I'm curious: Deltas, do you call your SO "sweetheart," "honey," etc.?
I'm curious: Deltas, do you call your SO "sweetheart," "honey," etc.?
All the time. "Babe" "sexy" "hot cake" "handsome" "good looking" "smart" "sweet" "my love" "honey" "dear" "sweetheart"
in Armenian...
"jan" 'j-gar" "sirun" "ser" "kyank" "em seertis" "hoakies"
En Francais...
"je t'aime" "Tu es ma joie de vivre" "Tu es mon mon amour" "Amour de ma vie"
Last edited by Beautiful sky; 04-08-2010 at 06:33 PM.
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Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?
I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE
Best description of functions:
http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html
maybe a saint is just a dead prick with a good publicist
maybe tommorow's statues are insecure without their foes
go ask the frog what the scorpion knows
I would say such things in my mind or in written form more than verbally. I would be a little embarrassed to voice it (maybe that would change in a reallly serious long-term relationship where we feel like a married couple, don't know) and sometimes it seems like a condescending way to talk to someone (depending on how you say it of course--"babe" is the worst offender that way--HATE being called "babe" and would NEVER think to do that to someone else). But the way I would say his name carries heartfelt emotion (don't know if it comes across to him though, I'm thinking an SLI would probably pick that up, no?).
That said, as far as pet names go, sweetheart and honey aren't my favorites (they go into the same category as "Babe"). . .i go for "sweetness," "love," "my dear {name}."
Enneagram: 9w1 6w5 2w3 so/sx
I used to date someone where we had a game where we'd come up with names like that for each other, anyway it got to some pretty ridiculous names, but it was tongue in cheek and made us laugh. Just had to be careful no one else heard us or they'd think we were insane, well, only be careful sometimes, the world'll find out sooner or later.
I like the idea of pet names, but currently have 0 w/ my current bf. He said usually girls call him things, but he says nothing in return. Weird.
In the past, guys have called me names, mainly feeler guys. Such as babe, baby, sweet pea, or silly made up names.
i'm ok w/ not using the fake names. I feel weird saying them. I agree w/ WorkaholicsAnon that I would be more likely to use them in writen form, like a text or something, but even then I feel a bit dumb.
Come to think of it, my SLI doesn't even say my name out loud very often at all. I've only heard him say it maybe a few times. I say his name a lot more just in conversation.
Hi! I'm an ENFP. :-)
Only if I wanted to annoy my significant other
How can someone not like being called something lovingly? I can't get that through my head. It seems like some kind of phobia for affection.
Yeah...I'd feel really dirty calling him Daddy. The word Daddy should never, ever be mentioned when I'm getting intimate with someone. Strangeness.
I'm on my BB so I'm not able to quote easily, but Lobo, I still stand by what I said. The delta irrationals here uniformly seem to be anti-pet name. You are EII, aren't you? Which is why you feel the way you do. I guess that's why SLI and IEEs are duals, neither would even want to use these cheesy nicks, so neither would have to ask the other to stop. I would totally ask a guy to stop calling me babe or sweetie (ick). It feels disrespectful and to me is hurtful and a turn off, just as Jessica expressed.
Enneagram: 9w1 6w5 2w3 so/sx
I thought i was the only one who felt like being called 'babe' was disrespectful..good to know I'm not. It just feels very demeaning to me...I know it's not meant to be that way, but that's how I feel everytime I hear it.
I think Workaholics has a good point, and it's probably true most of the time.
However, I do like to be called names like this, despite not usually using the names back. Which is kinda weird I guess.
I guess if they were to say it slightly teasingly/kidding around vs. being totally serious, that'd be fine.
But if a guy is drunk or something and calls me a cute name I like it.
Though I must say I had an ex (esfp) who called me babe constantly, and it did take me a long time to get used to it (I was never offended by it, but didn't quiet "get" it). I called him that back because he seemed to want me to, and it became a habit, though it never felt quite natural.
I actually think maybe it's more of a Fe thing? I feel kinda dumb saying Fe things. For instance, I could never say to a friend "you're a crazy bitch!" (endearingly) or "Damn hottie look at you!" etc. Though I hear Fe people say such things and it sounds great when they say it. I would rather say "that's a cute outfit" or "you're so funny."
So in conclusion, I think WHA is right, but I also will not turn down an ISTp calling me a cute name.
Hi! I'm an ENFP. :-)
I think you guys are bizarrely sensitive and attaching realms of meaning where it shouldn't be attached. lol I usually have 1-2 pet names for my SO, but I don't use them all the time. And they're usually different in each relationship.
I guess they could be viewed as offensive depending on how the person says them. But if I got the feeling that my SO was using the name in that fashion, what the hell am I doing DATING him?
And I say shit like this all the time.For instance, I could never say to a friend "you're a crazy bitch!" (endearingly) or "Damn hottie look at you!" etc. Though I hear Fe people say such things and it sounds great when they say it. I would rather say "that's a cute outfit" or "you're so funny."
Despite being Si, this quadra needs to relax.
IEE
I would say it depends on the Delta/individual.
Once we are officially in a relationship, I say "Dear" "My Love" and "Precious" *makes Gollum face.* Only in private though, I would be mortified if a SO did it in a public place, I'm a private person. I've only been in one relationship in my life though. I have to have gotten to know him on a deep level before we get to this stage of our relationship. It's an indication that I feel safe with him, and it's one of the greatest things in the world when my special someone calls me that too. It makes me feel wanted and accepted, there are a lot of places in the world where I feel like an outsider but I can be myself with him. If a guy didn't say these things, he probably wouldn't be the person for me.
I guess this is a little part of a love language (?) I mean, words of affirmation is more one of my love languages but it's a weird subtype of that in my book.
I know some people think that's yucky and mushy, and it is to an outsider. I get grossed out if I'm not an insider.
But if some guy who I wasn't in a relationship calls me sweetie, I'll want to avoid that creepo.
xII se PoLR, 9w1-5w4-2w3 sp/so
Phlegmatic-Melancholic |RCoAI| Fascinator| Newtype-secondary| LEFVl|
#JusticeforJeb_, Water Sheep did nothing wrong, High Inquisitor Of Council of Water Sheep and Water Sheep's protector
Make things right? Who are we to decide when things are right and when they need to be fixed?
lol I said dear today to a pakistani veggie seller Id never met before... I call "dear", "beauty" or smth ending with -y pretty much everyone.
assuming I am indeed delta, yes, I use pet names
I have no significant other, but I absolutely despise pet names.
I know a LSE/SEI couple and he calls her heifer, and she calls him heifer.
But yea of course it needs proper timing to feel right. If it's too early in the relationship it just feels cringe and forced.
Fi-Ne-Si would probably come up with some pet name that's an inside joker or very particular inside reference. That's how I feel like I would do it anyway.
Heifer, huh? Not sure if I would go for that. xD
In general, nah, pet names aren't my thing.
My EII grandmother does not tend to call my LSE grandfather many pet names. I've heard "dear" a few times, I think, but it tends to sound offhand. The LSE doesn't even use that, but he does use her name more frequently than needed.
Incidentally, the LSE usually sounds to me warmer and more caring of her without using pet names than the EII does of him when she says "dear".
Last edited by FreelancePoliceman; 01-25-2020 at 04:44 AM.