Quite frankly, it doesn't affect me either way. It's a bonus in life. I'm sure I could find people even if I was the ugliest motherfucker on the planet. I'd just have to lower my standards.
Sometimes I look in the mirror and go "hey there, good lookin'". Not really (I do sometimes admire my eyes though; the way they shine mystically in the sunlight reflecting off the mirror). My best friend actually does. He sometimes goes "damn! I'm good lookin'", or - worse - "Ez, I am really good looking".Do you actually feel attractive ? Or do you just acknowledge being attractive, while not feeling it ?
I've known ugly people to be socially masterful. I've known good looking people to be complete loners.Does it feel like being socially inadequate ? Does it improve your adequacy ?
I'm not that attractive.Do you feel like being the centre of attention ? Do you fear of being unnoticed or overly noticed ?
No way. I'm far from beautiful; in fact, I don't think anyone on this forum is beautiful, but I think there are a lot of attractive people here.Does being attractive and beautiful the same thing for you ?
That's a laughable concept.Does being attractive and good the same thing for you ?
No.Do you think being attractive renders others more friendly to you ? more hostile ?
No.Do you feel narcissistic ? self-effaced ?
Unperturbed.How do you feel when others compliment you about being attractive ?
No.Do you suffer your attractiveness ?
Flattered, actually. As a male, I'm supposed to make the advances. It's nice to see some forwardness in a woman.How do you feel when some dude/chick is making advances to you ?
I want to add something. I think a lot of people fear looking arrogant, so they hide the fact that they are attractive. This is a stupid technique. As I said, my best friend takes this idea on board, and he's well liked by a lot of people. Except he takes it too far.
I was hesitant to respond to this thread because I prefer not to discuss my likeness, or think too much of compliments. If I do get a compliment on my features I usually interpret it as a gesture of goodwill, but not necessarily as flattery.
I suppose it makes me feel secure, but I don't think I would be insecure if I was less attractive.
I am confident about myself, therefore I "feel" attractive.
I think it improves social adequacy in that I am accepted easily. What I say is received well.
Being noticed is not at the centre of my attention, normally. If I am the topic of a group, I usually defer to someone else.
I want it to be.
I want it to be.
Certanily more friendly, and studies have shown that attractive people "do better" in life, getting promotions easier, etc.
I don't want explicit attention drawn to my appearance, but benefits are lush.
I feel the need to change the topic or return the favor.
No.
Dude: No Thanks. Chick: Yes thanks, but not if someone important sees or if I am not attracted to her.
LII
that is what i was getting at. if there is an inescapable appropriation that is required in the act of understanding, this brings into question the validity of socionics in describing what is real, and hence stubborn contradictions that continue to plague me.
Last edited by Jimbean; 05-13-2008 at 07:35 PM. Reason: spelling
"Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure, than to take rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in the gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat."
--Theodore Roosevelt
"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."
-- Mark Twain
"Man who stand on hill with mouth open will wait long time for roast duck to drop in."
-- Confucius
I agree, this is a very stupid technique, and is merely a more indirect form of egotism. what the fuck is there to hide? if you're hot, you're hot. it's not cocky if it's true - and you can sense if it's true (confidence) not just by someone's looks, but by their whole presence.Originally Posted by Ezra
4w3-5w6-8w7
lmao, ok, I see what you mean.Originally Posted by Starfall
4w3-5w6-8w7
i like attractive women. i dislike attractive, haughty women. I don't like downhome sweethearts. bleh. so many types of women, too little substance or something. But don't listen to me, i will pretty much like any person even remotely outgoing.
asd
"There's no such thing as ugliness, only laziness"
<Crispy> what subt doesnt understand is that a healthy reaction to "FUCK YOU" is and not
LII
that is what i was getting at. if there is an inescapable appropriation that is required in the act of understanding, this brings into question the validity of socionics in describing what is real, and hence stubborn contradictions that continue to plague me.
I don't feel any different about myself although it does entitle be by societies standards to go out with hot women and be more picky.
I see hot women sometimes with the most ordinary looking guys and I think to myself, what the hell is she doing with him!.
If he was good looking I would say to myself, Ok good luck I hope it works out.
The whole 'looking good' culture of hot women and hot guys just makes me wonder what is happening to relationships. Are they just as superficial?
I mean obviously this is based towards the most extreme examples like the women who won't leave the house if it's raining or the guys that must have a well rated girl for a partner.
For me, the best relationships are where you can both wake up first thing in the morning and find each other just as attractive as any other time.
Hmm child bearing hips thats something very very rare now days.
5.1 ft 34B-24-36 is the perfect form in my opinion.
Her short stature makes her appear even more curvy than she is
but at the same time her body is toned.
*points at crazedtwat's....ahem...er...crazedrat's sig*
lol
SEE Unknown Subtype
6w7 sx/so
[21:29] hitta: idealism is just the gap between the thought of death
[21:29] hitta: and not dying
.
SEE Unknown Subtype
6w7 sx/so
[21:29] hitta: idealism is just the gap between the thought of death
[21:29] hitta: and not dying
.
And that's my cue to explain what "presence" means logically. It's the intentioned flow of energy from one function to its dual, which rivets everything around it.
Yes but it meant lots of drama, too. I would never marry someone outside of my own psychic domain... too much drama.
People ask why there are so many divorces nowadays, so many painful breakups? It's because you have so many traditionalists marrying adaptists, conservatives marrying liberals. The attraction is white hot in youth, but once the transcendent function emerges it breaks apart faster than magnets of the same pole.
