i'm interested in this ... usually i'm not that drawn to SEEs and most of the ones i know are female , but when i do, i feel like i have nothing to offer- i honestly do wonder if they are
really interested in Ni-doms? (especially IEIs with zero Te, all i can offer is nodding and smiling at people, especially if i don't know them well.) somehow i can't wrap my head around this. one female SEE who approached me for friendship told me she wishes she had a boyfriend like me. and i thought, wtf, why? i always thought that SEEs tolerate IEIs because they are non-threatening and tag along, that's it. but every SEE i know has at least one IEI in their circle of friends, my SEE aunt's most important romantic relationships have been an IEI and now an ILI (but ILIs have Te!). and i've seen enough SEEs dating EIEs and ILIs to know, yes, they are
drawn to Ni, but it's still strange for me. i met a really good looking, interesting SEE guy, and i was interested in him (but in a so/sx, let's see where it leads me way, i want to collect you as an addition to my social circle, and hopefully more?
... it's about social chemistry, i guess. he's sx/so, btw) and thought, okay, out of my league. so, what's their flirting/romantic behaviour, or how they act when they are interested in you (not necessarily romantic)? the SEE sx/so guy was always very enthusiastic, friendly towards me the few times we talked, him initiating the conversations. i thought that he's like that with everyone. i tried to be extra charming, lol. when i met him a few months later, i thought, it takes too much effort to keep this up, and maybe he doesn't remember me. so, i was more back to my default withdrawn mode i display with strangers.
he modified his behaviour based on my reactions, and was very quiet towards me, until i showed simple signs of interest, and then he would slowly approach me again based on my reactions. i thought aggressor's talk to you/pursue you/chase you, if they are interested and if not, they just don't. but what's up with this looking at you as if they are a cat watching a mouse until it makes a move. and if you don't do anything, they look confused and unsure. usually it's me doing that, waiting for someone to make the first move and then adapting to them and deciding whether i should make the second or not. lol.
waaay worse was an SLE around, who is the most attractive guy i've seen in my entire life, who just stared at me never saying anything. the first time i talked to him he got very nervous and tense... i'm not that attractive, either. wtf. ^^ what's up with aggressors not acting like aggressors. weird.