Gilly's Type Blog

[Gilly]

Hmmm...for some reason making it public helps me to be candid, I think. When I write things down and never let anybody read it, it feels more like digging it out of the trash only to sweep it under the rug, if that makes any sense. Having people read about my life feels like it really dissipates some tension.

[Ms. Kensington]

Hmmm...for some reason making it public helps me to be candid, I think. When I write things down and never let anybody read it, it feels more like digging it out of the trash only to sweep it under the rug, if that makes any sense. Having people read about my life feels like it really dissipates some tension.

extraverted?

[Phaedrus]

Based on the information presented in this thread so far (and forgetting everything that has been said in the past), ENFp or ENTp are the two most likely types.

[discojoe]

This is an interesting study in how long an ENTp can follow through with a commitment.

[Gilly]

This is an interesting study in how long an ENTp can follow through with a commitment.

That sounds like a challenge. Prepare to be wrong.

[Gilly]

Today I worked on the register at the coffee shop. I felt really energetic, almost antsy, and pretty upbeat and happy all day. I love working with girls, lol...I get to be the center of attention all the time and act like a total goon and no matter what I do it's hilarious. There's this really hot girl who I work with who I would love to hit on, and who I am pretty sure is into me, but she's only 17 I just feel weird when I flirt with girls that I know are younger than me. It doesn't feel right. Plus she's like...kindof strangely eager and it kills the fun when a girl is so open like that. I like to tease girls and get them to react a little; this girl almost seems like she would expect it/like it too much/something. Weird.

I still think IEI makes sense for the most part. Working on the register has given me a chance to interact with a lot of different people, and I think SEIs are just too friendly for me. I like people who have a little bit of a shell or something; I appreciate it when people are kind, but when they're just so open and out there and blah it's like there's nothing to them. Boring. I actually kind of like interacting with people who seem a little...I dunno, not so open. I like talking with people who don't seem like they are openly happy or want to be open, and trying to get a smile out of them. It's like a little reward or something, like I've cracked them open a little bit. Whatever.

Thinking back on my past, I think an Ni dominant type does make a good bit of sense. I am personable and can be very charming when prompted, but honestly most of the time I'm just too lazy or nervous to initiate contact with people or the outside world in general. By default I'll sit in my room with my computer or a book, or go on a bike ride by myself; I really do need some prompting to "get out in the world" or something. For most of my life I have been almost a total recluse, despite being the center of most of my various social groups; my sister once referred to me as "magnetic, yet elusive" when asked to describe me, and I think this describes my tendency to attract people and be charming when I want to be, but pretty much keep to myself when not "pulled" into the world by necessity or someone else's desire to be around me. I have said in the past that I don't appreciate being involved by others in something, but I do have a need for a sense of involvement with a group of friends, which I am usually not so good at forming but am good at "taking over," so to speak, and I certainly appreciate being gotten off my ass when I'm feeling down/lazy/depressed; only when I'm really depressed or feeling pissy do I openly reject "being included" intentionally.


Maybe more later.

[Gilly]

Some other tidbits: I typed INFP on my first Meyers-Briggs test, and the Russian Vilnius school people also VI'd me as IEI.

[UDP]

so when you beat off, is the girl riding you spunky and energetic and rough, or is the girl slower and steadier, a more consistent yet forceful ride?

[Mediator Kam]

so when you beat off, is the girl riding you spunky and energetic and rough, or is the girl slower and steadier, a more consistent yet forceful ride?

my mom told you to go take a cold shower.

[Gilly]

so when you beat off, is the girl riding you spunky and energetic and rough, or is the girl slower and steadier, a more consistent yet forceful ride?

Hmmmm...I dunno, I like both, lol. Mostly I want to get laid All I know is that I ABSOLUTELY don't want a dead fish.

[Gilly]

B&D you are the man.

I don't really think I'm gay. I'm just not sexually attracted to men, and I am to women. I don't really want any man to touch my weener or put theirs in my bum. I mean I'm not gonna lie, I've had "gay experiences" before (I got head from a guy when I was passed out drunk, and only woke up at the tail end of it; talk about awkward), but I dunno...girls give me boners and guys just don't Mostly I think I've over-identified with what other people say about me; it wouldn't be the only time that's happened.

Juju, good for you man I can imagine that it must take a lot of courage to do that. I wish you the best, and I think you will probably find out who your real friends are, which is as valuable as anything.

[Gilly]

7/9 Afternoon

Work was good today. I made a decent amount in tips. I serenaded an old lady and a 10-year-old girl with the Beatles while tending the register; the little girl's family took pictures of me, the old lady and her husband laughed, and a good time was had by all. I enjoy being entertaining, lol. I also love getting attention...lol.

