The reason that led me to socionics was my search for a psychological personality test, because I believed I didn't have a personality. As far as social-wise, I thought I was just extremely apathetic.
Anyways, the test results were extremely contradicting to my intentions. Socionics questions if Fe exists in us at all. I can now watch myself hopelessly left out of the emotional atmosphere, and this can make me upset. All I can do is listen, correlate, but never feel. I really feel schizoid now.
Maybe I've just been pushing myself to be social too much. It's summer break and a lot of friends have been hassling me, time alone is pretty rare.
What dumbfounds me is.. people like me. Despite of my lack of everything(personality wise), my uncompromising presence is appreciated and longed for. Hell, they may like me more than I like them. Why am I so cool? Or maybe they just like to talk? All I do is listen.. is that what everyone wants? The only things I like to talk about from my own mouth are Ti related, which I can easily keep to myself if I wish. Do people appreciate Ti or find it annoying? Also.. its like if I do talk about Ti, I see ESTJs hopelessly try to relate where their Ti is inferior, and just lie through loopholes in their fallible logic to appear like they know what they're talking about. It's pretty gay. I mean c'mon ESTJs, I know its your hidden agenda to be perfect and all, but you can't lie your way to it :]
I might be just really stressed out because I'm not chasing my master plan and instead more focused on fixing my achilles heal and dating.
I believe, the only true serenity for me is following my master plan which side-develops a healthy apathy for society. This healthy apathy keeps me sane when I'm around people... I'll finally feel happily detached. Can anyone validate?
INTJs, is there any advice you can give me about your mentality on people so I can just enjoy? I guess I'm just looking for some Identical Relations view on social life.