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Thread: Cat Recipes

  1. #1
    Korpsy Knievel's Avatar
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    Default Cat Recipes

    This thread is for sharing cat recipes. Here's one I found today:

    BEER CAT

    1 skinned and washed cat, cut into pieces
    1 can cream of mushroom soup
    1 cube of beef bouillon
    1 clove of garlic
    1 bottle of Guinness stout

    Cover and soak cat parts in salt water for 12 hours. Drain water and rinse the cat pieces, then marinate them in beer for 6 hours. Drain and place in crock pot. Peel and chop garlic, then dissolve bouillon cube in one cup of boiling water. Mix both with canned soup before pouring over the cat. If you start to slow cook your cat in the morning you'll have finely cooked feline in time for supper.

    Alternately, if a crock pot is unavailable a conventional oven can be used. Place the cat in an uncovered casserole dish and cover it with the mixture of canned soup, bouillon, and garlic. Bake at 375F for 1.5 hours.

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    Mermaid with Stellar views SyrupDeGem's Avatar
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    This is not what i meant by leaving the seasoning out korpsy. *tuts*

    Now this is a story all about how, my type got changed, turned upside down. Just wait for a minute and watch chatbox right there, & I'll tell how Gem became the moderator with blue hair.

    In typology central friended and praised, on the picture thread was where she spent most her days. Chilling out, selfies, relaxing all cool, And all typing some people and getting them schooled.

    When a couple of girls who were up to no good, Started annoying her & her friends in the forumhood, She got in one little flame war & got pissed off & said 'I'm moving in with that exboyfriend in the forum with the socionics toffs.

    So Gem pulls up to the forum for a year without being a hater, And yells to typocentral 'Yo creeps! Smell Ya later', Became a mod in her kingdom she was finally there, To sit on her throne as the mod with blue hair.

    InvisibruJim

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    Korpsy Knievel's Avatar
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    It's news to me that you'd ever said such a thing.

    Edit: My mistake, I just saw your statement.


    Wow, this sounds good:

    Chat Braisé

    Ingredients:

    • 1 cat cut in serving-sized pieces dusted in flour with salt and pepper
    • 1/4 c. extra virgin olive oil
    • 6 artichokes
    • 2 1/4" thick slices of slab bacon, diced
    • 1 small sweet onion, diced
    • 4 cloves garlic, minced
    • 1 carrot, diced
    • 1 lemon
    • 3 small tomatoes, peeled, seeded, and diced
    • 1/2 c. dry white wine
    • 2-4 c. homemade chicken broth
    • garni of 4 flat parsley stems, 6 leafy thyme branches, 1 bay leaf tied up with kitchen twine Salt and pepper
    • 1/4 c chopped flat-leaf parsley (optional)


    Preparation:

    1. Snap the leaves off the artichokes until only the tender inner leaves remain. Snap off the stem. Trim the remaining green bits from the bottom of the artichoke, and cut off the inner leaves in a bunch at the point where they are very tender. Pare the tough green outer layer off the remaining stem, pairing the stem into a point. Now cut the artichoke bottom into quarters and remove the choke with a sharp knife from each quarter. Rinse to remove any traces of foin ("hay") and drop them into a bowl of water acidulated with the juice of half a lemon.
    2. Heat 2 T olive oil in a large heavy casserole or Dutch oven. Dredge the cat pieces in seasoned flour, shaking off excess. Brown over medium heat, turning regularly, until golden on all sides. Remove cat pieces to a plate and dump any oil remaining in the pan. Add 1 T of the remaining oil and the bacon dice. (Omit bacon if you only have access to the thin-sliced vacuum packed supermarket variety.) Sauté until cooked but not "crisp". Add the remaining T of oil and the onion and carrot. Saute for 5 minutes, then add the artichoke quarters and the garlic, stir one minute, and add the tomatoes and the white wine. Turn up the heat and reduce until syrupy, stirring constantly, for about 5 minutes. Lay the bouquet garni on top of the vegetables. Arrange the cat pieces on top, together with any juice accumulated in the plate.
    3. Pour in enough broth to come halfway up the sides of the cat pieces. Cover and bring to a simmer. Continue to simmer over very low heat about 1 hour or cook in the oven at 350 degrees for the same amount of time. The cat should be just tender and part readily from the bone. Don't overcook or it will become dry. Check the liquid level frequently and add more broth if necessary. Turn the cat pieces once.
    4. When done, remove the cat pieces to a warm platter and arrange the vegetables, removed with a slotted spoon, around them. Cover and keep warm. Strain the remaining pan juices into a smaller saucepan and reduce over high heat, skimming frequently, until reduced by 1/3. Pour over the platter and serve immediately. Sprinkle with finely chopped flat-leaf parsley if you like.



