Socializing and pointless small talk for Deltas

[UDP]

I don't really give a damn any more, honestly. I'm tired of waiting for people to say things so I tend to start conversations when I want, or be silent when I want to. I seem to mostly know a lot of introverted people (?), so I tend to just start things up anyways. It baffles me that people sometimes "wait" for other people to bring things up.

The only time I tend to be quiet is if there are a lot of weird social things going on or raucousness that seems pointless or destructive or foolish - sometimes that's because it actually is, or because I haven't been acclimated to it yet.

I tend to gravitate towards people and discussions and arenas I personally like or enjoy - there are plenty of losers and uninteresting things out there, best not to put energy into those things unless it's important . . .

[Creepy-Cyclops]

Some interesting replies. I wanted to say thanks to those who've contributed. I don't have time atm to respond directly to some of them, or add further information, but it seemed appropriate to at least let you guys know i've read them

Hmmmm, i'll try to reply to some:

I don't really give a damn any more, honestly. I'm tired of waiting for people to say things so I tend to start conversations when I want, or be silent when I want to. I seem to mostly know a lot of introverted people (?), so I tend to just start things up anyways. It baffles me that people sometimes "wait" for other people to bring things up.

The only time I tend to be quiet is if there are a lot of weird social things going on or raucousness that seems pointless or destructive or foolish - sometimes that's because it actually is, or because I haven't been acclimated to it yet.

I tend to gravitate towards people and discussions and arenas I personally like or enjoy - there are plenty of losers and uninteresting things out there, best not to put energy into those things unless it's important . . .

The bolded part - pretty much applies to me also. It reminds me of something i'd mentioned recently to Lobo, hmmmm.

I see your point, but you spend almost as many waking hours with them as you do with family. Your work IS your life, at least a big part of it. If your conversations are superficial you need to go deeper, not shut them out.

(How's that for advice from an SLI?)

Thank you for the advice.

Some people simply amaze me. How is this a conversation for instance?

Person A: I like red cars
Person B: Yeah so do I
Person A: I never used to like red cars, but I quite like them now
Person B: Yeah I like red cars more than I used to as well

*I consider contributing that statistically, red cars are more likely to be involved in accidents than any other cars*

Person A: Don't you think some cars look cleaner than others
Person B: Yeah definately, i've noticed that too.

And so on...

Thing is, they are both presumably at least average intelligent people, have good degrees from university etc, i'd only have a conversation like that if I was joking, like laughing at myself for having it, but they are incredibly serious. I'd possibly also have that conversation among friends if I was feeling rather brain dead.

That's actually the best bit of the conversation, ie the most interesting, it get's so dire that I don't even like to remember it.

you're absolutely right. It's all smalltalk, but then again, most people are dying for attention, and it's this need I frequently give in to. I let people talk, whine, complain and gossip to me and I respond to them as if I take them seriously, meanwhile thinking "get yourself a fucking life". I even take the initiative when I perceive someone might need some attention. It's my way of making money.

Privately I'm more inclined to keep people at distance.

I notice the me me me thing.

There was some guy going on about his car, it was needing fixed at the garage, suffice to say it is some big high performance sports car.

Anyway, he'd mentioned what the problem was. I happen to know a bit about mechanics and went to discuss it with him. The guy is a super control freak and was annoyed at the idea of someone knowing more than him. Apparently this is a common thing with him so I have heard.

He basically just wants to be centre of attention, so best thing to do is just to agree with him, even if he's talking things which I know for fact are crap, it simply makes for easier life that way.

[Suz]

He basically just wants to be centre of attention, so best thing to do is just to agree with him, even if he's talking things which I know for fact are crap, it simply makes for easier life that way.

Sometimes you just have to smile and nod, smile and nod. . .

[UDP]

hey at least you can come here and talk to great people like workaholics and me.

[Cyrano]

Some people simply amaze me. How is this a conversation for instance?

Person A: I like red cars
Person B: Yeah so do I
Person A: I never used to like red cars, but I quite like them now
Person B: Yeah I like red cars more than I used to as well

*I consider contributing that statistically, red cars are more likely to be involved in accidents than any other cars*

Person A: Don't you think some cars look cleaner than others
Person B: Yeah definately, i've noticed that too.

And so on...

I hate to argue with a fellow SLI, but YOU caused this mess. You could have advanced the conversation, but you chose to let it decay. You could have noted that red paint fades like beauty, or that red cars get ticketed more often by the Man. You could have asked the hot girl if she likes red cars - like yours, at sunset, after work, tonight. But no, you just let the patient die on the table and then complain about the smell.

When will you SLI's learn!!!!!

[Lobo]

I hate to argue with a fellow SLI, but YOU caused this mess. You could have advanced the conversation, but you chose to let it decay. You could have noted that red paint fades like beauty, or that red cars get ticketed more often by the Man. You could have asked the hot girl if she likes red cars - like yours, at sunset, after work, tonight. But no, you just let the patient die on the table and then complain about the smell.

When will you SLI's learn!!!!!

hahaha, the SLI sage.