Sx/So Obsession with 1:1 connection?

[Muddy]

You originally wrote about "wanting to become one with another person". Not the same thing as this.

Yeah I jumped the gun again again haha. I see how it works now.

[Airman]

There's so much misunderstanding amidst some good understanding on enneagram here.
SX is the drive to intimacy. Not necessarily sexual related, but intimacy.
SO is the drive to grouping.
SP is the drive to self-preserve (this includes eating, being healthy, and having enough money for that. It also includes sex since sex is self-preservation of one's genes and etc. and thus sometimes SP leads are mistaken for SX leads and vice-versa).

IME in these almost 20 years of Enneagram study and observation, SP first tends to value WORK a lot, or better said MONEY a lot, but not for the sake of showing off like an SO, or attracting someone like an SX lead, simply for being secure in knowing that if anything happens to his/her health there's going to be enough money to fix it and so to keep oneself alive.

SO leads are somewhat drawn to groups and work too, but for them the STATUS is much more important then the security and comfort that money can provide. They can be very showing-off of their wealth if their second instinct is SX. The place in society one occupies is here of central importance for them. If they cannot be rich at least having a job that they will try their best is of great importance since it is their link with Society in general.

SX leads are drawn to money basically to attract a partner. If SX/SO they can be somewhat unmotivated towards working unless they are highly recognized (which would satisfy their SO instinct) or they can, through their job, become intimate with some people (not necessarily for sexual relations, more often not, but the SX first is obviously much more motivated to work if he's got a job partner whom he may flirt with or at least to some extent 'feel' the person they're attracted to (like when someone bends over another person's desk and the perfume and pheromones and overall field of energy of the person is close to the SX lead).

[Olimpia]

IME in these almost 20 years of Enneagram study and observation, SP first tends to value WORK a lot, or better said MONEY a lot, but not for the sake of showing off like an SO, or attracting someone like an SX lead, simply for being secure in knowing that if anything happens to his/her health there's going to be enough money to fix it and so to keep oneself alive.

SO leads are somewhat drawn to groups and work too, but for them the STATUS is much more important then the security and comfort that money can provide. They can be very showing-off of their wealth if their second instinct is SX. The place in society one occupies is here of central importance for them. If they cannot be rich at least having a job that they will try their best is of great importance since it is their link with Society in general.

SX leads are drawn to money basically to attract a partner. If SX/SO they can be somewhat unmotivated towards working unless they are highly recognized (which would satisfy their SO instinct) or they can, through their job, become intimate with some people (not necessarily for sexual relations, more often not, but the SX first is obviously much more motivated to work if he's got a job partner whom he may flirt with or at least to some extent 'feel' the person they're attracted to (like when someone bends over another person's desk and the perfume and pheromones and overall field of energy of the person is close to the SX lead).

^ This is SPOT ON.

My SP/SO father is a workaholic (being E3 probably strengthens that tendency)...

Personally, I have recently been thinking about social class, where my family fits into; researched what cross-class marriages are like; how I can achieve the status that I desire without having to be a workaholic... >_<
(Being PoLR and SP blindspot, I naturally refrain from focusing on productivity and making money through that. The opposite to my LSE father, who basically chose a job with which he thought he could make the most amount of money with.)

So yes, as an SO lead I am concerned with Status – money itself is rather meaningless to me, but it can help with status stuff...

I find showing off status is more related to the Aristocracy of a type. Even though I am an Aristocratic type and value "not looking cheap", I've learned to play down my good living standards to some degree through the influence of my Democratic ESE mother, who was never a big "show-off" in that regard, even though she is also SO/SX. (She's had her moments, but they were short-lived.)

I am going way off-topic here...
But I have been wondering lately whether I should "show off" my status more, because I am tired of befriending people who are significantly lower in status, with whom I am not on the same wave-length because of that. I do not like to embarrass people; I feel like I would make certain people feel ashamed of their own status level, if they saw how I lived. So, I am prone to not inviting said people over, for the most part. I have done in it the past, with a few, but... I am growing more and more disinterested of doing so.

I have even thought about how I could meet more people who are on the same status level as myself, haha. Should I start wearing more prestige items, like certain pricey bags? Where should I go to meet those people?

I bet all of this sounds rather unimportant to non-SO leads...

[Airman]

My SP/SO father is a workaholic (being E3 probably strengthens that tendency)...

Personally, I have recently been thinking about social class, where my family fits into; researched what cross-class marriages are like; how I can achieve the status that I desire without having to be a workaholic... >_<
(Being PoLR and SP blindspot, I naturally refrain from focusing on productivity and making money through that. The opposite to my LSE father, who basically chose a job with which he thought he could make the most amount of money with.)

So yes, as an SO lead I am concerned with Status – money itself is rather meaningless to me, but it can help with status stuff...

I find showing off status is more related to the Aristocracy of a type. Even though I am an Aristocratic type and value "not looking cheap", I've learned to play down my good living standards to some degree through the influence of my Democratic ESE mother, who was never a big "show-off" in that regard, even though she is also SO/SX. (She's had her moments, but they were short-lived.)

I am going way off-topic here...
But I have been wondering lately whether I should "show off" my status more, because I am tired of befriending people who are significantly lower in status, with whom I am not on the same wave-length because of that. I do not like to embarrass people; I feel like I would make certain people feel ashamed of their own status level, if they saw how I lived. So, I am prone to not inviting said people over, for the most part. I have done in it the past, with a few, but... I am growing more and more disinterested of doing so.

I have even thought about how I could meet more people who are on the same status level as myself, haha. Should I start wearing more prestige items, like certain pricey bags? Where should I go to meet those people?

I bet all of this sounds rather unimportant to non-SO leads... [/spoiler]

No it doesn't sound inumportant at least to me because this is real life experience you're sharing.
For one thing, I am myself unmotivated for working even being LSE if it doesn't pay very well and I'm always trying new enterprises and changing jobs because of that. Basically what sucks in being LSE is that one is kind of obsessed with money, and concerned about it all the time. Being Aristocratic also increases this tendency but in Delta and Beta money means different things. I find SO leads very interesting in many ways, but their obsession with status in society is somewhat foolish for an SX lead who prefers not so much glamour but intensity when spending money, preferably in a romantic trip.
And the LSI typing below my avatar is a joke btw.