I have a family member who is INTJ and he is single, always searching for a partner. He has this combination of naivete about women/relationships and more than a bit of that NT critical ruthless edge. (and I say this being ENTP myself; kinda takes one to know one). I think this puts him at a disadvantage in romantic relationships. Mind you, at work he is quite strategic, and has many friends. Socially seems quite adept. It seems to be the intimacy issue that's hard for him. I've always thought a confident ESFJ female would be perfect for him. Someone who can not take his ruthlessness personally, who can do the right thing and draw the same from him, and yet lighten him up. Seems like there is a lot of this type around, too. If he could just soften that ruthless edge a bit, I think the naivete would be less of a problem.

I have no idea if this issue is one that alot of INTJ's struggle with or not, but it definitely fits my family member. What exactly is it about intimacy that might make it hard for some INTJ's?