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    Thank you k0rpsy. Now I know what to do with cats.




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    Korpsy Knievel's Avatar
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    Here's a great summer treat:

    BEER CAN CAT

    • 1 Cat
    • 1 Can of beer (any brand)
    • 1 tsp garlic powder
    • 1 tsp onion powder
    • 1 tsp salt
    • 1 tsp ground pepper
    • 1/2 tsp chili powder


    Mix spices and rub over cat. Drink half the can of beer and then place beer can into rear of cat and stand cat tripod-like on BBQ. Rotate in 30 minutes. Cook for a total of one hour.


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    A dusty and dreadful charade. Scapegrace's Avatar
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    Yes!

    In La Quebrada, a small Peruvian farming town south of Lima, they hold La Festival Gastronomico del Gato (the Gastronomic Festival of the Cat) on September 21. This festival is allegedly a commemoration of the original settlers, slaves, who once had to survive only on cat meat. Many of those black slaves had been brought to Peru to work on cotton plantations. The festival is also part of a celebration for Santa Efigenia, the town's patron saint.

    The cats for the festival are supposed to come from special nurseries though some do allege cats may have been taken off the streets. About 100 cats are eaten at the festival, prepared in a wide variety of recipes such as Cat Stew, Milanese of Cat, and Grilled Cat with Huacatay. It is also claimed that cat meat helps respiratory problems and acts as an aphrodisiac. Forget oysters, go eat Fluffy.

    http://passionatefoodie.blogspot.com...-del-gato.html

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    Olde timey eatin' cats:

    "Roast Cat as It Should Be Prepared" from Ruperto de Nola, Libro de Cozina, 1529:

    Take a cat that should be plump: and cut its throat, and once it is dead cut off its head, and throw it away for this is not to be eaten; for it is said that he who eats the brains will lose his own sense and judgement. Then skin it very cleanly, and open it and clean it well; and then wrap it in a clean linen cloth and bury it in the earth where it should remain for a day and a night; then take it out and put it on a spit; and roast it over the fire, and when beginning to roast, baste it with good garlic and oil, and when you are finished basting it, beat it well with a green branch; and this should be done until it is well roasted, basting and beating; and when it is roasted carve it as if it were rabbit or kid and put it on a large plate; and take the garlic with oil mixed with good broth so that it is coarse, and pour it over the cat and you can eat it for it is a good dish.

    And:

