They think it's ok to steal shit and then get mad when you tell people they steal shit.
Oh, the thread title wasn't a question. ***s.
They think it's ok to steal shit and then get mad when you tell people they steal shit.
Oh, the thread title wasn't a question. ***s.
ILI (FINAL ANSWER)
I don't think this would bother me. I've never experienced it though.
This is me, too. I'm also not SLE though. Worst part of it, is that I never know when it's going to happen. I'll think I have everything under control, I'm cool, and nothing is going to bother me, and then some little thing will trigger this whole cascade of insecurities. I hate it. It's embarrassing. I try to hide it and control it as much as I can, but so far I haven't been able to.
@Starfall: a little reassurance goes a long way. For me, getting mad at me and yelling at me how stupid I am to doubt that I'm loved helps a ton, lol. I don't know if that would help your SLE.
Or in another words, they need Fe!
"Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure, than to take rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in the gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat."
--Theodore Roosevelt
"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."
-- Mark Twain
"Man who stand on hill with mouth open will wait long time for roast duck to drop in."
-- Confucius
I feel like this a lot too. If someone I'm in a relationship with doesn't reassure me on a constant basis, I'll just assume they dont care...in which case I also act out to try and get them to show they do...but then I realize no matter how many times someone says they care about me, I'll always doubt it..so I guess I'll always be unsatisfied.
PoLR is so cute.
Yes of course. Fi PoLR is not only not knowing how you feel let alone how others feel, so Fe shows them exactly how that person feels by showing emotional cues blatantly. ESTj's know exactly how I feel when I sit infront of them; they can read me very well, but ESTp's can't read me very well, but they are very good about giving me warm compliments and reassuring my will and strength and supporting me in a way that makes me feel good about who I am; I just can't be with them for other reason...you know!
You don't suck; stop putting yourself down like that; I generally really love being around my conflictors.
-
Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?
I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE
Best description of functions:
http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html
hahahahahahahhahaha
This is sooo freakin' familiar. Still working out my bf's type, but jeez, he's so funny about this.
Him: "Baby, one day you are going to stop looking at me like that, and I will know that you don't love me anymore."
Me: *Deep, dramatic sigh.* "Um, you can't go by that. How many times do I have to tell you I love you? How can I MAKE you believe it?"
Him: "Thank you. But ... last week you were in such a bad mood sometimes ..."
Me: "That doesn't mean I don't love you. It means I was worried about a whole lot of serious problems. I love you."
Him: "..."
Me: "I. Love. You. I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU. What can I say to get that through your stupid French head?"
Him: "I know you think you love me now, but--"
Me: "Don't make me kick your ass!!!!!" *holds up skinny fists* "Don't make me have to kill you!!!!!!!"
Him:
* One hour later it starts all over again ...*
- - - - - -
Jesus.
Ive learned to relax and just be normal around SLEs, I used to think they needed approval all the time, and to a large extent they do, but I figured that the reason this bothered me so much was because I wanted their approval too, a natural human reaction. Ive learned that they can take criticism surprisingly well due to their demonstrative function, not that criticizing them all the time is a good idea, I dont normally criticize people when its not necessary anyways, only in those cases where I feel it is necessary and needs to be said. Like I said I used to feel like I wasnt giving them enough approval and always wanted to give them more, but now I give them normal approval and realize they react just the same
sorry, double posted
yeah, I don't mind that quality at all. Most SLEs (at least females) I've interacted with, weren't... neurotic enough to pull the hyena cry for attention, but the tendency usually manifests in some way.
example: SLE-Se (also E3) waitress makes sure to address every person in a very specific way upon entering the restaurant, and gets unsettled if they don't reciprocate accordingly. I've experimented with the various responses, and usually reticence will make her seek out assurance in some other way.
another SLE I knew would indirectly make comments or ask questions pertaining to her attractiveness. It became frustrating at times, so I would usually just say, "why are you setting up questions" etc., but usually it was easy to work between the lines for a desired result.
