Originally Posted by
Mimosa Pudica
Thank you Merc!!!
I like your style, and I agree with most of what you say.
NB! There are no "problems" with the boy, he's a normal, well-behaved kid, extremely positive, active and helpful, and we have a superb relation. I just used him as an example.
I'd like to hear from you and other SLEs how YOU saw the world when you were small (4 - 13 years)? How did you feel when you were in unknown situations (did you also react with anger in any kind of stress)? Also, because many SLEs have an almost aggressive way of moving and looking at times, they will often be treated harder than others from the start. Example - my IEI daughter (the one he hugs in the photo) is met from the start with a sweet tone of voice and smiles whenever she meets new people, while people meet my son with hard words like "don't misbehave" from the start. It's so damn unfair, and I wonder how this will influence him in the long run? In the short run it works this way - my daughter loves to meet new people, my son hates any kind of new situation, and gets stressed (thus angry) when we are going out. He needs a lot of support from his sister/parents to be in a good mood in such situations. And that again influences the way people meet him. Bad loop. What about conflicts? How does is feel to be "broken" for an SLE? I agree with Mercs comment about "punishment" working the wrong way, but I can't always be around, and teachers could punish him in school later, if he's questionning their authority. So how will he react to being "broken"? He always questions authority. Experiences? Stories? Thoughts? Feelings? I'd love to hear about it, just to understand better now and later.
One story: My SLE ex-boyfriend was in the backseat of a car, he was drunk. So was the driver (drunk) and the brother of the driver (in the front seat). The car crashed, and the brother of the driver was thrown out of the car. Before the police/ambulance came, my SLE bf offered to take the place of the driver. So the SLE was arrested and convicted for driving when drunk, and the real driver could go with his brother in the ambulance to the hospital. And take care of his own terrible trauma for having almost killed his brother.
The SLE then had to live with people finding him a terrible person, even spitting at him once, and they all projected all kinds of shit onto him. You won't believe what they said about him! I was amazed at his nobility in this. He sacrificed so much of his own reputation for a friend, so that the friend could be with his brother in a crisis situation. I think this tells quite a lot about how people judge SLEs before they even know them or their story. (I mean, had I crashed the car when driving drunk, people would feel for me, I think, and they would have wanted to "help me")
! (Sorry for that too lol).
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