Attachment 2751
^This.
Look, it has nothing to do with one person being fake, or real. Both people are real. It has more to do with if you understand the socionics framework. If you have no idea about socionics, you may feel that the other person is undermining your attempts at connection. This was certainly the case between myself and this ESE. If we are to believe socionics at all, then everyone must agree that the information elements play a very apparent role in how people, personalities, interact with one another. The differences between Fe and Fi are as large as the differences between a Ford truck and a Smartcare. Sure, they are both vehicles, as both information elements are ethical in nature, but you could hardly call them similar. When found in two individuals who value either Fi, or Fe (and in this post I am just focusing on ego blocks), you are going to get a whole different personal perspective. So yeah, this part is obvious and I think everyone would agree.
So what are the differences?
I will start here. I don't believe that having Fi in your ego affects how I make decisions when it comes to choices that I must make about life. For example, if I am looking for a job, I am not sitting here thinking, who will I get along with? Will I like who I work with? Will they like me? Can me and my coworkers have a meaningful connection? Maybe when I was younger I might have thought alone those lines. With age comes maturity and I have found that it is pointless to think about these types of things BEFORE I have the job. The thing about Fi is that it seems to happen in no matter what situation I find myself in. So whether I am working for a National park, for the ambulance service, or as a security guard, or at a busy lumber mill, or going to school, I always have Fi going on in the back burner. I say back burner because as far as Information Elements go, its is pretty useless. Who cares, in the short term, who is getting along with who in a work place where production is occurring, or "the job just needs to get done"? It doesn't and is not necessary. Especially in today's age where a work place may have people coming and going on a pretty regular basis, so the turn around causes people to have little obligations socially to the people around him and her. Now, I say short term, because after a certain point, Fi really becomes the solid foundation on which all productive relationships are formed. After a certain point, however, it does becomes vital to the work place that people have relationships that are amicable, amiable, and helpful, or at the very least not destructive. The only way this seems to happen in the long term is if you have some people around who are Fi valuing, and its for this reason that Fi valuers seem to become the heart of their companies, or causes.
Fi as an ego block is flexible, it works in whatever scenario the person is in. It doesn't matter. In fact, as a young person it used to be a huge hindrance to me. No matter where I was, whether it was in a summer camp cabin, or a high school classroom, or at a family gathering, I become increasingly distracted by the interpersonal relationships going on around me, and in fact inside me as well. It's partly for this reason that I believe Fi valuers by nature seem to be so un-emotive even though the highly value the relationships they are forming in a given setting. The Fi ego is ALWAYS observing, even in ways that are not apparent to the outsider. Who are you? What do you you reveal about me? What do you think about such and such person, and what would your attitudes reveal about what you think of me? Do we think the same? Do we think differently? What about you would make me open up about? Endless questioning, mostly going on inside my head. It's a huge distraction and I have to actively concentrate on NOT doing it while at work. It is for this reason that Fi valuers would much rather have a formal system of interaction in the workplace, at least in the beginning. "Hello, how are you?" "Fine thank you, and how are you?". If you know you are working with an Fi valuer, know THIS: long before you may have ever thought about their character, they have already thought about yours a hundred times by now. They, over the long term have discovered who your parents were, how many children you have, how you felt about your cat dying 20 years ago, where you went to school, what your political views are, who you think are the better coworkers, how you act under stress, what you want out of life, what your values are. And you will have no idea they know all this stuff because they have only worked with you for such a short amount of time. They were sizing you up, not to hold a power over you, but in order to connect, which they feel they have, as soon as they started working with you. The trouble is, what does all that matter? For the sake of being productive it doesn't. For the sake of bringing meaning and fulfillment into the workplace, Fi valuers eventually do this, and over the long term those that feel more fulfilled in the workplace, will become more productive in the long run, as the job becomes more then just a pay cheque. Like I have said before I rarely make career decisions based on Fi information because I have learned that no matter where I am Fi is going to be playing inside my head regardless of outer circumstances.
(god, what a bad hat)