IEIs-INFps: what do you want?

[Leader]

No menage a trois. Im in college, on two different occasions, two different classes, two different girls. I messed up as in, I guess I didn't have the courage to talk to them fast enough or at all. Its not like I was scared, it was like they were calling out to me, waiting but I just didn't want to go because I was uncertain. I suppose if they were male, I would feel the same way, just not as intense. The first one, much later on in class I just decided to say something, it was one of those stupid rude jokes I do and she was walking away and smiled. I was too happy, but I think she tried to get my attention after that and I just acted like I didn't care, the same happened with the other girl. I act like they're not there because I don't know what to do and I don't want to fuck up. How I made the same mistake twice in a row baffles me.

[IEI]

No menage a trois. Im in college, on two different occasions, two different classes, two different girls. I messed up as in, I guess I didn't have the courage to talk to them fast enough or at all. Its not like I was scared, it was like they were calling out to me, waiting but I just didn't want to go because I was uncertain. I suppose if they were male, I would feel the same way, just not as intense. The first one, much later on in class I just decided to say something, it was one of those stupid rude jokes I do and she was walking away and smiled. I was too happy, but I think she tried to get my attention after that and I just acted like I didn't care, the same happened with the other girl. I act like they're not there because I don't know what to do and I don't want to fuck up. How I made the same mistake twice in a row baffles me.

ahhhh the ignore them and they will go away strategy

[Hot Scalding Gayser]

if you like an IEI, keep talking to them until they are comfortable, and make sure they know that you will protect them and they will be kept safe.

As crazedrat and myself point out, we don't like conflict (isfp lookalike) or somebody acting like 'they are all that', that is more of what an ESTj would do. I AM A NARCISSISTIC JEWISH DIRECTOR WITH A MEGAPHONE!!! IEIs just retreat from that shit. We are humanitarians, like INFjs are, and like to feel we are with somebody together.

Do not be too intellectual with us either. We hate that shit, because we are sooo fucking smart ourselves, and we won't fall for intellectual mindgames or somebody preaching us shit that we already know. Basically just exude physical and stable self-confidence. We are looking for one special thing to hold on to (romantic, Se dual-seeking), not for somebody to 'Push us.'

And we love to argue too honestly, as we know that every platitude somebody says depends on their physical environment. So while it's often true that you can only help yourself in life, that actually isn't true all the time. It depends on the circumstance. It in essence, depends on the Se.

[Reuben]

@Agee

Do you really need someone to love or are you projecting the need to love yourself on someone else?

Agee, you are clearly too mean to yourself. It is difficult to get good chicks with this kind of mindset and attitude. Firstly, if you can't love yourself, how the hell are you going to love another person? It's like you're loving on credit; you don't even have enough love in your bank to give it out. Eventually the need to repay the love loans you keep taking out from yourself will need to be paid up, and you'll demand it from whatever chick you're with. They'll be freaked out by your neediness and leave you. Hence, don't love others if you don't have the love for yourself to actually support it.

Secondly, you DON'T NEED IEIs. I'm going to be very harsh with this kind of attitude. GIVE UP SOCIONICS NOW YOU ARE TOO IMMATURE TO HANDLE IT. The moment you believe that there is only 1 type you need, you're overly obsessed with socionics. Interact with every type. Get to know every type. Furthermore, you probably aren't the type you think you are due to the current mental and emotional situation you are in now.

Thirdly, if you really want to love someone, IEI or not, seriously think about gaining material. Pick up skills, learn a trade, make money, be successful. IEIs come at VERY high price. Go ask Starfall, Glamo or whoever else. They don't come easy AT ALL. Love is not free. You need money to get good clothes to look good. You need money to book a fine restaurant. You need money to purchase a good car. Then enough money to take her shopping. And then maybe to rent a place after that ^^ Finally, all that should be less than 2% of your monthly cashflow so that you can spend the rest on things that really matter i.e. you(r future). Once you get into a relationship, you may increase that amount to up to 5% since you'll be seeing her more often.

Fourthly, I was in your position 2 years ago. I understand where you're coming from, and chances are, I was more pathetic then than you are now or will ever be. So don't pity yourself, and don't hate yourself either. Work on a goal, even if it's to get an IEI chick. Work on it. Make it a long term project. Oh, and there are more than 2 IEI chicks in the world. I'm sure you know that by now.

[rat1]

Just follow your instincts... INFps will give you resistance but it is a facade. Do not fall for it. Plow right through their resistance and act on instinct, if you dont know what to say then just say exactly what's on your mind.. you will succeed I guarantee it.

[Leader]

Oh...so in other words just be myself. I can do that. That's what I needed to hear, I feel so much better now. Thank you guys :]

Reuben, I agree...in fact everything you said comes natural to me, I don't have to think about it, but now I realized that a big part of all my problems was my inability to accept that I really do need help and support. I never gave notice to socionics before but im glad I did now; after stumbling upon the concept of duals and IEI and witnessing first hand what its like to communicate with them I know im on the right track.