Originally Posted by
JuJu
I agree with this... A ENFp who doesn't want to give up on a ISTp who's 'fighting to keep distance' seems to be a pretty common relationship aftermath... I imagine that most ppl learn to deal with what you're talking about by themselves, through trial-and-error.
Like Cyclops said in another thread, I think that it's related to maturity as much as type--for both the ENFp and the ISTp. I'm too young to have witnessed this maturation in most of my friends--any of my friends haha--but I imagine that as ISTps mature, they fight less to keep that distance. ENFps let certain ppl drop more easily... Anyone have any perspective on this?
I had an experience last year where, after breaking up w/ a SLI, I tried to remain friends. It was the most tense damn thing, lol... Didn't last long either--after about a month, we said a bunch of mean things to each other then just let it drop... It sucked.
A few months ago, I found out that this ex is in trouble. I wrote a nice letter, hoping to help... As expected, never heard back--and honestly, I wonder if it did..? The thing is: I can just as easily imagine a nice letter making an unhealthy SLI feel tortured as good.
This situation probably isn't representative b/c the SLI in question hasn't been very healthy in awhile... Ppl go through phases, obviously. Maybe someone will relate to it though, who knows?