well?
i'm soooo tired out. and stressed. and out of balance. i just can't seem to get moving in a healthy direction. i need help!
well?
i'm soooo tired out. and stressed. and out of balance. i just can't seem to get moving in a healthy direction. i need help!
ILE
those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often
what have u been doing lately that's making you so fucked up? still got a man? the oldest girl is a teenager now right? is that part of your stress?
Last edited by bg; 10-11-2010 at 03:13 AM.
I know ur asking for Si not an interrogation, I just want to understand the reasons so that i can help u find the best ways to get that Si (and what's gunna be fuckin it up)
Last edited by bg; 10-11-2010 at 02:58 AM.
a lot of good new really, just not feeling that good. well i got a promotion and bought a new house. getting there on these two things took a lot out of me. now i'm in it with the new job which is management again. i'm just so tired. i know i would feel better if i would exercise and eat right but i can't seem to get going. it's hard to stop thinking about work and what i'm going to do about this or that. i feel like i'm totally out of balance.
ILE
those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often
Try not to feel too bad about not eating well. At the moment you've got it as an obligation, or a responsibility; IOW it's This Thing that you're not living up to and that sort of stuff tends to foster bad feelings in anyone.
The easiest way to deal with any such self-imposed tasks is to flip 'em around and turn them into a fun task. For me, I like turning things into puzzles or intellectual "challenges" (even if they're really simplistic like "make a brainstorm of things to eat"). I don't know what works for you.
Also if it makes you feel better I've been trying to fix my diet too You do not suffer alone, Blaze!
LOL, I don't know if you can "manufacture your own Si". Someone else just has to give you some; sorry. Maybe you can try simple things like resting and not getting up and going in the morning, right away, but getting up early and trying to stay in bed and feeling your sheets; get soft sheets and try to take a few extra minute in bed to enjoy it. I seem to have the same inability to enjoy rest as you do, as it seems. My ESE cousin, who is living with me now, reminds me not to get up and go, but to stay in and have coffee in bed sometimes.
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Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?
I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE
Best description of functions:
http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html
A night out with friends, a holiday, some day away on an activity trip where there's no kids, or a day at the spa, stone massage and stuff.
Something where you don't take your troubles with you for a while.
that's why i suggested a novel. at least for me, reading consumes all of my attention and keeps me there (once I've gotten into the book) so that work problems don't even enter my mind. as you're reading you're curled up in a blanket on a comfy sofa somewhere in a nice quiet room = Si
The most basic but also one of the most important things you can do as far as health is getting enough sleep. How much are you getting? If you're not getting a minimum 7 hours and preferably 8 it's not enough. I get pissed off if I'm getting to bed much past 10pm, because then I probably won't be able to get up early, and then I won't be able to get to work early, and then I won't have my hour to work out at home after work but before we need to pickup the kids from daycare. If I don't get enough sleep I'm also far more likely to need caffinee which is bad, or I'll eat more junk which is also bad, which also falls into the "not eating right" category. And if I don't get enough sleep I'm simply not going to have the energy needed to even work out and get some exercise in the first place.
So the basics of maintaining a healthy lifestyle for me all start with getting enough restful sleep. If I don't get that, it's like a domino effect where everything else will fall over too. I'll need caffinee, I won't eat right, won't have energy to work out, etc..
Te-INTp/ILI, my wife: Fi-ISFj/ESI, with laser beam death rays for ESTp/SLEs, lol
16 years of bliss in an Activity relationship
Take a walk at the sea shore
"In 1929, cousins Edward M. Knabusch and Edwin J. Shoemaker partnered and invested in the furniture business in the small town of Monroe, Michigan. Together, the duo set out to design a chair for 'nature’s way of relaxing.'"
What they manufactured:
And if anyone needs any evidence of how much I devalue Si, I offer my total disgust at La-Z-Boy recliners as proof.
LSI: “I still can’t figure out Pinterest.”
Me: “It’s just, like, idea boards.”
LSI: “I don’t have ideas.”
Do you have any days off work left? I mean, can you take a vacation? One week might be enough. A week somewhere warm, where the heat will somehow "force" you to relax. Perhaps the Caribbean, which should be a relatively short flight from the northern US & you don't have to deal with changing time-zones (maybe one hour or two, but that's usually not too stressful)?
Obsequium amicos, veritas odium parit
Take a walk. Since you live in a new neighborhood, I'm guessing you don't know everything about it yet or who all your neighbors are. Leave the kids at home and work at the workplace and just go for a nice stroll here and there. It could even be a way to get your butt moving even if it's only a little bit each day.
good suggestions all around. my problem is motivation. i can't seem to get moving. guess i'll just have to talk myself into action.
