Base function vs. Polr function

[Mallan]

First thread since my introduction! This is scary, but I like seeing discussion. o.o

So I've been thinking lately about my direction in life and where I want it to head. However, the problem with this is that I turn myself into this anxious sloth and convince myself that what I want to kickstart is actually just too much work. There's a heavy reliance which holds me back. I think this has to do with resorting to my first function, Si, which is the foundation of how my important decisions and thoughts are formed. My conundrum is particular people basically insulting the way my mindset is, and what values I hold dear. My base is under attack, so to say. It's also when particular people embarrass me and uses my Fe polr against me, this can hurt me hard where I have to wonder if the things I value even matter anymore, because it feels as though I'm living an incorrect life. Does that make sense?

So I guess I'm wondering... which function hurts more and why? Base function under attack or Place of Least Resistance broadcast all over? Is it a mesh of both? I'd love to see examples from different perspectives. ^_^

[Sol]

My conundrum is particular people basically insulting the way my mindset is, and what values I hold dear. My base is under attack, so to say. It's also when particular people embarrass me and uses my Fe polr against me, this can hurt me hard where I have to wonder if the things I value even matter anymore, because it feels as though I'm living an incorrect life. Does that make sense?

Communicate more with people which are easier for you and care lesser about what other people like and value.

> which function hurts more and why?

weak. because you are lesser sure there and may control worse

though, your type mb other than you think

[Adam Strange]

@Sol, @Mallan is an SLI. I’ve known a lot of them for more years than you’ve been alive, and she is expressing the exact concerns which all the SLI’s whom I know feel. Only SLI’s express these particular concerns, and only to people they trust.

Having said that, Mallan, I think Sol is right. You are more vulnerable to attacks on your PoLR function.

You can find a situation in life which supports and appreciates your Si skills (and that should be your goal), but you will always struggle with your Fe doubts, even when you find a person who is openly and consistently appreciative (Fe) of you.

In my experience, your duals are best at doing that. They may seem to be completely scattered and flakey, but they are your medicine. Accept nothing less.

Make sure you get the correct subtype, since this makes a huge difference in your duality. If you are SLI-Te, find an IEE-Fi. I’m not kidding.

[consentingadult]

A thing that is often overlooked by people thinking about the PoLR, is that usually it involves using your Mobilizing function. So if people are hitting your PoLR, it is usually because they are offended by your use of your Mobilizing function.

From what you are saying, it is highly likely that you are surrounded by incompatible people (usually Betas), or let yourself be surrounded by such people as a sort of neurotic or pathological pattern. To overcome this, you need first to learn to distance yourself from people who make you feel bad (note that these people are not bad people per se, they are most likely just incompatible with you). This instead of you trying to adapt to them. Once you have learned to keep he wrong people at a distance, you will almost automatically start to learn to identify people who are good for you, people you now tend to overlook because you find them uninteresting or boring, but that is because they do not trigger your sensibilities. The biggest problem is: how to get from A to B. As a Sufi saying goes: "Does thou think thou can enter the Garden of Bliss without the trials of those who went before you?"

Perhaps this blog post can help you get started:

http://mavericksocionics.blogspot.co...t-you-are.html

Perhaps after that browse around my blog for more insights on the Mobilizing function and how it related to the PoLR.

As to the Base function: it is very unlikely that one can be insulted over your Base. Even when met with resistance, the usual attitude is that one of 'couldn't care less', very much why people also aren't flattered when they are complimented on their use of their Base function.

[Exodus]

First thread since my introduction! This is scary, but I like seeing discussion. o.o

So I've been thinking lately about my direction in life and where I want it to head. However, the problem with this is that I turn myself into this anxious sloth and convince myself that what I want to kickstart is actually just too much work. There's a heavy reliance which holds me back. I think this has to do with resorting to my first function, Si, which is the foundation of how my important decisions and thoughts are formed. My conundrum is particular people basically insulting the way my mindset is, and what values I hold dear. My base is under attack, so to say. It's also when particular people embarrass me and uses my Fe polr against me, this can hurt me hard where I have to wonder if the things I value even matter anymore, because it feels as though I'm living an incorrect life. Does that make sense?