I really want to bone this girl at my work, but she is only 17 and I feel weird talking to her. Plus today I think I surmised that she has a boyfriend (text message from "Brian" : "I miss you" ), and I'm not about to walk that path a second time.

I haven't been thinking much about my type, but at this point I think my choice between IEI and EIE has pretty much come to a standstill. I am probably Beta, definitely intuitive, probably ethical, probably an extrotim, and most likely irrational. Not sure where to go from there. I got an enneagram book in the mail today (as suggested by many of the people here who are knowledgeable in E types) and am going to read 3 and 4; if 3 really hits home I think it will be safe to go with EIE; if 4>3, then, well, I'll keep searching, I guess.

[marooned]

I'm thinking EIE as well... yet if Gilly announced tomorrow that he had a sudden revelation and now he *knows* he's ILE and it's all clear suddenly... I would start reconsidering it. I think I've at least decided he's not SLE and I think I'm pretty darn certain about that.

[jessica129]

IEI. For sure.

[UDP]

my mom told you to go take a cold shower.

Tell her I just took a medium shower.

[Gilly]

Morning Update

So esper sent me a link to an article she wrote with reference to Rick's analysis of intraverted and extraverted extrotims yesterday, and if what she talks about there really applies to Socionics, then I have to reconsider EIE and ILE more seriously. I still think it's worth something that I can see myself as both EIE and IEI, whereas in Alpha I could only see myself as ILE.


I'm beginning to think that the fixation with mass amounts of comfort that I have might just be an unhealthy result of Si PoLR. I mean, I am way more happy when I am out and about doing things and (unless I had my mind set on being lazy, in which case being out and about will make me miserable because I will be lamenting not having fulfilled my own original agenda, lol...there's the extrotim for ya, I guess), and even when I'm "satisfied" sitting around doing nothing, it always tends to take me into a downward spiral of reflection that turns into self-analysis that turns into shame and self-loathing depression, at which point I become paralyzed by feeling so inadequate and defective.

Another point for the identity triad, I think: I definitely identify with the idea of being ashamed of myself and feeling defective in some way; I deeply lament my apparent lack of ability to "be myself." I can be genuine and candid when I feel good, but most of the time I'm just not that...balanced. My personality depends ENTIRELY on my mood. ENTIRELY.

I have this weird lack of ability to believe that my mood can "change." When someone tries to comfort me or change my mood directly, it makes me want to throw shit at them and hide, like they are trying to deny me the right to invade my space. I like to wallow, lol, and nobody ever seems to think that's ok; they have to CHANGE me. However I am easy to passively influence, I think; if I have knowledge that someone is trying to change my mood, then I will go against them and retreat, whereas if I don't "see" them doing it, I think I am actually somewhat easy to satiate/make happy. That's part of why I get along SO well with my sister: being a little bouncy and positive is just part of who she is, so when I'm around her and I feel her energy it just naturally helps me, whereas her husband can be very upbeat and positive and happy, even moreso than she, but he has to sort of go against what seems to me to be his "real" emotional state in order to do so, and sometimes takes it a little over-the-top.

Another thing I have noticed about myself: once I "get going" on work, I can go and go and go and never really want to stop, but once I DO stop, I crash hard. Even after I've been working for 8 hours, if I've been active, I'm still "on" and ready to do something; it's like working fills my tank up instead of draining it. But once I'm done, I'm DONE As soon as I've switched the power off (which usually takes a little while to fully take effect, although it's easy for me to change my mindset), I'm done, and nobody is going to get me going again; no way.

[Mariano Rajoy]

Nice thread - interesting to read, but chances of the forum actually helping you to conclude your type search are slim.

[UDP]

Morning Update

So esper sent me a link to an article she wrote with reference to Rick's analysis of intraverted and extraverted extrotims yesterday, and if what she talks about there really applies to Socionics, then I have to reconsider EIE and ILE more seriously. I still think it's worth something that I can see myself as both EIE and IEI, whereas in Alpha I could only see myself as ILE.

Where is this article?[/quote]

[Gilly]

7/7 Part Deux

Worked at the book store today. Experienced my usual frustration at not having anything very active to do, and predictably I ended the work day in a bad mood. The differences between the two jobs, coffee shop and book store, have really helped me realize that I need physical activity out of my work; I can't just sit around all day and do brain shit. It makes me antsy and moody and pissy. Alphabetizing and cleaning books is just boring, even if I do enjoy reading and learning about literature, and there is nothing to compensate besides a discount on a mediocre selection of already-half-price books.


I've still been thinking about what Esper's article (http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...extrotims.html) said about introverted extrotims, although Stefani seems more like an IEI to me personally, and I think I could possibly be a case of an introverted extrotim. I'm on the fence between EIE and IEI today. Some noteworthy tension between myself and my employer today, whom I believe to be either ILI or SLI, and I met and had an easy time getting along with a new coworker, who is most likely LSI.