Emotional side and expression of ILIs-INTps

[Absurd]

[alklonth]

The humans are dead.

[rickydcooper]

As an Ili, emotional expression mostly confuses me. As the last conscious process in my mind ity is difficult to give it priority and often when huge amounts of fe being thrown arond it often comes across as annoying noise. In situations such as parties I am often shy about expressing myself, but under stress I am able to use my id functions and can actually be quite witty and jovial. If you can emotionally warm an Ili up, there is nothing stopping them from expressing themselves. Fe is not used as a tool, however, and skillful fe users can be quite imposing. Around Hugo I can eventually warm up, much more difficult around hamlet as he tends to make me feel overwhelmed as he emotionally runs laps around me. Fe is tough for me qnd I am mostly better off using ti to communicate with them.

[blackburry]

LOL why did i not see the tampon licker before?


I know two ILIs both are mild in their expressiveness. both become more so in the presence of their other friends. (so i think the issue is when they're around me).

[Nowisthetime]

Slavoy Žižek is emotionally expressive in his own way. Maybe someone disagrees but I type him ILI.

[Korpsy Knievel]

Slavoy Žižek is emotionally expressive in his own way. Maybe someone disagrees but I type him ILI.

Zizek is one of my favorite modern comedians but from my vantage he's probably ILE.

[Nowisthetime]

Zizek is one of my favorite modern comedians but from my vantage he's probably ILE.

I'm kinda surprised at that typing, because I think he is very far from ILE. Yes, NT irrational, seems outgoing, but not much more in common. Everything he says is basically and he has a very characteristic coldness despite the excitement. Creative subtype.

[Korpsy Knievel]

I'm kinda surprised at that typing, because I think he is very far from ILE. Yes, NT irrational, seems outgoing, but not much more in common. Everything he says is basically and he has a very characteristic coldness despite the excitement. Creative subtype.

I didn't say you had to fuck him, I'm just saying Zizek isn't ILI.

[717495]

I find a lot of Fe types lack emotional expressiveness, that is, the automatic human kind (where you can merely look at someone and see their soul, and get a sympathetic response without it being ridden with some dependent occurrence.) Fe quadras instead seem like they have more of an on-off switch, ime, appropriating at any level to a given object while remaining dead the rest of the time. This can make them seem cold and hard to connect to, unless I can get over my lacking of socially "playing along" to where we can find some external connection in events. Instead I view my emotions as a continuous implicit stream, something you can always rely on, like the sun always coming up and moving west. This is how a number of xLIs are, even to where this implicit stream is highly emotive without any fine expressive qualities. I've witnessed it being annoying, brash and badly-played to EIEs and other merry types, almost like they're assuming we have some sort of mental illness and can't act "right." Sometimes Fi comes across like their PoLR, and it's an odd feeling that they lack something so essentially human, that they seem like robots with on-off switches activated by the events around them, unable to trigger the warm feeling always inside of them.

edit: I have also come to learn that what a lot of Fe/Ti-ers consider "bad manners" are merely not being sociable or responding accordingly, which to me, seems overly fake and not a good judge of character (taking something like manners as serious as requiring sociability.) Bad manners to me would be insulting someone without a sarcastic tone (which is something I purposefully even do because I'm crazy .) Sometimes showing bad manners means you care more. I personally like to get a sense of someone's uniqueness and tend not to judge them, especially not as much as Fe/Ti drama queens. The illusion of Fi being judgemental stems from us being individuals not adhering to what everyone else wants, instead focusing on that special place unique to us. I accept that other people have their own special feelings. A lot of times I get type 4 and Fi confused, because they both seem essential to who I am and I can only understand typology subjectively, but I have come to understand that 4ness has more to do with understanding and accepting uniqueness than it does merely assuming it.

[FoxOnStilts]

Barely at all.

[Theta]

Strictly speaking, any action is coupled to an emotional expression, even if this expression is not directed to entertain or catch the attention of the group with an intentional constant maneuvering, which in my formed opinion is more characterictic of
In my experience ILI shows emotionality even by poker facing, when you observe the details you can catch the inflection of voice, the changes of posture, etc which are representative of some emotional state in ILI. Emotional reactions common to be seen are either some sort of state of agitation, when the ILI mobilizes or is "in the zone" and also sudden burst of aggression, specially if the ILI doesn't canalize this through cynical jokes and comments.
On another insightful comment, ILI could express any emotion in the emotional spectrum, but as soon as the ILI's metaconsciousness reveals this state the ILI tends to feel awkwardly caught up in the emotional state, specially when the state produces lots of visceral changes in the body. An example of this is when there is euphoria around, the ILI will most probably experience this euphoria as exhausting for the body and mind.
Also usually ILI could be identified by their sudden responses, or emotional outbursts that they cannot control. I believe this to be to a suggestive which boost aggression as a way to canalize assertivity and impulsiveness. Maybe this is some sort of release valve that allows some of the energy that has been contained for too long, due to ILI's more common state of inertia, to relieve pressure. Also it seems pretty natural that the energy needs to keep flowing somehow (even if ILI's motivation may move them into not moving)....Like some sudden solar eruptions that are natural to certain cosmical objects (and beings).