They maintain a very strong control over concrete happenings; it's like they're worried that everything will spiral off if they don't constantly react. Giving an emotional undercurrent combined with a broader perspective on their and others' behaviors, just seems to really ease them.
i've never been with an SLE romantically, but i think i'd rather deal with those periodic outbursts of needy vulnerability than be with someone who is "silent". such outbursts to me, would seem like clear reassurances that they love me, and that they want me to love them back. i gladly pour all my affections onto someone that i love, but i need the same in return. if i don't get it, eventually i will feel exhausted and unappreciated, and i will leave.
Hmm... constant demonstrations of underlying emotional neediness. Bizarre. Doesn't make sense for SLEs (but yet does). Strrrrrngs explanation makes sense. "Tell me if you don't love me so I can fix it! Although I don't really know what concrete steps to take to fix it..." Yeah, I'd imagine that I'd like that too. It would feel reassuring, like, geez, you do like me, don't you. Enough to be obsessive about it.
Not a rule, just a trend.
IEI. Probably Fe subtype. Pretty sure I'm E4, sexual instinctual type, fairly confident that I'm a 3 wing now, so: IEI-Fe E4w3 sx/so. Considering 3w4 now, but pretty sure that 4 fits the best.
Yes 'a ma'am that's pretty music...
I am grateful for the mystery of the soul, because without it, there could be no contemplation, except of the mysteries of divinity, which are far more dangerous to get wrong.
oh wow. I'm the same way. it's humiliating honestly...i end up feeling way too vulnurable..however for me, it can't just be words of reassurance (though that helps), but actions as well. BUT this only happens in longterm relationships for me...otherwise like stated about SLEs, I won't care enough to make that emotional investment.
But, for a certainty, back then,
We loved so many, yet hated so much,
We hurt others and were hurt ourselves...
Yet even then, we ran like the wind,
Whilst our laughter echoed,
Under cerulean skies...
I have the same exact need to know that my partner still loves me and wants my affection, and I don't mind emotional outbursts related to that at all - I have them myself. In fact, I'm happy if my partner expresses her emotions to me in general, whatever they may be. It's infinitely better than a partner who hides her feelings, or who is unaffectionate. I like a partner I can have fun with and share myself with emotionally, it's difficult to do that with a partner who doesn't allow for emotions to govern an emotional relationship.
interesting...
I don't think I ever did it in that way. I used to be very tacitly possessive, and eventually just built up an emotional fortress to make sure I never had the lesser hand. That also backfired. Now I basically enter relationships with no expectations, a charming smile, and a pristine sword in the shadows. I think one should be prepared without being fearful or preemptive.
well, im sure its the difference between male/female SLE's, but mine isn't quite THAT bad, lulz. but i get the gist. its actually extremely accurate other than the end part.....
SLE gets home from work
"hey baby!"
"hiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!!! *stays busy with something*"
"miss you today...."
"missed you too love, gimme a second though...."
"psssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhh....*walks off like he doesn't care that he's not getting attention but its obvious he does*"
*finishes up*
*finds him*
*tackle*
him - *big grin* "thats more like it"
thats how mine usually goes lol
i more relate to your second little convo thing you posted starfall, definitely.
i find it pretty easy to give him the right attention though....
and with mine, its a lot like a baiting and hooking thing....hard to explain but, you can tell when he's feeling a bit insecure about something emotional (for some silly reason) and he'll be gruff about it and won't respond to me just lavishing affectionate words of reassurance...but if you just sorta look at him in a certain way and perhaps use some body language (this is the baiting) he'll come to ME and be a bit physically affectionate at which point i can make him feel secure with a few subtle words while he keeps his man-card intact.
he's a more laid-back sort of SLE....
does that make any sense?
