Cheesy, well I do feel a bit "on guard" as far as making sure everything I'm saying is logical. Because of that, sometimes I say silly things (though just to throw her off), but I say them under the veil of "being logical" so it will stump her and make her think about it for a while. Like I will say authoritatively that a stranger we just passed is clearly an incompetent high school science teacher, based on whatever, just to make her overthink it and ask me all these silly follow-up questions, when in fact I really didn't have a strong opinion about the person and was basing it all on one or two little things I noticed about them.
Usually though, she does agree w/ me when we "discuss" and I just make a point to stay logical. It sounds like you may be INFj, based on how you mentioned having people "back you up." That sounds like my INFj friends in that situation, where as ENFps (in my experience) have a bit more feisty-ness and don't mind standing up when they get annoyed. But of course, I could be wrong and you could be ENFp..what do I know...this is just words on the internet after all
As far as how I feel in the friendship, it's a bit colder and more thought-out than other relations, but in general it's good because: I know how to not piss her off (I just keep things unemotional and logical and banter a bit), it's nice to know she is logical and won't take offense very easily, she makes plans and contingency plans well so I never need to bring a map when we hang out, I know exactly what to expect and she almost always acts the same way -- these are good and bad things. She's not someone I talk about any topics in which I feel vulnerable with, and wouldn't go to her for a pep talk.
Does that help you get a better idea, as far as your own type Cheesy?
and btw Cheesy, the way you wrote the above paragraph sounds exactly like how my INFj friend would describe this. I think INFjs can assert their opinion on feeling issues more confidently and clearly than ENFps (who can try to stay neutral-sounding).
for example, I might think someone was a "disgusting leach" but would very rarely say it that directly. Only with an extremely close friend and I would mutter it under my breath. Where as my INFj friend would often say things like that, because to her it was very clearly the truth. This can be humorous to others of course
I always found it amusing when she would say what (to me) sounded like shockingly critical things.