??
Are INFps habitual ass kissers?
??
No? A background story would be oh so swell.
Mmmm, ass. Yum. <3
I'd love some context. What brought this on?
Backstory:
I'm just reflecting on some experiences with IEI's. They tend to tell me, "oh I love those things. Oh I love those too!"
Zero conflict. This is a problem.
Better question:
do IEI's want to be liked by everyone?
People doesn't do what we want them to if they dislike us!Originally Posted by DJ Arendee
Is that it?
I got a lot of people kissing my ass. Its not exactly bad though... Kinda goes against my own code.
} Tell people what to do. if they don't do it, stop telling them what to do and find other people who will listen {
lmao
They only kiss your ass because they want Ninja skills. You have skills. So the real question is, why do IEIs want ninja skills???!!!???
Socionics -
the16types.info
This is tru. Maybe they want all their wildest dreams to come true.
But are these IEIs boys? You need wanna be Ninja women. Like Vietcong irregulars only with movie contracts and less politics. Find IEI women. Make them ninjas with movie gigs.
tumblr_mvb2i3TI001sotprvo1_1280.jpg
Does that woman want to be a ninja? Then she is IEI and needs to fall in love with DJA.
(I am kind of derailing this thread into reddit absurdity ... )
Last edited by Saberstorm; 10-28-2013 at 04:45 AM.
Socionics -
the16types.info
As the forum's only real IEI the answers to all of these questions is yes. Ignore everyone else. If they disagree it's just because they aren't IEI and they don't meet the criteria.
"[Scapegrace,] I don't know how anyone can stand such a sinister and mean individual as you." - Maritsa Darmandzhyan
Brought to you by socionix.com
Some IEIs probably do.
I know I personally kiss ass if I want something from someone, since being in their good graces is usually a pretty easy way to get that. Even if that something is just being liked, and I usually prefer to be liked than hated (duh). It makes doing things easier, as long as I don't have to give up a lot to be liked. Then I won't, that'd just defeat the whole point.
Being liked than hated is definitely easier. I can't stand it if I know I've got a whole lot of people against me. Then I get into a struggle between either pleasing those people who dislike me in order to dissolve the conflict or fight against them. The latter could probably end in physical violence, though. Fortunately school time is over and I'm not anymore forced to spend my time surrounded by such an amount of assholes.
I'm still a people pleaser, though. If someone asks me to do something, it's hard for me to say no. Especially if I know I'll disappoint someone or get him into trouble by not helping him/her.
I have to add whenever I stand up for myself - if it's something that is really agitating me - I start crying. It looks stupid. -__-
I don't suck up to people. If you mean that IEIs aren't scared off by your inappropriateness then that's because we can understand. I know that your question "should" be offensive, but I just find it hilarious that you don't understand IEIs (that aren't 9s anyway) and express it in such a way that it just becomes comedic. I can't take it seriously. It's sort of like when a small child says or asks something totally inappropriate that it just becomes funny, the question in it self may appropriately require an answer as the kid is trying to understand and learn new things, for example "You are old. When are you going to die?"
Monkeysphere - Best Cracked article ever.
_________
IEI's yield by nature. Most however, are Stand-offish and lack common skills like smalltalk.
Projection is ordinary. Person A projects at person B, hoping tovalidate something about person A by the response of person B. However, person B, not wanting to be an obejct of someone elses ego and guarding against existential terror constructs a personality which protects his ego and maintain a certain sense of a robust and real self that is different and separate from person A. Sadly, this robust and real self, cut off by defenses of character from the rest of the world, is quite vulnerable and fragile given that it is imaginary and propped up through external feed back. Person B is dimly aware of this and defends against it all the more, even desperately projecting his anxieties back onto person A, with the hope of shoring up his ego with salubrious validation. All of this happens without A or B acknowledging it, of course. Because to face up to it consciously is shocking, in that this is all anybody is doing or can do and it seems absurd when you realize how pathetic it is.
I think, I know what you mean.
For some time I was chatting with another IEI and he did that, too. He was constantly showering me with compliments. It kind of irritated me after a while. I mean, he was literally adoring me and thought I was something like the incarnation of his guardian angel, whatever... -__-
Something similar happened with a fellow student of mine. Both of them were putting me up on a pedestal.
I'm not aware of doing the same with other people. I feel uncomfortable though if I'm forced to critizise someone.
I'm sometimes not aware of my desire to have other people like me, I think. I am a bit of a people pleaser in many situations. This shouldn't be confused with me actually caring what other people think. It's more of a conflict avoidance strategy. Most people are better than I am at resolving conflicts in their favor, so I steer around those situations. I'm great sometimes at telling what someone's unspoken desires are, so it's easy for me to adapt very quickly and simply give them what they want. If that's ass kissing then so be it. I'm just a nice person occasionally, in my own opinion.
Actually, I wish I knew how that worked sometimes. How is it that I know what someone else wants when they simply express anger? That tends to be when that ability is most active. At least for me.
Lol I know which article you're talking about. I came across it when my first love SLE and I were in a love triangle with me at the losing end; I sent it to him hoping it would remind him how important I was to him; he reposted it on fb.
Ugh, how I hate myself for liking him.
I have to pretend for my job. It pushes me to my limits sometimes. And all those average people always get the feeling I don't have the character of a small townie, so they buy less stuff from me. Lol. Oh well.
