ESFjs who are NOT socially super outgoing

[Dionysus]

I am a socially introverted ESE (Socioncs extravert/extratim type with an extraverted subtype) and I can relate to EVERYTHING in this thread. I am very friendly, warm, likeable...but I am in the middle in terms of social introversion/extraversion.

Yes, socially introverted ESE's can certainly exist!

What makes you think you are an ESE with an extroverted sub type as opposed to an SEI with an extroverted subtype?

[mikesilb]

What makes you think you are an ESE with an extroverted sub type as opposed to an SEI with an extroverted subtype?

At one point I played with being an SEI, especially when I thought that a Socionics extravert/extratim relates to social extraversion (and hence, probably wasn't my type). As a result, there was a point when only introverted Socionics types were considered.

In spite of this, I noticed that I did not relate as well to to the extent that I related to . For example, I felt that I was not as immersed in moment-to-moment sensory impressions as much as I was deeply related to emotional energy (both my own and of the people around me). I was spending more time assessing the interpersonal cues from other people and trying to either conform to them and/or to modify them than I was in utilizing sensory impressions. Thus, seemed more right than .

Also, due to having the impression that I was a rationally dominant type, I knew that SEI would make less sense overall. I definitely could relate more to the 'attack-the-problem-head-on style' of EJ rather than to the more passively oriented IP. However for a few months, I stayed with SEI, thinking that I just had to be an subtype (using the 2-subtype system). The root of my reluctance to change was that I did not understand that Socionics extraversion is more of an energy and temperament-based measure rather than a socially driven measure.

Once other people asserted that I am a dominant type (due to my enthusiasm/passion, relatability/likeability, etc.) that got me on the right track towards realizing that I am an ESE rather than an SEI.

[Dionysus]

At one point I played with being an SEI, especially when I thought that a Socionics extravert/extratim relates to social extraversion (and hence, probably wasn't my type). As a result, there was a point when only introverted Socionics types were considered.

In spite of this, I noticed that I did not relate as well to to the extent that I related to . For example, I felt that I was not as immersed in moment-to-moment sensory impressions as much as I was deeply related to emotional energy (both my own and of the people around me). I was spending more time assessing the interpersonal cues from other people and trying to either conform to them and/or to modify them than I was in utilizing sensory impressions. Thus, seemed more right than .

Also, due to having the impression that I was a rationally dominant type, I knew that SEI would make less sense overall. I definitely could relate more to the 'attack-the-problem-head-on style' of EJ rather than to the more passively oriented IP. However for a few months, I stayed with SEI, thinking that I just had to be an subtype (using the 2-subtype system). The root of my reluctance to change was that I did not understand that Socionics extraversion is more of an energy and temperament-based measure rather than a socially driven measure.

Once other people asserted that I am a dominant type (due to my enthusiasm/passion, relatability/likeability, etc.) that got me on the right track towards realizing that I am an ESE rather than an SEI.

I guess my biggest qualm with this is that Extroversion vs. Introversion should be able to predict behavior of people - otherwise it (socionics) will always remains in the realm of conjecture only.

It is also not odd that you find yourself spending more time assessing interpersonal cues during interaction when you are with people because. . . well. . . when you are with people you will obviously spend more time focused on their emotions. Extroverts also tend to be more focused on their surroundings, whereas introverts are focused on their own thoughts/feelings/responses to those - your Fe seems to have a bent towards being focused on your own impressions, and you seem to have misunderstood Si dominance for a constant focus on the surroundings (when it isn't - because introverts are less focused on their environments).

The first sentence of the ISFp description at wikisocion says:
"SEIs have a strong connection to and ability to recognize internal physical states in themselves and others." - which is exactly how you analyzed yourself.

Furthermore, an ISFp is not necessarily inclined to be passive:
"SEIs often feel that they are in a rush, both mentally and physically. Therefore, they can sometimes feel like they need to get everything done at once (which can be explained by the SEIs base and role functions). When an SEI starts a personal project, they often have the tendency to try to get concrete results in the shortest amount of time, which can lead to rushing and carelessness. This could lead to the SEI becoming stressed and overworked."

(At the risk of stereotyping) your post also seems to have more Ti than an ESE would usually have. It is important when typing yourself to consider your Super-Id wishes (or needs); do you feel that you need more Ti or Ne from a partner?