SEE Unknown Subtype
6w7 sx/so
[21:29] hitta: idealism is just the gap between the thought of death
[21:29] hitta: and not dying
.
is it legal to randomly beat SLE?
i mean, lol, that works pretty well then you want them to understand something right quick, lol.
lol... betas are kind of reliable for simple bouts of catharsis
I like to burn brain cells.
The most annoying thing about them is that, when we hang out together, they feel the need to compete with me intellectually--a battle that I tend to win. Their response to this is usually to hit me the way girls do when you say something they don't like.
Basically, they can sense that I have intellectual "power" that threatens their dominance. They recognize that I can say things to make them look stupid, but at the same time am not a little pussy child the way LIIs are, so their Se kicks into gear and they try to either outwit me or make me look like some kind of lame nerd. If that doesn't work, then comes the half joking, half serious physical aggression, which I respond to with sharp Fi rebukes (I am good at that from watching my ESI teacher scream at people).
So I win, basically.
I don't mind so much when they do that because I am quite an affectionate person myself but sometimes, especially in the beginning of a relationship, I feel uncertain of whether I should show how much I like the person. So when SLEs act this way it's an excuse for me to reassure them by showing them how much I care and how awesome I think they are. Pouncing on them works nicely for this
Yes, this.
I noticed something interesting...
In SLE/IEI duality, the IEI feels the one 'on top' psychologically for the first time in his life. It's weird, but it seems to play out. I mean look at my dual interactions with me and Sean. I'm clearly the one in the most mental control, I'm clearly the cool headed one. Even though that the IEI is almost always perceived by society as being 'weak', 'emo', 'pussy' , 'unproductive, and 'useless.' When around an SLE though, the IEI isn't perceived at all like that. The IEI feels in control, manly and valuable. This is also translates to 'dual weirdness' and why duals ignore each other a lot 'in real life' and stay silent with each other so much, they really 'flip each other inside out' and their natural egoic roles ,as well as what the outside world thinks of them.
SEMI-DUAL also is like this. Dolphin never really views me as 'weak' , which is refreshing. And Illusionary can be like this is as well. Really any of the harmonizing/balancing interactions.
Exactly, IEIs have big hearts but they tend to be reserved from this quality, cause other people just don't really respect or need that. Other types are almost always going to be like 'stop being cute ******, can't you see I'm trying to be all productive here?' but the SLE really needs your compassionate heart so they don't emo-ishly cut themselves over something stupid. It's nice. =) (although IEIs are very laid back and can be depressed and very sad and grouchy I don't think they would ever resort to really hurting themselves, but an SLE actually does take those risks unfortunately)I don't mind so much when they do that because I am quite an affectionate person myself but sometimes, especially in the beginning of a relationship, I feel uncertain of whether I should show how much I like the person. So when SLEs act this way it's an excuse for me to reassure them by showing them how much I care and how awesome I think they are. Pouncing on them works nicely for this
huh, lol, there's this one mistake people are constantly making. That is also the definitive thing for IEIs... Proportions, that is... Y'know, harmonizing and all that. So, IEI cannot be always uber-friendly, just like SLE cannot be in-control of all the lands. Like that, bytch, And yeah! I mean those uber-controlling SEE, lol, they look like pussies to me. Like... oh, cut it off, you ****** drama-queen. Oh-my-gawd! I IZ GONNA KYL YAAHH!!!
That there is a constant demand on their part but a limited supply on mine.
Easy Day
True, I lived for two years with a supervisee lover, and I felt in charge from the outset. With the guy I'm dating now, I don't feel in charge. I feel like we are pretty evenly matched, checks/balances.
Even with my conflictor ex, in some ways I felt superior. From a material standpoint he held the cards, and I was the one who often had to bend to his will, but there were so many things about me that he could not fathom, whereas I understood him pretty well. He was a strict, orderly guy, and I was an all-over-the-place nutjob, so he never knew what was coming, and he was totally predictable.
LSI: “I still can’t figure out Pinterest.”
Me: “It’s just, like, idea boards.”
LSI: “I don’t have ideas.”