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Thread: How to deal with immature ESIs? (Benefactor-Beneficiary INFj and INFp)

  1. #41
    Humanist Beautiful sky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by blackburry View Post
    Point out that she's blocking you from the group and tell her you've noticed she is being a huge bitch to you while the situation is occurring (as she might deny it later- I've noticed a trend in many ESIs that they like to play dumb to get away with things...it's incredibly disturbing).
    Make sure to be very specific about her words and actions.
    I've noticed that too

    Isn't that lying

    Quote Originally Posted by Enoch View Post
    In the Toltec framework, there is such a thing known as the Petty Tyrant-

    I'd offer that you read The Second Ring of Power - Carlos Castaneda

    Life places us in with tough people at times who represent the predatory aspect to human nature; in so that life always finds a way in, or a way of molding us and shaping us

    But not everything is cosmic; you could perform any spiritual/social maneuver that has the end result you need

    It 'seems' socionics takes a stance on obtaining a kind of leverage regarding the hidden agenda, sounds like NLP or rapport techniques,

    toying with the target's subconscious and even unconscious

    You also don't have to fly at people's altitudes, even Andrew W.K. claimed talking to a person you have the problem with, was his answer

    If I were evil I'd prescribe that you work 5+ years in retail, you'll see firsthand the depth of that rabbit-hole, regarding people
    I love these literature recommendations
    -
    Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
    Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?


    I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE

    Best description of functions:
    http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html

  2. #42
    both sides, now wacey's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maritsa View Post
    She's two years old

    I recommended baby sign language and we'll see how that goes
    She gets emotional at odd moments and doesn't know how to get over it unlike her brother who shifted emotions quickly. She goes into a tantrum. She's perfectly calm around me but my sister's Fe makes her explode
    What? you don't give two year olds a little back hand when its needed?

  3. #43
    Adam Strange's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wacey View Post
    What? you don't give two year olds a little back hand when its needed?
    Hi, wacey.
    Hitting is not allowed. For one thing, it represents a failure of the imagination of the parents to find a more appropriate method of correcting behavior, and what is worse, it teaches the kid that using violence to get what you want is OK, and so creates more ENTJ's, and Lord knows, the world probably has enough of them as it is.
    At least, that's how it worked for me.

  4. #44
    both sides, now wacey's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam Strange View Post
    Hi, wacey.
    Hitting is not allowed. For one thing, it represents a failure of the imagination of the parents to find a more appropriate method of correcting behavior, and what is worse, it teaches the kid that using violence to get what you want is OK, and so creates more ENTJ's, and Lord knows, the world probably has enough of them as it is.
    At least, that's how it worked for me.
    I guess sarcasm is not lost on Strange.

  5. #45
    Adam Strange's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by wacey View Post
    I guess sarcasm is not lost on Strange.
    My apologies, wacey. Sometimes sarcasm is lost on me. Never in person, though!

    But, my inability to judge subtleties aside, hitting kids (or spouses) really is an important topic to me. When my ex and I learned she was pregnant, we started talking about how to raise our little Biff (placeholder name). Because this was the way I was raised, I said, We've go to hit the kids. Otherwise, they won't obey. She said, We're not hitting the kid. I said, You don't understand, it you don't hit the kid, they will do bad things. She said, We're not hitting the kid.
    At this point, I mentally reviewed the way my family had turned out, and compared it to the way her family had turned out, and decided We're not hitting the kid. Which was very challenging to put into practice, because we had to go to a lot of extra effort to guide him toward good behavior, using "consequences" and "patience" and "hoping that the kid is smart enough to draw the correct conclusions from this". In other words, treating the kid like an adult.
    It must have worked. He's not been in jail yet, which beats my record.

    Violence just teaches people to be violent.
    Little by little, we improve.
    Last edited by Adam Strange; 10-25-2015 at 01:43 PM.

  6. #46
    both sides, now wacey's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Adam Strange View Post
    My apologies, wacey. Sometimes sarcasm is lost on me. Never in person, though!

    But, my inability to judge subtleties aside, hitting kids (or spouses) really is an important topic to me. When my ex and I learned she was pregnant, we started talking about how to raise our little Biff (placeholder name). Because this was the way I was raised, I said, We've go to hit the kids. Otherwise, they won't obey. She said, We're not hitting the kid. I said, You don't understand, it you don't hit the kid, they will do bad things. She said, We're not hitting the kid.
    At this point, I mentally reviewed the way my family had turned out, and compared it to the way her family had turned out, and decided We're not hitting the kid. Which was very challenging to put into practice, because we had to go to a lot of extra effort to guide him toward good behavior, using "consequences" and "patience" and "hoping that the kid is smart enough to draw the correct conclusions from this". In other words, treating the kid like an adult.
    It must have worked. He's not been in jail yet, which beats my record.

    Violence just teaches people to be violent.
    Little by little, we improve.
    Fair enough.

  7. #47
    &papu silke's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Deer Woman View Post
    [X from school]

    Next class I came in 5 minutes later (very close to class start). I saw she is sitting where I was sitting.
    Her: Sorry I stole your seat. I hope that's okay!
    Me: No worries. (I really don't care. It's a seat.)
    At the end of the class, I said goodbye, she looked at me, didn't say anything and walked out.

    Class after that
    Her: Oh look...I'm in your seat...again.
    Me: Umm okay. (kind of weirded out)
    Then her and the person on her right turn to each other and start laughing.
    Quote Originally Posted by silke View Post
    that's interesting Mystery was doing the very same seat stealing gig in one of his presentations (i had him down as ESI)
    it's approx @25+ mins https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TWfSf1SMGi4
    Here's a video of another Se-creative, Putin (LSI), doing the same thing to Erdogan. This was after Turkey has downed one of the Russian planes resulting in the death of the pilot, so Putin is visibly irked with him.


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