"Coming on too strong"

[strrrng]

I agree, Ezra. But there are also the hyper-active, emotionally-invasive, self-aggrandizing idiots who spew bullshit in everyone's faces to gratify their hollow self-images, and when spurned, rationalize it as their being "too intense and passionate" for others. That shit, I hate.

[kproj]

"Coming on too strong" is a sign of being too self-involved. "Passion" does not require throwing yourself into people's faces.

[strrrng]

"Coming on too strong" is a sign of being too self-involved. "Passion" does not require throwing yourself into people's faces.

That's the thing, though. The people who are that "self-involved" welcome such kind of behavior from others, because their underlying goal is some sort of involvement with another thing. It's a sense of intimacy, pretty much. Seeing someone else with similar drives is pretty enlivening. It tells me that I don't have to hold back with them, and that they are willing to go to the end, so to speak.

[thePirate]

That's the thing, though. The people who are that "self-involved" welcome such kind of behavior from others, because their underlying goal is some sort of involvement with another thing. It's a sense of intimacy, pretty much. Seeing someone else with similar drives is pretty enlivening. It tells me that I don't have to hold back with them, and that they are willing to go to the end, so to speak.

Thats not neccessarily true, I've seen plenty of cases where you have two 'self involved, passionate individuals' who didn't welcome the behavior from each other.

I would agree with FDG, in that you're probably just an asshole. I would usually just say coming off as one, but hey, you're SLE right? :tongue:

Notice the problem at hand is 'coming on too strong' not 'coming off too passionate'..

However, I must commend you for your exquisite rationalization of douchebaggery.

Kudos

[Gilly]

Wow, I really don't like you. Unless you prove you can do something other than make inflammatory remarks, I might actually ban you out of sheer spite.

[betterthan]

Thats not neccessarily true, I've seen plenty of cases where you have two 'self involved, passionate individuals' who didn't welcome the behavior from each other.

I would agree with FDG, in that you're probably just an asshole. I would usually just say coming off as one, but hey, you're SLE right? :tongue:

Notice the problem at hand is 'coming on too strong' not 'coming off too passionate'..

However, I must commend you for your exquisite rationalization of douchebaggery.

Kudos

Aha. Wow, because this doesn't make you a complete asshole yourself? Fail.

[thePirate]

Aha. Wow, because this doesn't make you a complete asshole yourself? Fail.

hahaha, where did I say I wasn't?

[betterthan]

hahaha, where did I say I wasn't?

Touche asshole. Ezra's not offended by them, you guys are just offended by Ezra hitting a passionless nerve.

^^

[kproj]

Agreed that "self-involved" can sometimes imply an admirable sense of drive.

I just don't think that people who have issue with others "coming on too strong" are necessarily spiritless or lifeless...rather, they don't want people with conflicting beliefs or desires wasting their time and energy. Ezra, taking offense to these kinds of people, doesn't seem to understand this concept.

Personally, I find people who have hidden passions, which they pursue independently, without regard to what other people think, to be much more interesting and attractive than people who feel compelled to impose their views on first contact with others.

...also, I think I'm probably chilling in the wrong quadra forum.

[redbaron]

Personally, I find people who have hidden passions, which they pursue independently, without regard to what other people think, to be much more interesting and attractive than people who feel compelled to impose their views on first contact with others.

I absolutely agree with this and with Ezra's original post. And I don't think Ezra was talking about imposing passions on others.

[JWC3]

is being attracted to people with passion a sterotypically beta thing?

[strrrng]

Thats not neccessarily true, I've seen plenty of cases where you have two 'self involved, passionate individuals' who didn't welcome the behavior from each other.

Possibly, but I think the reasons why they wouldn't welcome the behavior would be largely divergent from the reasons why a calm, placid person would reject an impassioned one.

I would agree with FDG, in that you're probably just an asshole. I would usually just say coming off as one, but hey, you're SLE right? :tongue:

Not really.

Notice the problem at hand is 'coming on too strong' not 'coming off too passionate'..

Yes, and the root of the problem is not whether one 'comes off' a certain way, but rather, the motivating mechanisms for why they come off the way they do (and to a lesser extent, why the recipient takes it the way they do). Which is why it doesn't matter if someone thinks another is coming off strong, because they could simply be misinterpreting/ascribing/ignoring the true motivations for that person's behavior. And thus:

However, I must commend you for your exquisite rationalization of douchebaggery.

You have dumbfuck comments like this, based on presumptuous judgments from people who can't come out of their myopic bubbles enough to appreciate personality differences.


And this petty retort:

hahaha, where did I say I wasn't?

only renders everything you said previously ironically self-stultifying. So...

Kudos

Indeed.