oh, another reason why i grew out of grudge-holding. i reasoned that it was unnecessarily limiting my future options. you see, if you're holding a grudge/having a vengeance mindset, you're fixing that person to the same character forever. he's (or she) scum and will never change in your mind. even though like nivek said, i'd plan my actions assuming that the person hasn't changed, on the other hand i would also like to be able to notice if the guy does change. plus, there's a tiny possibility that i was mistaken when i was angry with that person, so if i'm deep into a grudge i won't be able to see it if the mistake is revealed. not to mention it would likely be much more deeply embarrassing.

in short, holding a grudge destroys your ability to assess the issue with any sort of neutrality. which could bring much regret. also it could be my Ne kicking in, disliking to restrict possibilities?