[chriscorey]

My dad is ILI and it's almost never. I've never seen him shed one tear, not even when his mother died. He is calm, cool and collected for the most part. He has been angry a few times and that's it.

[InvisibleJim]

I opened this thread because of a personal discussion. The logic is very simple, in SLI and ILI Fe in Model A is function 4, it is irritating and only used in irritation and it's all about emotional expression. In my view, you tend to catch SLI/ILIs using words which imply their emotional state, but very rarely referring to the underlying emotional state or indeed appearing emotional in person.

[Hot Scalding Gayser]

There are many emotions rather than just your typical warm-hearted aww mushy feelings.

A lot of so-called 'Logical' and 'Scientific' types actually have strong feelings. But they're often some sort of intense anger or frustration... so that's why they stereotypically feel more 'bad-ass' than your average IEI or SEI. Hatred and Anger is just every bit of a feeling as Love and Fear is.... that's why I really don't like the word 'emo' as some all purpose insult. Everybody feels deeply it's part of being a hooman. It just depends on what feelings you typically have more often than not.

[Inguz]

There are many emotions rather than just your typical warm-hearted aww mushy feelings.

A lot of so-called 'Logical' and 'Scientific' types actually have strong feelings. But they're often some sort of intense anger or frustration... so that's why they stereotypically feel more 'bad-ass' than your average IEI or SEI. Hatred and Anger is just every bit of a feeling as Love and Fear is.... that's why I really don't like the word 'emo' as some all purpose insult. Everybody feels deeply it's part of being a hooman. It just depends on what feelings you typically have more often than not.

I was a friend with an ILI-Ni 4w5, she is probably one of the most emotional people that I have met. By this I mean that she felt her emotions so strongly that she started shaking physically. There certainly was more emotionally deep than just anger. She seemed to feel more classic enneagram 4 emotions. Her "badassery" was extended to for example give some girl the finger in response to driving by and waving. I asked her why she did that and all I got out from her was "I don't know...", and when I asked the girl in the car if there had been any conflict between the two she was just clueless to what caused the ILI's behaviour. It certainly wasn't badass, it was just silly.

Secondly, not everyone does feel deeply. Psychopaths are the prime example of this.


On topic, she wasn't expressive as is meant by the more theatrical Fe, but she did talk very much about events relating to how she feels. The most outward expressions was an "awwh" and an unexpected hug when I talked about the breakup I went through at the time, plus the angry/resentful gurns that she made when I teased her "with the use of" Fe. It looked something like this with the difference that she so clearly was irritated at me.

[chriscorey]

I seem robotic unless you attempt to take away my free will, then:

[Aiss]

what a nonsensical thread. ilis have no emotions, obviously. /thread

[End]

what a nonsensical thread. ilis have no emotions, obviously. /thread

It only seems that way. It's actually very strong, but we've leaned the hard way to suppress that aspect. Emotions are easily manipulated by others, hence, why we try to poker face through interpersonal interactions. The more the other person acts on the assumption that we're a cold hearted emotionless robot the better. If, somehow, they grasped upon the fact that our emotions are rather intense they may be able to screw us over hard. Thankfully (or sadly, depending on your perspective), rare is the person who grasps how emotional my type is.

[PlacentaCake]

Depends on who I'm with and if I think they are interesting and/or funny enough to open up to. Otherwise, I suppose I can seem blank, cold, or I've even been told I look depressed when I'm just not really engaged at all. If im still around and have a blank face, I'm probably just observing because something has caught my attention.

[Pookie]

Do you have any experience of the ILIs around you being emotionally expressive; or not so much, or barely at all?

Can you elaborate into the particulars of the situation?

I know three off the top of my head. A, G, & P.

P sometimes smiles. Very monotone, but expresses happiness subtly when he feels clever. Likes to add his two cents.
G can get very passionate when he complains. The government! Mosanto! Conformist culture! ...bleh. He's a young cat though, i'm sure he'll grow out of it. He has go-to expressions when he's excited. Not good at realizing when he acts selfishly, but no problem enacting the emotional feeling through expression if he feels like it. Valued but weak Fi maybe?
A is a G. He's constantly thinking about some way to accomplish an immediate goal, and often celebrates when he's successful. He'll poke and prod at people seemingly randomly and then immediately give up ground(acknowledging that he doesnt believe what he's saying) and laugh. Says things all the time that change the room atmosphere. People give him hell for it, but i laugh because awkward is hilarious to me. Especially when its on purpose.

