Lalala.
Lalala.
INFp
personally I'd just let it drift (unless he won't "just drift")... sounds like you're letting his indecisiveness ruin you're party. Don't... move on the better things and people who are sure they want you.Originally Posted by eliphalet
i wouldn't say that was typical entp behavior. but you never know.
i would not waste one more second on this guy, who, if he is an entp, has a long way to go to becoming a good boyfriend.
ILE
those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often
it's orobably best for both of you to end it. You'll be able to get over the thinking about it part and he'll learn a good life lesson about relationships and dedication and all that. After a bit maybe you'll even be able to renew a friendship with him if you want.
(just so you know I'm no expert in relationship matters by far )
are you over him? or do you still like him?
if youre over him, i think you should keep him as a friend (since you care about him and hes fun to be around)...but tell him that that's the only kind of relationship you want with him.
ISFp; SEI
rough... the situation sucks
It seems really weird that he would pursue you for so long, even when there wasn't much prospect of you being anything other than friends - I think for that reason, it would be good to keep him as an acquaintance. I don't know how that much that would cost you emotionally, but perhaps 10 years down the line, you may miss his little 'quirks' - maybe.
For me personally, I hold my own enemies in higher regard than people I don't know, which might sound weird - I have a feeling of a shared history . To forgive someone who has done bad things to you in the past, or to merely allow them in your presence is quite a grand gesture and speaks volumes - to continue to treat them as your adversary only causes the person to resent being there, and does not make them see the error of their ways - they'll continue as before. To give them the opportunity to act differently than in the past means they may become a better friend than someone who doesn't know your past, if that makes sense.
If you standby while his life is in apparent disarray things *may* change for the better - I don't think they are likely to get worse - I don't think he thinks you're a 'silly' person, although he has lied to you - it may be that he has trouble speaking openly about himself and finds you appealing because your a reflection of him, and you yourself may feel that your inner thoughts can't be taken seriously either *shrug* - maybe a bit too much wishful thinking there...but I'm surprised how quickly relationships can change for the better by taking the step of making your thoughts on the 'relationship' potential + your private fears + concern of the type of person he is, and how he is acted...its always possible it could deteriate, but it sounds your relationship is in the balance already - at a point of no return...so...
(I could just be talking rubbish).
I can imagine the best thing to do is tell him how you feel about him (from what you think you should). Tell him and make it clear to him that you just want to be friends with him, and then start being honest with him after that. For example, tell him how your sister feels about him.
I am no expert, but it sounds like he needs to wake up to reality, and if he is your friend, then you would help him do that.
Then again you might be better off not listening to us and come up with something on your own, that has always worked for me.
i don't think you guys can be just friends either until he is more mature or if you don't think it's odd if friends do the things you say you do with him.
I have seen the behavior before. What i've always thought is that it's not really a matter of real feelings or being manipulative, I think many times that their emotional state is volatile and has all of the quirks that come with that.
ditto... give it a year or two though and you could end up with a really good fuckbuddy. Deffinately needs a break to be taken though for both of you to regroup and reform your feelings into something a little more managable.Originally Posted by Ms. Kensington
fwiw i don't think you can ever really be friends with an ex. friendly, yes; friends, no. i stand by my original (unpopular) advice.
say, NEXT!!! lol
ILE
those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often
lolOriginally Posted by diamond8
also i think what I said still applies. I don't think asking if he wants to be friends will change his maturity level or whether you're ok with the way the friendship is now. However letting someone know what you're going to do is not a bad idea most of the time. But I'm INTj.
hey "eliphalet" who i dont know ...anyway yeah its better just to let go of him like i did with u know who...Hey she'll offer him some "super" fun...weehee...
ENFj Ni subtype 3w4
"And once you lose your way you have two choices. Find the person you used to be or lose that person completely"
formerly onetreehilluver
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Come on. He lies even when he doesn't "have" to lie. He doesn't think there is anything to it. Is that what you want?Originally Posted by eliphalet
, LIE, ENTj logical subtype, 8w9 sx/sp
Originally Posted by implied
If you're suspiscious enough of him to think that he might fake cry just to get you back, then it's probably not going to work out either way.
But, for a certainty, back then,
We loved so many, yet hated so much,
We hurt others and were hurt ourselves...
Yet even then, we ran like the wind,
Whilst our laughter echoed,
Under cerulean skies...
Good for you. I say compartmenatlise him then disband himOriginally Posted by eliphalet
ENFp (Unsure of Subtype)
"And the day came when the risk it took to remain closed in a bud became more painful than the risk it took to blossom." - Anaïs Nin
listen chick u know that ur not gonna let go just like i never doOriginally Posted by eliphalet
remember "super" cough cough
ENFj Ni subtype 3w4
"And once you lose your way you have two choices. Find the person you used to be or lose that person completely"
formerly onetreehilluver
hahahaha that's funny. true, but funny.Originally Posted by onetreehilluver
when you're ready to let him go, you'll let him go.
just remember, there's a thousand guys out there perfect for you. "NEXT!!!"
ILE
those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often
If he cries in front of you about you then it probably means he cares about you.....a lot. If he's crying about some other topic then they can be unrelated. To be honest I would be straight up with him...... more so than you ever have in the past. Maybe in an email.... and give him an ultimatum. Make him choose and stick to his choice. This will make him think very deeply about the subject and make a decision on it. I think all the hanging out with the ESFp was just to make you jealous....... which I guess didn't work.Originally Posted by eliphalet
THE WORST POSSIBLE THING YOU COULD DO WOULD BE TO IGNORE HIM!!!!! If you care about him at all do not do this.
yeah you've got to get his attention. shake things up a bit. be really like hello?? we need to talk?? heheheOriginally Posted by Suomea
ILE
those who are easily shocked.....should be shocked more often
Wow, that is shockingly shortsighted reasoning. If this guy is bawling his eyes out over you, and you don't even know whether or not you still like him enough to be with him, there is absolutely no chance of this relationship working out for the best of both of you in the long run.
But, for a certainty, back then,
We loved so many, yet hated so much,
We hurt others and were hurt ourselves...
Yet even then, we ran like the wind,
Whilst our laughter echoed,
Under cerulean skies...
.
I might have missed something somewhere, but when did you say he lied? I think I just read over it too fast or something.....
he's a guy, that's just understood when it comes to women... :wink:Originally Posted by Suomea
lol that's not what my third leg said :wink:Originally Posted by cracka
.
not just that... was calling her sisterOriginally Posted by Diana
waaaay too much drama in that relationship to even think about keeping it going. Next.