I know this isn't at all the same, but I'm an ENFp female with an ISTp father, so I know how the types relate.

ISTps are awesome.

Seriously, I understand why my fellow ENFps would be confused by ISTp being our dual type. If I didn't have one in my family, I'd stick to fellow NFs, or go for NTs, due to similar interests, etc. But if you just interact with an ISTp long enough, being your usual self but not putting pressure on them, you start to notice a mind-boggling core similarity between the two of you. ISTps think totally differently (which keeps them from being boring, and let's face it...to ENFps, after a while, almost everyone becomes boring in a way), but somehow often arrive at the same conclusions as us ENFps. At least, that's what I've found. And that keeps conflict levels very low.

ISTps are soooo NOT cold-hearted. They're...detached, very logical, but also extremely loving and loyal. What Nicky said about paying attention to little things ISTps do is completely true. Sometimes it's almost funny. An ISTp will pay careful attention to any cues you give them, and if you don't directly ask for things, they seem to love anticipating your needs. That's how they show their love. I think they even get a kick out of it. Especially if you give them a true ENFp reaction, lol. And for an ENFp, it's great to have somebody else figure out what you need or want, especially if they figure it out before you do.

From what I've seen (okay ISTps, you can debate me on this one if I'm wrong), ISTps are terrified of rejection. When my dad was dating, he was hypersensitive to anything a woman did or said that might hint at her perceiving an inadequacy in him. Things like that could make him shut down, and more often than not, run away. I think that's why ENFps are so good for them. Usually we can't seem to help putting people at ease.

A problem could arise if you are (or come across as) a clingy, emotionally needy ENFp. Outwardly. Vocally. ISTps hate this, either because a) they worry about not being able to meet your needs and panic, or b) they resent being bogged down by emotional issues, which is enough to make their skin crawl. lol. I'm not sure if it's a or b, or both, but that commitment-phobic gene in them jumps right to the surface at that point. Self-preservation mode begins.

But oddly, ISTps like being there for somebody who needs them, and they aren't fully commitment-phobic. *blinks* Okay, maybe they are, but that doesn't mean they don't commit. The beauty of it is, ISTps have the ability to commit themselves, totally of their own free will, to another person. That's why the key to any kind of relationship with them is a lack of pressure. They hate pressure, and are at their worst when under it. It makes them rebel, or run.

I have a story for you as an example.

When my dad was in his early twenties, he married his highschool sweetheart. She was an ISFj. Everything was fine, until she kept on pressuring him to have kids, a house, and a white-picket fence. My dad didn't want to make all these plans, didn't want to willingly bring all sorts of messy, dreadful responsibility down on his head. So he divorced her and left her heart-broken. About two years later, he met my mother...whose type I'm usure of, but who was definitely a free-spirit. She already had a two-year-old daughter, but my dad took it in stride, since he wanted my mom. (To this day when questioned, he shrugs and says 'Well, the baby was part of the package. And she was cute.') My mom put no pressure on him, just had fun with him... and he was happy, loved my mom and big sister, and so stayed. Within three years he ended up with a house, and three kids, and didn't mind. It just happened, and he went with the flow. He never cheated, and was very loving and devoted to his family. I'm sure he grumbled from time to time about the responsibility, but ISTps are great at dealing with whatever comes their way. That doesn't mean they want to actively bring it to themselves. The future they can't handle. The present they can. Often with great humour.

I hope you ENFps are able to see the point of that story, lol. I find it to be very enlightening, myself. I think ENFps naturally have the carefree, low-pressure outlook on relationships that ISTps need. And obviously, vice-versa. I mean, come on ENFps...tell me you don't find yourself getting irritated or panicked when everyone around you gets clingy and emotionally possessive of you? We hate pressure, too. So it works.

*shrugs*