[Iris]

I was dating an ILI once and he handed me a present for my birthday. I said oh my gosh what did you get me? He shuffled his feet and said, "Just some crappy shit..." (it was actually a couple of thoughtful gifts.)

[crazymaisy]

I was dating an ILI once and he handed me a present for my birthday. I said oh my gosh what did you get me? He shuffled his feet and said, "Just some crappy shit..." (it was actually a couple of thoughtful gifts.)

He felt inside the way you were expressing, exited over it, but freaking just couldn't let that out. Appearance: underwhelmed, and stupid comments come out. I get his side. Alone getting the gift and readying it for you he was "normal" --the future was bright and wonderful. That dissolved into nobody holding nothing much in front of you.

[perpetuus]

I was dating an ILI once and he handed me a present for my birthday. I said oh my gosh what did you get me? He shuffled his feet and said, "Just some crappy shit..." (it was actually a couple of thoughtful gifts.)

I know a male ILI who does this a lot--downplaying anything he has put a lot of thought, time or creativity into. It's frustrating because I can't tell if he does it to downplay his achievements/be humble or if it's because he's unhappy with the final products that never seem to live up to what he envisioned.

[nigh]

Emotion's got a wide spectrum of siblings. From the most negative end to the most positive end, so to speak. For example, in no specific order: sadness, hatred, guilt, fear, anger, shame, concern, content, resentment, courage, joy, affection, happiness, and so on.

I agree with some of the things @truck said. It's just that we tend to favour certain items when it comes to emotion. Some people favour anger. Some shame and sadness. Some joy, thrill and exuberant expression of certain passion. We all have different canals for emotional communication. So those who favour anger would feel anger very deeply while not feeling other emotions with the same depth. It can't mean they don't feel any emotion at all. Anger is still an emotion.

AFAIK, psychopaths feel much anger. That's like the only emotion they can feel the most and the deepest. In general. Oh and this doesn't mean people who favour anger are somewhat like psychopath or something.

About ILIs and their emotional expression: I don't think I know enough ILIs to have an opinion about that, so...

[mikemex]

Emotionally constrained my ass. Every time I smile at an SLI / ILI, they always smile back very nicely.

[InvisibleJim]

Emotionally constrained my ass. Every time I smile at an SLI / ILI, they always smile back very nicely.

[chriscorey]

Emotionally constrained my ass. Every time I smile at an SLI / ILI, they always smile back very nicely.

[Scapegrace]

This thread is soooo emo.

[Azure Flame]

I think some ILI's try to be out of social expectation. But for the most part they almost never tell you they like you.

My ILI friend married an EIE who constantly drilled verbal affirmation out of him to the point that he went crazy and they divorced. He must have learned that a lot of people need that from others, and he one day came up to me and said, "I don't tell very many people how I feel about them, but I enjoy hanging out with you and think you're one of the coolest people here."

<3

Anyway I can see emotions shifting in people so I usually don't need that from them, but yes, I can see their emotions when they are standing before me.

[Beautiful sky]

My mommy is ILI. Her father passed on yesterday and I called her to talk to her and gage her emotions to see if she was doing ok.

She went on and on about how my grandfather kept saying that he was so proud that he had such wonderful kids and my mom kept telling me "honey, I love you guys so much. I have such wonderful kids. My father used to say about how wonderful we were and I thought I look at you guys now and I think what wonderful kids I have." She goes on and on about some points that stick out to her as she holds back tears but mostly my mother takes it out on herself physically, she doesn't eat well when she's depressed and sad, she makes herself physically quite ill. I'll have to ask my brother, her dual, to go and monitor her senses.

[SyrupDeGem]

In my personal experience ILI's are much better at expressing negative emotins that positive ones. The only positive they seem to be be ok with expressing is contentment, anything more than that is a ILI faux pas. Sadness is also not ok because it is not productive.

Things that are ok to express for ILI's. Annoyance, Irritability, being cross and anger.

Also, dry witted remarks and sarcasm.


Edit: Love does not exist in the spoken word in ILI world, it is only expressed physically.

[chriscorey]

In my personal experience ILI's are much better at expressing negative emotins that positive ones. The only positive they seem to be be ok with expressing is contentment, anything more than that is a ILI faux pas. Sadness is also not ok because it is not productive.

Things that are ok to express for ILI's. Annoyance, Irritability, being cross and anger.

Also, dry witted remarks and sarcasm.


Edit: Love does not exist in the spoken word in ILI world, it is only expressed physically.

I express love through my actions and these actions are not necessarily physical. I can't speak for all ILIs though :/

[chriscorey]

In my personal experience ILI's are much better at expressing negative emotins that positive ones. The only positive they seem to be be ok with expressing is contentment, anything more than that is a ILI faux pas. Sadness is also not ok because it is not productive.

