Relationships and Enneagram

[Dauphin]

I have realized that the only thing I really identify with in the sexual instinct is its connection to jealousy and possessiveness in relationships.
How much does one's enneatype and instinctual stacking truly determine one's behavior in relationships, whether romantic, sexual, unrequited, platonic, or otherwise?

[Sol]

How much does one's enneatype and instinctual stacking truly determine one's behavior in relationships, whether romantic, sexual, unrequited, platonic, or otherwise?

In the degree E-type influences emotions it should influence romantic relations and in some degree other behavior like sexual.

There was a table, which types do pairs more often. It's clear E-types have kind of IR - some types attract more than others.
It seems there is also a correlation between E-types and Jung's types. So you may look which E-types are more often among your duals - those seems may attract you more. In case those stats are correct.

The example.
The E-9 I know told about her past relations in a form. "I felt good and just fall in the relations with that boy. When I stoped to feel good - I ended those relations". What she said - she had no strong feelings to those boys, she was self-centered and described her romantic relations through emotional comfort common for E-9. Also she've said that those relations were more platonic, just kisses or alike. Well.. I do not understand how to be pair in teenager age, to be modern teenager can be such, but she said this.
The later her relations she described as the 1st her serious, where she had meaningful feelings. She described those relations like "He suits me in everything". Such she understands the love. And here we see same E-9 self-centered comfort seeking.
She said that avoided men for romances which could to press her. Even physicaly they should not look as able to do this. She's ESI, so mb partly described her N types preference. But also this reminds how E-9 avoid pressing on them, - emotional or other one. She said that is perceived as emotionally "cold" for that "serious" boy. Being base F it's strange. Probably that boy is Fe valued, but partly this may relate to E-9 trait to supress external emotionality, to hold it inside. Probably she may hold partly emotionally supressed and dismissal even in romantic situations. In case she has no deep and strong love, and her Fi emotionality is alien for that dude - it mb quite possible behavior and perception for E-9 in such situation.