Quote Originally Posted by Minde View Post
Yeah, I think I know what you mean. I think I have less a fear of being taken advantage of than you, but maybe I should have more. I also think I'm less likely than you to assert myself sometimes; I just... don't like doing it and it makes me upset when I feel I have to.

It makes me very happy to have someone think about me on their own, to consider my wants and needs without my pushing for it. That sounds selfish saying it like that... selfish to want someone to care for and consider me.

Occasionally delta STs will surprise me with moments of genuine... how to put it... they actually look, focus, figure out what I need, and work to meet that need. (The resulting work isn't usually a problem, it's the initial focus and noticing.) I haven't figured out the complete pattern for that, but it seems to happen most with ones who have had their own internal needs met already. But it is kind of rare, yeah.
It's not being selfish. You never want to emotionally invest in someone who isn't into you that way as well, it hurts way too much.