So I guess I'm wondering... which function hurts more and why? Base function under attack or Place of Least Resistance broadcast all over? Is it a mesh of both? I'd love to see examples from different perspectives. ^_^

I don't see this as "your base being under attack". When people criticize how well we accomplish the goal of the leading function, usually we have a response ready for them because we've already thought it through thoroughly.

You mentioned this in the context of your direction in life, which suggests that it might be your (neglect of) Ni which is actually being attacked. (Not that I know whether you're actually SLI or not, this is just how I read it.)

I'm also not quite sure what you're talking about with regards to Fe, there's not enough information.

[Rebelondeck]

SLIs often erect barriers and look for the enemy; unfortunately the barriers can sometimes become so high that no one can see in or out. They can be so defensive that they don't venture outside their own end-zone but this isn't usually a sign of fear or incapability - just enter their end-zones and see. SLIs seem to always wonder if they're prepared enough, which can create self-imposed barriers to progress - and a single information element cannot be blamed for it. I think it requires confidence in one's own abilities to be able to adapt and cope should a problem arise; many young SLIs don't realize that they're one of the best types to fly by the seat of their pants.

a.k.a. I/O

[Adam Strange]

SLIs often erect barriers and look for the enemy; unfortunately the barriers can sometimes become so high that no one can see in or out. They can be so defensive that they don't venture outside their own end-zone but this isn't usually a sign of fear or incapability - just enter their end-zones and see. SLIs seem to always wonder if they're prepared enough, which can create self-imposed barriers to progress - and a single information element cannot be blamed for it. I think it requires confidence in one's own abilities to be able to adapt and cope should a problem arise; many young SLIs don't realize that they're one of the best types to fly by the seat of their pants.

a.k.a. I/O

I agree with everything you said, @Rebelondeck, except the last statement about SLI's being good at flying by the seat of their pants.

I think what you are actually seeing is an SLI appearing to be competent in new (to them) areas because they have previously done a lot of preparation in related areas, and they are willing to go forward at some point and accept their performance as "good enough".

I'm not sure, but I think this relates to Te somehow, since I do this, too.

If you are intimately familiar with flying, you may see that they broke the landing gear on touch down, but if you aren't, you might say that they successfully got the plane up in the air and back again.

[Sol]

Mallan is an SLI. I’ve known a lot of them for more years than you’ve been alive

Your age changes nothing in my low trusting to typings of others. Especially when you did not see video/IRL of the one.

> and she is expressing the exact concerns which all the SLI’s whom I know feel

To doubt in the need of own ego functions is not common for any type. During the normal emotional states, at least.

> Make sure you get the correct subtype, since this makes a huge difference in your duality.

there is no subtypes in Socionics. no theory with reasonable basis and how to use them on practice. there are a lot of traits which influence on relations besides obscurity subtypes hypotheses
mistyping is what makes the most "huge difference"

> If you are SLI-Te, find an IEE-Fi.

If you have stronger some function - it's better to have stronger the suplementing one. But this difference is not much, mb not stable and not significantly important for the quality of relations, compared to other traits and behavior.

[Rebelondeck]

.........they are willing to go forward at some point and accept their performance as "good enough".......

I agree with this phrase; however, I relate this to closed-loop thinking which LIEs do have. I've noted that SLIs seem better at rolling with the punches whereas LIEs are better at getting others to deliver them. I also find that SLIs are more attuned to what's actually going on around them but they can't seem to predict what'll happen beyond the horizon. If both types have acquired an actual physical target, my money's on the SLI given they've equal resources. For winning a war, I'd bet on the LIE.

a.k.a. I/O