Originally Posted by
Gilly
Most people seem set that I am either EIE or SLE so I will do LSI and IEI.
LSIs are needy as hell, they always seem to be putting out little fish hooks for Fe, like trying to prod me or talk to me and get some kind of response. It's really kind of cute, even the guys, because it shows how they really just want to be friends, have someone to play and joke around with and make life a little more fun, and it's totally cool and OK because most of them are really decent people, not trying to screw any one over or lead them on, just want some honest fun to pass the time. But it can get boring after a while; sometimes they don't know when to shut up and just leave you alone, you really have to send the signal. Which is kind of weird for me, I grew up in a house where negative emotions were reacted to negatively, so I don't always feel OK just kind of lashing out at someone in order to get them to stop, it feels too mean, but its awesome because they are so quick to forgive; they accept very readily that I'm only human, and they are ridiculously loyal and will always let you come crawling back as long as you're not doing anything really fucked up. In this sense they are really tolerant; don't take that as a generalization though. Some of them can be really super critical and judgmental of people they haven't met, which is OK sometimes because I judge people by appearances too, but ultimately I give everyone a chance to prove themselves; LSIs will just totally leave some people out in the cold if they don't approve of them, and actually tend to not open up at all to most people because they have probably been chided for their awkward or talkative behavior, which is really sad because it's so obvious that they are just trying to connect. I feel a lot of bittersweetness from almost all of the LSIs I've gotten to know personally; it's like there is this perpetual struggle to reach out to people in some way that they don't really know how to get a handle on, so they just kind of throw themselves out there, and I'm sure they get hurt a lot when they find someone they like or think is cool and they make themselves open in their awkwardly boisterous way, and just get shot down or have weird looks thrown at them.
Umm, back on topic, they can be kind of anal, but that's kind of OK too because they are willing to do it themselves; contrast to some EIEs, who want everything to be perfect, but want to play little dictator and tell everyone else how it should be while they do less of the work, or just straight up chill on their heels and watch everyone else run in circles trying to satisfy them. I call it "chair in the air syndrome:" just sitting there hovering above the fray with the smirk of slight disapproval...
I dunno, all of the bad things I know about LSIs I've met is largely excusable or understandable from my POV.
As far as IEIs go, well first off they can be some obsessive, petulant motherfuckers. When they get something in their heads, that's the way it is, and that's the way it stays; it's really futile trying to convince an IEI of anything unless you really tear the issue wide the fuck open, because they have this like strange mental shield of certainty that can be so fucking intimidating sometimes, even when they are wrong, because there is this really, truly deep-seated attitude of presumed superiority of judgement. I can understand where this comes from, because some of them are ridiculously insightful sons of bitches, and they understand things that are not simple for them to explain or for others to grasp, simply because they can't be in the IEIs shoes, and so having a lot of this incommunicable knowledge teaches them over time that they can't just listen to what other people say, because others don't always see what they see. So this mental shield of certainty gets built to protect them from crappy input, which is useful a lot of the time, but also can get in the way. However I find that most of the time they are very reasonable if you can state your case in a solid, simple fashion and then just leave them to it. This is something I really appreciate about them: they are always willing to come around in the end when they know they are wrong, as long as you don't push them when they aren't in the mood to be pushed. They are generally really fair-minded, reasonable people, but very temperamental and if you are too pushy, you will get the fangs, and they usually hurt because IEIs hoard interpersonal ammo like the friendship/relationship apocalypse is always on the horizon.
There's another negative: I find that IEIs are often mistrustful, and it's hard to get close to them and tap into their most personal thoughts. They really have to trust you to share what they are really thinking with you, and it's an honor to have an IEI who will be truly real with you; the Fe subs kind of doll it out when situationally appropriate, but if an Ni sub is sharing their deep thoughts with you, rest assured that you are one of the few. They are actually really easy to just meet quickly and have fun with, like if you meet them on a night out at the club and you gel, you can totally form one of those one-night-only crews with Beta introtims, they are probably the best for this kind of thing, along with SEIs and SLEs. But to really know an IEI well and fully gain their trust takes a lot of time and deliberate effort at passing their tests and overcoming their barriers.
Reply With Quote
subtype SLE e7w8 (apart from watching a vids from a possible one on youtube..) but from what you've described ^^, they're very different from the (I'm guessing)..Ti-SLE 8w9/ 6w5's.. that attract & dualize me the most... enneagram and subtype make a whole lot of difference. What subtype are you Octo, out of curiosity?
