oh please don't be sorry.
(or is that me doing it again?)
i asked and you told. i'm here to learn from everyone's perspective, even if it hurts. and it did, but i'm ok with that.
there are other things that if someone told me to get off my ass and do it i wouldn't be able to either, so, i could relate in that way and switch it around on myself.
i don't actually mean for what you call "speeches" to be motivating anyone. i write them to motivate myself. if i don't say those things to myself, i end up typing here on the forum instead of getting up and working out myself. unfortunately, it doesn't work for me to say them to myself by myself. i'm too extraverted for that. i have to say them TO someone. is that selfish? it sounds like it. but i don't know another way that works for me or i don't know that i could wrap my brain around actually doing it and it working another way.
anyway, thank you for responding. i appreciate your thoughts about it.
oh, i do have ideas that inspire people, they just work with a type different than yours.