@littleredridinghood: yes i agree esp with the free will part. we definitely do have choices i did not mean to imply we do not.

i see what you mean about bad habits and going against the grain....any choices i have made have never felt at the time that i was going against the grain. at all. to the contrary, it's important to recognize when something feels like a force-fit and let these options go.

my understanding of this is more like a hindsight thing: when i look back over my choices and decisions, i see the meaning in them. i understand that God had put me on the road or path i am on....and i am driving the car on this path. :wink: