The most stress free relation

[implied]

ummmm dual? Duh.

lol yes.

[Slacker]

Yeah, really. This seems like an obvious thing.

[UDP]

I mean, what qualities does the person you have the most stress free relationship with - what qualities to they have, and why are they soothing to you.

[liveandletlive]

I mean, what qualities does the person you have the most stress free relationship with - what qualities to they have, and why are they soothing to you.

if you know anything about socionics you should be able to figure it out.

[UDP]

if you know anything about socionics you should be able to figure it out.

Obviously.

Now that I am asking people to actually confirm that their dual gives them the best psychological relation, they are hesitant to share stories. Go figure.

[aestrivex]

Now that I am asking people to actually confirm that their dual gives them the best psychological relation, they are hesitant to share stories. Go figure.

perhaps you haven't seen it:

http://www.the16types.info/vbulletin...ad.php?t=16845

[liveandletlive]

gosh niffweed ure such a flip-flopper!

[Cuddly McFluffles]

Two people immediately come to mind.

1st, my little sister, who is possibly ISFJ. She's giving, caring, and loving. She's melodramatic, which causes me to laugh at her. I know she doesn't appreciate that; she's just so funny. I do make fun of her moods, but I also reiterate that I do love her afterward. She's like, "I know". She has been known to hit or kick me, though. I think we get along so well because we're opposites. I like her calmness when it comes to affection (she doesn't bounce up and throw her arms around me), too. If I get onto her, it's generally for the way she expresses herself (she's gotta learn to not speak so forcefully when angry), because yelling does no good. She and my brother have been known to make food for us to try, and I believe she likes to cook. She and my grandmother (who, ironically, is the same temperament combination) are two people I feel close to and fine around.

2: My grandmother. She's an I__J in MB. We don't know the other 2 yet. She's my mentor, and we get along well (until she asks me to do certain chores). I respect her, but I know not to mess with her, either; I've heard her stories. Apparently, I've inherited some of her traits.

3: My best friend. I have no idea what type he was (he was in all likelihood Mel/Phleg or Phleg/Mel, aka C/S or S/C). We had very similar interests and fit together well; in fact, it was only later that I truly realized our stark differences in personality. He never could figure me out because I continually surprised him. He was very helpful, and he had a very amusing sense of humor. He was undoubtedly the calmer one, and more stable. He wrote and drew (not professionally). I'm fairly certain he is not my dual; I really think he's more N than S. I was greatly the dominant one in that friendship, though I have a hard time seeing it that way. I definitely had influence over him, but I think he was the stronger, more mature one.

4: Another friend. He's a __TP, whatever he is. He has a strong, active imagination and was good at sensing things but still managed to keep me pulled together. He definitely wore the pants in our friendship, and I was happy to let him; it meant less work for me. He was very helpful, and he took a lot from me; he did most of the cooking when we both lived at college, but occasionally he'd tell me it was my turn to do it. *shrugs* If he'd asserted himself more often, he would've had to cook less. He definitely took care of me, but that irritated me here and there - I have this thing about not viewing myself as helpless - and I would assert my independence every so often. We complemented each other a lot and consequently got on well together. Still, he had his glaring weaknesses, and so did I. They brought about the end of things.

[UDP]

Like for me, I just had a completely refreshing experience. I am working on teams in many situations, from classes to organizations. One of my teams is frequently making jokes, chatting, talking, making fun of the teacher. There are 5 people in this group. To me, they don't really focus on the work, and don't really seem concerned with the work. Just doing enough to get by. But nevertheless, the actual atmosphere of the group is more orientated towards making light of our "situation" - how hard the project is, how weird the teacher is, how vague things are, etc. Those moments are periodic but frequent.

In comparison, I just had a group experience, with one person. We just focused on the work. There was substantially less effort put into lightening the mood. There was talk of the teacher, but only in so far as related to the material. To me, it was an extremely calm situation, and I felt no pulls at being more aware of and catering to people's moods. Consequently, I was more relaxed, and, I made very small comments that were just a little funny and well received. (I made a few remarks in the other group, but that group seemed to have a greater emphasis on being cool, or being chill about things, so it was more.. saying things only when there was an obvious opportunity, or it seemed to fit in with my preferences for making remarks)

The second group, just working with the one person, was extremely refreshing. The focus was on the work itself, and it felt ..... professional? Maybe that word just makes sense because in comparison to the other group, it seemed much less like a bunch of 20 year old collegers talking about how to do some project. The person showed up, put effort into things ahead of time, it was really great. But in general, there was essentially an absence of psychological discomfort, and that is what I noticed most.