Hey all! My name's Savannah and I'm a 19 year old college student. I've recently become interested in all of this and discovered that I'm an INTJ, which I suppose is rare for females. I've loved reading about others like me in order to better understand why I've always functioned the way I have. I used to think something was wrong with me since I was so terrible at relationships-- particularly female friendships, although also definitely romantic relationships. It takes a very special type of person to really connect with me and be able to sustain any type of long term relationship. I can be brash, unsympathetic, and frankly a bit socially clueless at times. My best friend now (who is female, I believe she's an ENFP but I'm not entirely sure) affectionately refers to me as a "female tool".
When it comes to dating,etc, I'm really quite a bit inept. Men are put off by my brutal honesty and inability to flirt or make small talk. I'm horrible at knowing what to say, find cheesy compliments and other traditional flirtatious rituals sickening and annoying, and generally fail at giving any impression of interest in someone at first. It takes a persistent guy to get me to even make time to talk or hang out. I also happen to be very passionate about my sport (I'm training in Mixed Martial Arts), and while that earns me a lot of male friends it can certainly deter a lot of would-be suitors.
I'd just be really interested in hearing stories from other INTJ females or people who are/have been close to an INTJ girl. What problems have you encountered in your various relationships? I've read that we're easily misunderstood, so how have you overcome the initial impressions in order to really connect with others? Or for those who know/are close to an INTJ female, what is it that you like or dislike about them, wish they could do better in the relationship, etc? Any thoughts would be valuable to my research on the subject. Thanks for reading and I look forward to the responses!