Depends on my power level in regards to others, and how they will react. I don't really see myself as an asskisser compared to others at all.
Depends on my power level in regards to others, and how they will react. I don't really see myself as an asskisser compared to others at all. To me most of the other Fe types and even Fi types have their own asskissery brand. Stereotypical asskissers are ESE...
I don't think socially competent people have more of a tendency to "kiss ass". It's the case that when they do, they tend to stand out for being very good at it.
Not to put too fine a point on it, I wouldn't casually dismiss the idea that certain types aren't more prone to this kind of behaviour. Consider that you're less likely to do something if you're very bad at it, and more likely to do it if you can easily slip into the role. And considering that ass kissing is a way to supplement shortcomings in other areas, possibly combined with an awe of those who can effectively wield power, ass kissing may seem like a natural choice for a large swathe of people.
I would add as an addendum that ass kissing needn't be bound by good social skills. A lot of stereotypical ass kissers stand out for being very bad it.
I would like to add as a further addendum that I am in no way attempting to imply a strong correlation between good social skills and being an IEI (at least not in this post).
Would you please define what you mean as an "ass kisser" so that I may be able to think in terms of what I've observed and to see if there's a pattern?
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Dual type(as per tcaudilllg)
Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?
I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE
Best description of functions:
http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html
All about your bum is it? I see how it is. Backside too glorious. Magnificent bastard. Knack for spotting them socionical bum kissers. You get hierarchies of bums. Change your tastes. Kiss the quality bum. The art of bum kissing is engraved in the psychology of the chosen ones.
They have now been officially branded.
idk.. part of being socially competent is knowing when to kiss someone's ass. It's not really a choice, everyone has to do it irl. So I think it's not related to type as much as it is to maturity and real life experience level. The more mature you are, the more you see that it is necessary in certain situations, and the more experience you have, maybe you know to achieve your goal another way (probably bc you also have some capital to wield).
But when you see this in kids, i.e. a bright, well liked kid and a sullen quiet kid, then it's just social skills and not a question of maturity or experience. The 1st one has social skills > knows how to kiss ass > is well liked. 2nd one: doesn't have social skills > not sure how to kiss ass without looking stupid > ends up getting overlooked/possibly bullied > looks sullen to others/really is sullen bc he's being bullied.
I agree with you as far as holding back potentially clashing opinions. Almost everyone does that around their bosses *. I was thinking in terms of actively fawning over someone's ass.
* the exceptions I can think of may be type related: my LSI dad would almost never hold back his strong opinions on anything. He's gotten fired several times for his outspoken job-related and ideological opinions. Just throwing that out there.
Last edited by xerx; 11-10-2013 at 10:31 PM.
OMG, I adore the frankness around here.
[| NP | 3[6w5]8 so/sp | Type thread | My typing of forum members | Johari (Strengths) | Nohari (Weaknesses)
You know what? You're an individual, and that makes people nervous. And it's gonna keep making people nervous for the rest of your life. - Ole Golly from Harriet, the spy.
You think your'e the chosen one?
Chosen son?
Timely one?
you got nothing on this.
my rhymes is bliss.
my ass, you can kiss.
I've given a light peck to a few asses in my day. I either don't wanna deal with their shit so I just go along with it/try to show enthusiasm towards the stupid things that they like, or they feel bad so I'll feel bad if I make them feel badder when I don't laugh at the moronic thing that they apparently died laughing at, so I attempt to derive humor in it. The things I do for the people I can't be bothered with... -__-
I am not covered in thorns
nor am I covered in mold
https://soundcloud.com/#latitudes-official/latitudes-antechamber
I think insecure people tend to do it. I think it's a bit of a step to make a sweeping over-generalisation like all IEI's do it, it's like saying all SLE's get physically aggressive. I don't know that it is type related... an SLE recently is being ridiculously charming and full on; like layering it on; and it's quite offputting and is making me withdraw. It's definitely not insecurity on his part, I think he just genuinely thinks I'm cool/that we have an 'awesome connection'/are somehow going to end up together if he is persistent and charming enough lol. I don't think it's type related; I think some people think it's just charming or good social skills or that you really are this amazing person haha. I don't like the term kiss ass haha, but I will go out of my way to be especially charming of validating of someone, if our relationship is negative and it's upsetting or stressing me but equally and more likely I will take an arrogant, 'better than you are bitch' attitude to whoever is being rude and out of order for no good reason; "if someone hates you for no reason, you give that mother-fucker a reason". I think I actually would not do the former anymore or the latter even, and just be cool with it; definitely a confidence thing for me.
IEI, sp/sx 4w3.
...yes. Probably not the most out of all types, but they are..especially the girls. The girls like attention, especially from the opposite sex, they want to be popular. I've done some stupid shit in my life, stupid retarded shit..people dont understand what im doin because they dont know me, they back away from me...the iei follows suit. Iei never has my back, they've even laughed along with them in my face, but in private they secretly adore me.
Personally, no. Not even remotely.
I couldn't give a shit what people think about me; that isn't my concern. If I'm liked, great. If not, no seep shall be lost.
lmao dude that hasn't been my experience AT ALL! That's always been SEE IEE and EIE. In fact the only people who stand up for me in the face of opposing opinions have always been LSI, and IEI.
Fuck im too lazy to write a decent response. I agree, but disagree.
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