themselves. Anyone who is comfortable with themself almost inevitably will face unhealthy people who attempt to bring them down. That is my point about society throwing rocks, per say - the more you embrace your strengths, and the more that you utilize them, the more UNHEALTHY people will target you. That just seems inevitable to me. Maybe people perceive me as cocky, and maybe I am, but I am very aware of my own faults and I do not reject them - I sit comfortably with them. And just because I sit comfortably with them does not mean I do not try to improve them.


I accept that I am weak at Fi; however, I value Fi. Do I try and improve Fi? I am not sure. I am constantly trying to improve how I interact with people, and I am constantly evaluating my actions and trying to become a better person. I do not believe being strong at Ti makes me superior to a Fi user, but it simply means that I have different strengths, and I push my view forward when I think that Ti is appropriate. When Fi is appropriate I let Fi take charges, unless I really have something to say. Sometimes my Ti clashes with someone's Fi, and I am maligned names, which genuinely hurt me, but if I have genuinely thought something true, and I genuinely believe something, I try and stick to my guns. I do not think that I do this obnoxiously (at least, I try not to), and sometimes I don't reveal my opinion if it is not useful in real life, but lots of people have called me lots of things, especially in regard to my Fi-POLR. I listen - sometimes they are right, sometimes I do not think that what they are saying is fair, and is just them attempting to run a smear campaign of sorts. It is not self-actualized to neurotically question things over and over when your strengths intimidate someone, no matter what your strength is


Anyways, this is just me going on and on about nothing

Finally read your post. Sure, I agree with you now—about the underlined, I see it the same way—as long as you’re doing the bolded.

Just wondering though— what made you change your typing from SLE to ILE recently? I feel like I can relate a lot to your train of thinking and form of expression.

[mightylizard]

Finally read your post. Sure, I agree with you now—about the underlined, I see it the same way—as long as you’re doing the bolded.

Just wondering though— what made you change your typing from SLE to ILE recently? I feel like I can relate a lot to your train of thinking and form of expression.

Yes, I agree, I relate to a lot of what you say as well.

I MAYYYY be an SLE; however, I chalk a lot of my "Se-ness" to me being Sx? I think that Ne is my true "being" per say, particularly when I look back on my childhood. That said, I really love Se, and I really really love beta Quadra, who I feel I connect with more than Alpha is some ways. I have not ruled out SLE; however, I am very oblivious to sensory aspects of life, and I think that I have only become decent at them by focusing so hard on them as I grew up. I also remember as a child constantly living in a fantasy land and being very physically oblivious to things. That said, my entire family is Alpha, so perhaps I only consider myself Apha because of this?

I have definitely narrowed my typing down to Ti-creative/Fi-POLR; however, I do fluctuate between SLE and ILE. That said, I relate so much to Ne-Ego descriptions, particularly the Alpha NT brand of Ne, that I feel as though I am just an ILE who focuses fairly heavily on Se.

I also fluctuate on my instinctual variant, and I reasonably could be So/Sx, which I have originally typed as, but I feel as though So-blind actually makes more sense, as I pay almost zero attention to the "social" realm per say and focus almost entirely on the individuals within that social realm (I thought this was originally was I was so/sx - I am definitely synflow). I also MAY be a 7. I have typed as 6 too, but never felt comfortable with that as I never really related to any description.


This is all over the place, but it is what it is

Yes, I could 100% be SLE. Alas! At least I am 100% certain that I am terrible with Fi - good to know, lol

Why do you think that I am SLE?

[sbbds]

Yes, I agree, I relate to a lot of what you say as well.

I MAYYYY be an SLE; however, I chalk a lot of my "Se-ness" to me being Sx? I think that Ne is my true "being" per say, particularly when I look back on my childhood. That said, I really love Se, and I really really love beta Quadra, who I feel I connect with more than Alpha is some ways. I have not ruled out SLE; however, I am very oblivious to sensory aspects of life, and I think that I have only become decent at them by focusing so hard on them as I grew up. I also remember as a child constantly living in a fantasy land and being very physically oblivious to things. That said, my entire family is Alpha, so perhaps I only consider myself Apha because of this?

I have definitely narrowed my typing down to Ti-creative/Fi-POLR; however, I do fluctuate between SLE and ILE. That said, I relate so much to Ne-Ego descriptions, particularly the Alpha NT brand of Ne, that I feel as though I am just an ILE who focuses fairly heavily on Se.

I also fluctuate on my instinctual variant, and I reasonably could be So/Sx, which I have originally typed as, but I feel as though So-blind actually makes more sense, as I pay almost zero attention to the "social" realm per say and focus almost entirely on the individuals within that social realm (I thought this was originally was I was so/sx - I am definitely synflow). I also MAY be a 7. I have typed as 6 too, but never felt comfortable with that as I never really related to any description.


This is all over the place, but it is what it is

Yes, I could 100% be SLE. Alas! At least I am 100% certain that I am terrible with Fi - good to know, lol

Why do you think that I am SLE?

I relate to a lot of that too. I’m not necessarily that physically grounded in some ways and have had to work at sensoric things.

Your thinking style just reminds me more of that of SLEs I’ve known than ILEs. Your thinking style reminds me of Holographic-Panoramic (which can be a little meandering and can be mistaken for Ne) more than Casual-Deterministic IMO (which can seem IJ-like), more specifically.