I hope this isn’t inappropriate; I was inspired by @siftings Typing Thread since the questions on it seemed so insightful to contemplate and interesting to sort through. I didn’t want to clog up the thread so thought I’d make my own. I’m unsure who decided these questions/topics but I have to say they are brilliant. Here are my answers; as always, any feedback welcome. I consider myself to be some sort of introvert and an ethical.


Personal concepts
1. What is beauty? What is love?
Awe inspiring and subjective; inciting deep inexplicable feelings. Personal aesthetic taste is beauty. Deep commitment, compassion, being emotionally supportive of another, finding joy and excitement at everything about them...that’s love.


2. What are your most important values?
Loyalty, compassion, creativity, hope.




3. Do you have any sort of spiritual/religious beliefs, and why do you hold (or don't) those beliefs in the first place?
I was Christened, and I do believe in a higher power in the world, and see the similarities in ideas between different religious dogma. I believe there are moral truths in the Bible, though it is mostly full of beautiful metaphors to try and explain to those of the past about the way the world and everything in it is. Religion and science I do think can be combined, different approaches to the same phenomenon. I came to these ideas by myself. Learning about religion and science in school and the teachers telling us that they can’t be reconciled I guess made me actively seek out common ground. I like to find connection in everything.




4. Opinion on war and militaries? What is power to you?
War terrifies me. However I am glad that we have military and there are those out there who will defend and protect us. Power to me is something that I lack - personal confidence and public presence. Enduring. It is willpower that doesn’t falter. Powerful people are listened to. They can use their words for manipulative ends or for defending.


Interests
5. What have you had long conversations about? What are your interests? Why?
I like to talk about history and mythology/folklore, art such as fiction, paintings, music. Things that stimulate my imagination and provide me with adventurous and/or idealised mental imagery, and to give me a sense of connectedness to the wider world, past and present. I also tend to have long conversations with others about their thoughts, feelings, what interesting has happened to them; though I mostly let them do the talking and I listen (while psychoanalysing lol).


6. Interested in health/medicine as a conversation topic? Are you focused on your body?
I am very squeamish about medical topics. I do have a blood phobia actually so that’s maybe why. Also I have known people who have gotten sick with various forms of cancer, wishing for their recovery and hoping for that to be so, yet unfortunately they died because of the disease. Health frightens me. That said, I worry if someone I know or even myself is sick; imagining worst case scenarios and alarming diagnosis.




7. What do you think of daily chores?
Um...must be done, part of routine. A duty but boring. It’s nice to zone out and travel elsewhere mentally if you can.




8. Books or films you liked? Recently read/watched or otherwise. Examples welcome.
I enjoy fantasy fiction. I’m currently reading The Name of the Wind by Patrick Rothfus; it’s been harrowing in places but overall gripping and just pure magic. A Song of Ice and Fire I devoured about 7 Summers ago, then watched Game of Thrones the series...I even joined Tumblr to follow themed blogs. At school further back in time (10 years ago) me and a few friends were obsessed with Twilight Saga. I’ll admit now it was corny but I LOVED vampire romances (and still do love...cringe). There was something compelling about the concept of a normal teen girl’s life suddenly becoming full of supernatural powers, adventures and romance.


9. What has made you cry? What has made you smile? Why?
When I’ve been anxious, feeling criticised or pushed around, believing I’m a failure, when embarrassed, stressed, tired, watching a bittersweet and harrowing scene, hearing about and imagining others misfortunes. I smile when relaxed around others, savouring each other’s company, at cute things like babies and bunnies, to be polite.


10. Where do you feel: at one with the environment/a sense of belonging?
When walking alone with my thoughts, taking in the picturesque scenery or visiting a historical venue I.e. castle...I admire the pure beauty, imagine the interactions and events that could have occurred there giving myself a little role of ‘detective’ trying to uncover the mysteries and truth of the place.


