Originally Posted by
Emmym
Disclaimer: If the LSE is unhealthy or there's a huge age gap between us, obviously, the power dynamic is offset so much so that it's not a relationship I feel responsible for. I've known a few older, basically sociopathic LSEs and I couldn't care less how they feel or what they think. I'm only speaking about LSEs close to my age who aren't Ann Coulter levels of crazy.
Usually, with LSEs, I just listen. Which is unusual, because I feel like I usually end up doing too much talking around some other types, especially Te-ego introverts (unless they get really into explaining something). LIEs and LSEs both have the effect of making me basically silent, but with LSEs it's actually fun because it seems like they can say what I'm thinking and keep me engaged in the conversation. They know when to be practical, when to be funny, and when to shut up, lmao.
When they're upset, I usually just let them blow off steam while listening and agreeing, giving input if I think they missed something important. They can talk literally for hours about what's bothering them and I wouldn't mind. Even if I'm not TALKING for hours about something that hurts me, I'm usually thinking about it for days, lol, so I don't begrudge them the time they need to deal with it.
Something I noticed is that whereas an SLI might say something really unpalatable and get defensive when I point it out, an LSE will actually take a step back, examine what I mean when I said it was unpalatable (if they say something really ignorant or cruel, for example) and apologize or verbally change their mind. ("Okay, so I wouldn't ever REALLY @#$% a baby..." lol) It's semantic but at times it can be important. I'm not saying, "LSE, you're a terrible person," just gently reorienting them towards less offensive behavior or towards what they really mean to say, which may be, "People are having too many babies." If they disagree and want to push the issue, I'm not usually bothered. I've noticed that Ti egos push the issue warily, as if they're hurting me by doing so, implying that I'm a worthless idiot for disagreeing with them, lmao.