Pride - the main motive of LSEs-ESTjs?

[UDP]

UDP said it already, but I would think of an LSE's pride as a sense of satisfaction over doing something well. That's not a bad thing, within reason.

I have no idea why, but, my mind is connecting that (above) to this:

8w9's are more likely to let anger build up within themselves, which may manifest in constant bitterness and harshness. Like 8w7's, they view conflict as a way of life, but do not enjoy it as much, since when they are in rebellion against the outside world, they are also in rebellion against a part of themselves that would rather do without the hassle and zone out. They are slow to conflict - they would often rather stand "en garde" and wait for their adversary to "cross the line" - but when they involve themselves in conflict, their hostility has a relentless, sado-masochistic quality to it. They willfully numb their tender feelings, and show a tough face to the world. 8w9's are conspicuously sensitive to the issue of personal boundaries - both their own and everyone else's. "Stay out of my business, and I'll stay out of yours," they will often say in a measured tone that conveys great respect for the other while making it subtly clear that they will not be crossed. When they lighten up, they can be intensely devoted to the protection of others, especially defenseless people whom they have affection for. However, trust does not come easily to them. "Every person's survival is his own business."

And to this:



~the first two minutes when Seprihoth loses it.
I'm not saying Sephiroth the character is LSE or 8w9. It just triggered a connection.

[Marie84]

it actually makes sense if you read the LSE parts as LSI, Ij temperament instead of Ej (referring to Maritsa's posts)

[Absurd]

it actually makes sense if you read the LSE parts as LSI, Ij temperament instead of Ej (referring to Maritsa's posts)

All is alright, then. Down the rabbit hole we go.

[UDP]

Advice on how to properly show appreciation... to me at least. ....


Recognize what I have pride in
Absolutely refrain from flattery about the matter or any sort of over-graciousness or lofty praise, unless you know me very well, and even then, use this rarely.
Instead of verbally praising me, demonstrate in your actions and perceptions that you understand why I take pride in something (like, being a good _____), and that you also see the value in it.
Comment not "that I'm a good _____", but that I do XXXX well. If you can specifically demonstrate why I did something well (which involves being aware of what happened, what was possible, and the before and after of things), then I'll respect that awareness on your part very much.

If you attempt to flatter me without demonstrating to me in very real terms that you understand what it is that took place and why it matters to me, then it's actually worse than you saying nothing at all.

But if you do understand, and you do see, and then you feel like actually expressing it, then I'll actually feel good.


Even if I come off like "well, you should have known that before" or " ...('duh'.....)", it will mean a lot. I'll likely respond with "well, it's just a matter of course" or "sure". And say very matter of factly that I appreciate that you were able to acknowledge it. But it does mean a lot, when it's real.


It may be pretty hard to genuinely accept a compliment or praise about something very serious or that I take great pride in, and I feel very personally awkward about how to 'show appreciation' for such praise, because I usually don't like it and think it's fake or an attempt at trying to butter me up. But, if I can see that you appreciate "the work" in and of itself, then I'll feel more open to accepting whatever you present me with, praise or criticism or dismay.

[UDP]

Really good wholesome food and baked good also helps, too