Evaluation & Behaviour
11. What have people seen as your weaknesses? What do you dislike about yourself?
People comment how quiet and shy I am, that I am ‘too nice’ and give people too many chances without standing up for myself or anything. I personally dislike how overwhelmed I can become in conflict or emotionally charged situations, how invisible I can be, how I am not making a meaningful impact on the world, my appearance I dislike.




12. What have people seen as your strengths? What do you like about yourself?
I’ve been told I am supportive and patient with others, seem to calm others down. Good literary skills even from young age, quick to pick up new skillS. I like my ability to keep on trying despite setbacks and for giving emotional support to others.


13. In what areas of your life would you like help?
I’d like help in how to dress nicely, stress busting tips to keep calm, self esteem, how to interact in a romantic setting, financial planning I.e saving,


14. Ever feel stuck in a rut? If yes, describe the causes and your reaction to it.
Yes. Because of being stagnant in a low paid high stress job. I detached from everything in life that gave me hope and motivation. I cried myself to sleep a lot. Though over the time period I resolved to myself that I would change my job and be in a better headspace. It’s taken about a year but I now am in a better paid job that is closer to home and workload wise is less hectic and more positive environment. So it worked.




People & Interactions
15. What qualities do you most like and dislike in other people? What types do you get along with?
I like loyalty, confidence, curiosity (a desire to grow as a person and be open minded), calmness/composure (like they have their baggage together and are non phased by any obstacles), helpfulness/support, encouraging, proactive. I dislike it when people are over critical of someone else’s efforts or when they act as if they are morally and intellectually superior
I.e ‘I’m right, you’re wrong. You’re bad and stupid for not thinking or feeling as I do’.


16. How do you feel about romance/sex? What qualities do you want in a partner?
Something I want but it panics me. Perhaps not type related though since I have never had a partner for dating or more. I do have fears that I am not worthy of romance and intimacy for some reason - so a partner that liked me as I am and let me know in clear terms that they did and that their feelings wouldn’t change.::I’d appreciate that. I would probably go better with a more confident proactive partner, I’d want them to be patient and considerate of my reservations, not seeing them as signs that I am fussy frigid or disinterested but as barriers that they can overcome with me together.




17. If you were to raise a child, what would be your main concerns, what measures would you take, and why?
I’d want them to be happy, safe and healthy most of all. I’d want to foster their imagination from a young age, most likely by reading to them and encouraging imaginary play. I’d also focus on emotionally supporting them. I think I’d find it so hard to scold them!


18. A friend makes a claim that clashes with your current beliefs. What is your inward and outward reaction?
I would go mute on the conversation, let them go off on their rant. Inwardly I may consider their opinion and weigh it against my own but would not feel compelled to challenge their belief. Each to their own. Depending on the context of the clash, such as clash of preferences vs values i would either stay close with someone or distance I.e. my friend likes fire, I like water. We stay friends and the difference of our preferences amuses me. My friend likes murder, I like reviving people. We grow apart since our MOs are incompatible. Lol extreme examples but the only way I could think of explaining.




19. Describe your relationship to society. How do you see people as a whole? What do you consider a prevalent social problem? Name one.
I want to find a meaningful place, my place in the world. I am invisible and on the fringes yet take deep interest in how people behave within theirselves and with each other in relationships. I’m a dryad on the forest fringes of society. I linger and observe, but will hide in my metaphorical tree if society tries to impose itself on my individuality. Social problem right now is too much arguing and ego one upping each other, not enough cooperation and altruism. Social media sadly gives us a shallow and fragile sense of esteem.




20. How do you choose your friends and how do you behave around them?
I don’t specifically choose friends? I guess I try to be on equal good terms with everyone and am open to be invited out by others, if I feel at ease and accepted around them. With my close friends and family I do share more of my private thoughts and emotions than when I am with acquaintances or colleagues.


21. How do you behave around strangers?
Polite, mostly trusting, little nervous but try to be cordial despite anxiety. If I am having a bad day with my social anxiety I will flat out avoid all strangers and feel threatened.