ILE
those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often
those who are easily stressed.....should be stressed more often
IME it's that attitude of shouldyness that is so bad for you. Like I said, try turning that sense of "I have to do BLAH" around into "Tackling BLAH can be fun". The more anyone feels obliged or pressured to do something, the less likely they are to do it, basically.
Go easy on yourself in other words If you don't want to do something, you can't make yourself.
update: i have managed to start eating breakfast lunch and dinner, although i'm still consuming too many calories at dinner. but the breakfast and lunch is working. oatmeal and a 1/2 banana, coffee. lunch is a lean cuisine and a rice crispy treat. then dinner.....up for grabs. anyway i am starting to feel better by just eating better.
now i have to develop an exercise strategy. one thing at a time i spose. :-)
ILE
those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often
get a waterslide for your new house. attach it to your bedroom window. that'll get you moving. weeeeeeeeeee
Removed at User Request
You're on a roll!! Keep it up!!
I think the part of the problem with Ne-dominants and Si, and why we need someone Si-dominant, because we often aren't able to recognize Si-related problems until they've gotten out of hand. And when we recognize some problem, it's hard to pinpoint where it's coming from and thus what to do about it.
So definitely, you and I are able to manufacture Si sorts of things, but the root of the problem is being attuned to those needs with any sort of precision. Which isn't something that can be changed, except just by being aware of that, and being more cognizant of taking care of yourself. Trial and error works too, like you sort of did.
Enneagram: 9w1 6w5 2w3 so/sx
totally. you don't see the root cause and by the time you notice you have a big job on your hands.
well i do have a strategy for exercise....there is a gym at work that you can use from 12:30 pm on. i haven't been wanting to stay after work to exercise, it's like, let me outta here already. but i think i could take a 1/2 hour of treadmill at lunch, at a walking pace and start with that. a colleague suggested this. plus he said take the stairs. i'm on the 10th floor so i'd have to work up to that but i think that's the current plan. now i just have to move my gym bag from the back of the van to the front seat, so i remember to take in in on monday. :wink:
ILE
those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often
Cool that you're doing something.. but why not walk outside for 1/2 an hour instead? :-p Just that I think you'll find walking on treadmills and such too boring to keep up. And even if you can use things to distract you (tv or your thoughts or w/e), at the end of the day it's just another thing in your life that you're bearing/have to distract yourself from rather than enjoying as a part of your life. It's hard to keep those type of things up.. and rather pointless in the scheme of things imo. Walking around outside can be enjoyable I think, depending on where you work I guess.. but at least you can peoplewatch etc.. and it can be like a form of meditation and destressor I think. If you can shut your mind off. On the other hand, shutting your mind off whilst on a treadmill might result in you falling off.
"Language is the Rubicon that divides man from beast."
Also, at the risk of getting corny, belly breathing can help a lot to destress/make you more aware of your body I think. Breathing as deep as possible when you think of it. 'Cause the stomach is where you can hold stress. Anyway, I find myself that if I'm nervous about something, just even thinking about the location of my stomach calms me down/makes me feel grounded. Like you pour more energy into your stomach when you think about relaxing it. My theory is that women might have more problems with letting go of stress than men 'cause we're used to holding our stomachs in. Stupid body image stuff. :-p
"Language is the Rubicon that divides man from beast."
yea i think i would do this on weekends, but during the week it's crazy. i have to pick up the kids, get them home, start dinner, then there's homework and bed time....a lot to do. i'm really tired by that time. i wake up around 5:30 am, so it's a long day and being in bed by 10 doesn't give you much time. i guess it could work. i could try it as a plan B.
ILE
those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often
If you're looking to fit in exercise then maybe gardening? You could also get an old fashioned lawnmower which you have to physically push. Grow veg and stuff.
Bing bing bing. Seven and a half hours of sleep, my dear. I appreciate it would be hard to take the hours out of somewhere else, so the best I can suggest is looking at your mattress (and nap during the day, maybe? It takes time and effort to find out the magic power nap duration/position that leaves you feeling refreshed after you wake up, however).
How good is your sleep quality? I've found the #1 thing for me is having to contend with poorly tailored, sleep-impeding mattresses.
Some warning signs: do you need to move a lot before drifting off? Your mattress is too hard, and too much pressure is being placed on contact points with it. Same if you wake up with a stiff/sore neck or shoulders. One mattress I was subjected to had me waking up with a bruised feeling in my shoulders because they were being squished between my mattress and the weight of my body. Another mattress was so soft I literally fell asleep the moment I got into bed because the mattress was supporting me, not locked in mortal combat with me.
EDIT
tl;dr, you might not be getting enough sleep, so you need to be making the most of it. Ten hours of wasted sleep on an uncomfortable mattress doesn't even begin to compare to six hours of good-quality sleep on a bed fitted to work for you.