    http://www.foodhistory.com/foodnotes...r/memories/01/

    "One day one of the negro guards asked if there were any Caroline County, Virginia, men in our party. My comrade called me up to see the negro. I recognized him as a former slave belonging to my friend and neighbor, Mr. Will Lightfoot, of Port Royal. The darky was very polite and after some conversation he said, "'Deed, Marse Tom, wish I could help you, but de boss men dey watchin' close." I said: "You can help us if you want to and no one will find you out." "How's dat, Boss?" "Well," I said,"I see over there at the officers quarters a large fat cat. I want you to get that cat, kill and dress it and bring it to me when you come on guard, and I will give you $5." I knew, as our quarters were small, it would be impossible for me to kill and dress the cat without being caught by the guard officers, so I got the darky to do the work. A few days after this interview this negro was on guard, and sure enough he brought me the cat all ready for cooking, and I do tell you that cat was no kitten. It was not too large to boil in our old tin coffee boiler we had brought from Fort Delaware with us, and I want right here, comrade, to add my testimony to yours, that cat meat to starving men is a delicious delicacy. Yet I would not care for it now. Well, comrades McGrady, Akers, Rowlett, Captain Frazier and myself did enjoy that cat stew. I remember how our men would purchase rats from whose we could catch them, and I always envied the millionaires of our party who had green backs and could indulge in luxuries of dainty rat stews and fries. I expended my green back fortune, $5, on the cat purchase from the negro guard. People who read this letter, comrade, will no doubt say it is exaggeration, but God knows I tell the truth."

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    Cat and Lentil Soup

    Ingredients:

    • 1 cat
    • 1 bag of red lentils
    • 50g shredded ginger
    • 1 lemon (squeezed)
    • 1 bottle sherry.


    Dice meat into small cubes and soak in sherry to flavor it. Simmer lentils for 40 minutes and add the cat meat along with the ginger and lemon juice. Allow to simmer for at least one more hour.

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    Félin a la Cocotte

    Ingredients:

    • 2 good-sized cats, quartered, ribs, shanks and heads discarded
    • 6 slices of bacon, thick-cut, cut in thirds
    • 4 cloves of garlic, 2 minced, two whole
    • 2 cups sliced onions
    • 3 tablespoons flour
    • 1 cup beef broth (or cat broth, if you have it)
    • 1/2 cup red wine
    • Fresh thyme
    • Bay leaf
    • Heavy cream
    • Fresh parsley (for color)
    • Salt and pepper to taste


    Preparation:

    1. In a large skillet, cook bacon until done. Remove bacon and reserve.
    2. In the bacon fat, saute onions and minced garlic
    3. Add quartered cat, sprinkled with salt and pepper, and saute over medium heat, turning once to get a good sear on both sides.
    4. Sprinkle on the flour and continue cooking until cat browns, then add cat broth, red wine, fresh thyme (stripped from stem), garlic cloves and bay leaf.
    5. Cover and simmer over low heat for two hours, adding more broth if necessary and drinking whatever wine is left in the bottle. Mount with heavy cream and add reserved bacon. Salt and pepper to taste. Serve over buttered noodles or potato cakes. Add parsley sprigs for color.

  11. #11
    :popcorn: Capitalist Pig's Avatar
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    WHO KNEW PUSSY WAS SO DELICIOUS

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    Killer of DJA's Fun fen's Avatar
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    No thanks.
    And I would hide my face in you and you would hide your face in me, and nobody would ever see us any more.


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    Quote Originally Posted by Capitalist Pig View Post
    WHO KNEW PUSSY WAS SO DELICIOUS
    Audience groans.

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    Korpsy Knievel's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Capitalist Pig View Post
    WHO KNEW PUSSY WAS SO DELICIOUS
    Let's go through the member list and enumerate likely candidates.

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    I used to have a feral cat that would kill 1 or 2 small creatures a day. Even still there wasn't much good eating on her, she was skinny as.



    According to the Beebeesee they are better than poison, road accidents or collisions with buildings. Who would have thought?

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    Decadent Charlatan Aquagraph's Avatar
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    CTRL + F :semen. = 0/0
    “I tell you, freedom and human rights in America are doomed. The U.S. government will lead the American people in — and the West in general — into an unbearable hell and a choking life. - Osama bin Laden

  17. #17
    Korpsy Knievel's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fireyed View Post
    Fuck you, korp.
    One of my friends says he keeps his dog, cats, and fish in line by reminding them frequently that he has no qualms about eating any of them. Being who he is it's possible he's said the same to his wife and daughter too.

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