Some people may find very tough to find a wife or a husband, because they're unable to be socially adequate to "candidates", and aren't competitive candidates themselves.
For now, nobody wants a partner who may be a danger for their reputation. So some people may find harder to find a mate, and others easier, because they know how to persuade others to be their partner.
But, it's not very bad if you don't find a mate, because then, your psyche will adapt to that lack, and you won't think of it as a lack anymore.
It's actually a way for society to defend itself against people who may potentially contribute to society in an evil manner. Theoretically, though.
I didn't think I'd reply to this post, because I don't tend to think of myself as "attractive" - more like "acceptably non-repulsive".
However, I did make a lot of money during my short stint as an exotic dancer, and to look at pictures of myself and compare them to societal norms leaves me with a semi-objective conclusion that my natural features are reasonably aesthetic (whew, was that oblique or what?).
I take very little time or concern for my appearance. I shampoo my hair, and that is all - I might brush it for job interviews. I do not wear any makeup, perfume, jewelry, heeled shoes, or synthetic fabrics. I don't pay attention to fashion, I have no idea what colors go with what season, and I have a "wear it 'til it stinks" attitude. I also do not shave (I just shaved my legs for the first time in 8 years last week, and I've been itching fiercely ever since - today it's finally not so bad).
But the core of this behavior isn't some radical moral stance - it's because I'm fucking hypersensitive. Creme rinse makes my hair feel slimy, and brushing it is irrelevant as my hair does whatever it wants anyway. I can *feel* makeup on my skin; perfumes (including in hair care products, deodorants, colognes, air fresheners, etc) bug the shit out of me and can even make my eyes water; jewelry sits on my skin and also bugs the shit out of me (I used to get a lot of stinkeye when I wore a wedding ring because I fiddled with it constantly, which here in the south is supposed to mean you're thinking of cheating on your spouse); uncomfortable and unstable footwear seems stupid to put myself through; and synthetic fabrics make my skin itch and/or sweat (even if I'm cold). As for shaving, I can feel the hairs growing back, and it's awful. (Fashion I've just taken the piss on, because after all the rest, I pretty much can't be bothered!)
The solution to almost all my problems is to simply not do the things that enervate me, so I come off as a hippie. It used to piss me off when people called me granola, but now I just don't give a shit.
All that being said, I think people do treat me as if I'm more attractive than average - and I think it has to do with bearing. Credit my parents or whatever, but I've always had enormous amounts of self-esteem.
I remember being told by a teenager who worked at my paintball field that she could never leave the house without makeup on, and I told her "it's easy - just don't put it on, and go out anyway!" She looked mortified and told me, "But you look good without it, so you can get away with it!" Well, the truth is, her face was far more symmetrical and pleasing in its natural features than mine, and she didn't even have acne, so her complex lay completely in the message she was giving herself. I wasn't "getting away with" anything!
SLIOriginally Posted by Charles Bukowski
Then, it means you're probably attractive.
The most attractive chicks shouldn't feel attractive, because otherwise, they wouldn't make efforts to appear attractive, and will appear less attractive. For the same reason, the smartest people feel dumb, and the strongest people feel weak.
I'm the same! I hate the feel of makeup on my skin and I only wear natural scents (like essential oils) because the standard perfumes irritate my eyes. I don't like the fake smell of them anyway. And if I wear a necklace I'm always picking it up and fiddling with it because I don't like the feel of it on my chest. And high heels - don't get me started. Why must we torture ourselves?? You might as well be in shackles - you can't run in them. Shaving I bear for appearance's sake .
"Language is the Rubicon that divides man from beast."
I agree with those who say it has more to do with how you carry yourself. Being married, you don't have to worry about getting hit on (for the most part) so it's safe and fun to be friendly and confident. Much easier to enjoy one's own attractiveness when you're not nervous about attracting the wrong sort.
The other thing I'll throw in here is that as you get older (middle-aged like me), putting a bit of work into your appearance doesn't mean you have negative self-esteem. It actually means the opposite.
IEI-Fe 4w3
To me it really doesn't matter as long as you aren't I don't know, completely butt-ugly. Serious! I'm not being sentimental or cheesy but it is SOOO the insides! If you are a perfect 10, but your insides are rotten- it's gonna make your outsides look very ugly to me. But if you are a 7, but a good soul- it's gonna make you be a 10 no doubt. Now okay there is a limit. If you are a 2 or 3, there isn't much you can do to raise that above the .... 5 or 6 level, but hey. God gives with one hand, you ugly sack of shit!
I am physically attractive, but I don't really think about it often. Honestly lol. Once in a great while I like to maybe look in the mirror at what a hot stud I am, but that shit gets boring if you do that more than twice a year. Even though I'm physically attractive, I don't have the physical coordination to go along with it so whatever.
It's more about 'personal energy' to me. I mean you can have somebody that looks superficially really nice but their inner core just lacks any sort of sexual appeal. Most gay porn stars are like this, sadly. A certain kind of chemistry can make you want to fuck even the ugly. I actually think SMELLS are more important. It's okay to be ugly but ugly and smelly. Ugh. The two seem to go hand in hand I guess.
If you over do it you either look uptight/too fake or you look like a complete and utter fucktoy that is only purpose is to be somebody's whore. Goes for any age range. You need to give a damn, but don't give a fuck.The other thing I'll throw in here is that as you get older (middle-aged like me), putting a bit of work into your appearance doesn't mean you have negative self-esteem.