Things that are ok to express for ILI's. Annoyance, Irritability, being cross and anger.

Also, dry witted remarks and sarcasm.


Edit: Love does not exist in the spoken word in ILI world, it is only expressed physically.

Negative emotions? In my experience they’re the most potent and therefore the easiest to express. I think this is true for many. Anger is difficult to control and how pissed off would you be if you already knew it was going to happen and you did it anyway?

ILI are not emo, we’re jaded. I love the song "wish you were here"

[ConcreteButterfly]

Do you have any experience of the ILIs around you being emotionally expressive; or not so much, or barely at all?

Can you elaborate into the particulars of the situation?

ILIs along with SLIs are some of the most emotional people I've ever met. It's that Fi Hidden Agenda, it's so much a part of them that it leaks through in everything they do. ILIs usually express it by advising others about what won't work (base ), and offer practical help (creative ). They can be very funny, witty and kind around people they trust. ILIs have suggestive so unconsciously they try to provoke confrontation in others, but this isn't out of hatred for others but out of a desire to draw out the strongest forces in the environment, and work with them to achieve some higher goal (Gamma objectives).

[IBTL]

ILIs along with SLIs are some of the most emotional people I've ever met. It's that Fi Hidden Agenda, it's so much a part of them that it leaks through in everything they do. ILIs usually express it by advising others about what won't work (base ), and offer practical help (creative ). They can be very funny, witty and kind around people they trust. ILIs have suggestive so unconsciously they try to provoke confrontation in others, but this isn't out of hatred for others but out of a desire to draw out the strongest forces in the environment, and work with them to achieve some higher goal (Gamma objectives).

Yes! This is a very insightful post. My lovely ILI boyfriend used to say that I was being "fake" whenever I wasn't getting "emotional", so he would just try to provoke me into getting "emotional". Unfortunately, it would just make me "angry" and unhappy with him. Now, I simply have to "remind" him that I don't use Fi as well as he does, so I'm not being "fake" if I don't express Fi "emotion". I'm being Fe...

[End]

ILIs along with SLIs are some of the most emotional people I've ever met. It's that Fi Hidden Agenda, it's so much a part of them that it leaks through in everything they do. ILIs usually express it by advising others about what won't work (base ), and offer practical help (creative ). They can be very funny, witty and kind around people they trust. ILIs have suggestive so unconsciously they try to provoke confrontation in others, but this isn't out of hatred for others but out of a desire to draw out the strongest forces in the environment, and work with them to achieve some higher goal (Gamma objectives).

I can agree with this. I want the people I love to succeed and be happy, so much so that I'd gladly fail in my endeavors if in doing so I ensure their success. What you say is also kinda theological. God may well allow a demon to tempt you, but only because he knows that said temptation will cause you to pay closer attention to that specific area in you life and thus increase the odds of you realizing you need to do something about that...

[Pinchy]

The ILI that I know of is very idiosyncratic with his emotions. Honestly, they are expressive. They use body language and facial expressions to show their emotions. God forbid they have to explain themselves. Lol then you gotta pull that info out of them.
For example, when they are in rage they rant. When they find something funny they chuckle. Like, they are people who like to suppress their emotions, but they still feel and express stuff. Key word: subtle. They don't say how they feel. They show how they feel.

[Carnaedy]

I live with an ILI-Ni, and I would even dare call myself her friend. She does seem rather reserved and subdued when she is around the people outside of her immediate circle – to the point she almost seems like an android more than a human – yet when she is with her in-group, her emotions pour out wildly and, I would say, with very little control at all. "Binary" is the word that would describe it the best, in my opinion. If she is happy, she is ecstatic; if she is angry, she is furious; if she is sad, the end of the world is coming; if she is worried about something, it is a full-blown anxiety. There simply is no middle ground between having no (or very subdued and subtle) emotion and having ALL of the emotion for her, as far as I am concerned.

[End]

I live with an ILI-Ni, and I would even dare call myself her friend. She does seem rather reserved and subdued when she is around the people outside of her immediate circle – to the point she almost seems like an android more than a human – yet when she is with her in-group, her emotions pour out wildly and, I would say, with very little control at all. "Binary" is the word that would describe it the best, in my opinion. If she is happy, she is ecstatic; if she is angry, she is furious; if she is sad, the end of the world is coming; if she is worried about something, it is a full-blown anxiety. There simply is no middle ground between having no (or very subdued and subtle) emotion and having ALL of the emotion for her, as far as I am concerned.

I will have to concur with this binary assessment of my type. If we trust you, and I mean really trust you, we drop our mask and show you our intense emotions and to hell with how you may potentially screw us over. We trust you, please value that. If not? Then poker face...

[Dalek Caan]

I think everybody has basic emotions; it's just that Fe Polrs don't care for mimicking or playing off the emotions of other people. Maybe a lack of mirror neurons or something.