Originally Posted by Gilly
IEI-Fe 4w3
Yeah, you could tell her and it would be fine. Thinking her mom might be a cougar would definitely be good for a laugh.
IEE
a couple flags here:'
"Her daughter told me that she really enjoyed talking to me and that she thinks i'm attractive and a nice guy."
The girl said this to you, thinking you had a girlfriend? Being interested in dating you despite you having a girlfriend (imaginary though she is), is a flag.
Also, it's odd her mother and father were in a bar with her right? And that they're talking to people for her?
She might have some issues because of that, such as being open to dating guys w/ girlfriends. So just FYI. People who are willing to cheat w/ others may also be willing to cheat on you. Just keep in mind.
That said, yeah, you can easily mention you aren't seeing someone now. You can just call her and explain you're not seeing anyone now and would she like to go out. Don't even need to explain. She'll be exciting to hear that I'm sure, and later on after you know her well you can explain why that happened (w/ the mom thing).
Hi! I'm an ENFP. :-)
I also actually kinda found that weird. Even as painfully shy as I can be with guys on the dating scene, I would never let my mom do that for me. Actually, I would die of embarrassment if she ever tried to.
Anyway, see? The IEEs here agree with me--just tell her straight out what happened. It's FUNNY and kinda sweet, not rude or creepy. If she really is IEE, I recommend taking your duals' advice in this.
Enneagram: 9w1 6w5 2w3 so/sx
why is it bad to tell someone those nice things, even if they're seeing someone else? I don't think it necessarily means she's willing to cheat! Sounds to me like she was just being honest. I mean, Cyclops isn't married. So if things were to not work out with his imaginary girlfriend, he might start seeing this real girl.
IEI-Fe 4w3
Natural attraction is supposed to dissipate just like that? All it says is that she's straightforward. Besides, it didn't sound like she was exactly throwing herself at him; maybe she just really likes him.
Yeah that is a little odd, might signal that something is off if this is a regular occurrance, but it's also possible they just decided to go out once together and it was just a coincidence. Keep the eyes open, I guess.Also, it's odd her mother and father were in a bar with her right? And that they're talking to people for her?
I don't even want to get into what a heinously presumptuous half-deduction this is.She might have some issues because of that, such as being open to dating guys w/ girlfriends. So just FYI. People who are willing to cheat w/ others may also be willing to cheat on you. Just keep in mind.
Yeah, but saying that doesn't necessarily imply she expects him to cheat on his girlfriend. He already knows she was interested in him from the beginning of the conversation, so telling him she enjoyed talking to him doesn't mean all that much. I'd consider it just a compliment. Nothing wrong with liking."Her daughter told me that she really enjoyed talking to me and that she thinks i'm attractive and a nice guy."
Being at a bar with her parents - I don't think that's odd in Europe. Cyclops may correct me if I'm wrong. Bars don't have the same social scene or connotations there that they do here. It depends on the bar, of course. But I remember seeing even little kids at neighborhood bars with their parents.
IEE
ESTj or extraverted men are more likely to go to the pub and among women are Extraverts and ISFp's.
You'll hardly find ESFj's at t a pub (in any regular time), same with INTp's, and other types.
So yes, it is somewhat type related.
She want's emotional affirmation that you're not seeing anyone. If you're not then just tell her simply "I am not seeing anyone." Then see what her reaction will be. Approach it by being honest. If she asks you, "well why did you tell my mom...."; you can tell her by joking, in a coy way that "I thought she was hitting on me, and I did not want to be rude in leading her on."
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Dual type(as per tcaudilllg)
Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?
I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE
Best description of functions:
http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html
going to pubs is not type-related.
IEI-Fe 4w3
yeah right. If a guy is "taken" (has a gf, married, etc.) then it's totally acceptable for a woman to flirt with him, have someone tell him she likes him, say he's attractive, nice, a good catch, whatever. Why not? It's just a "compliment." Um, yeah. That makes no sense.
A compliment from someone's grandmother, sure. "What a nice young man you are!" But from a woman who has just sent someone over to hit on a man? No way. That's absurd to think that's "harmless."
And married or not doesn't matter. In a relationship is being with someone and saying you won't cheat.
Maybe he'll find the new girl more attractive than his wife/gif. Then they can get a divorce or he'll dump the girlfriend for her. What's the problem with that? Or maybe they can just cheat together. No problem with that either, right?
I find it funny so odd that many people here just agreed with the above. Get some ethics people.
Hi! I'm an ENFP. :-)
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