Enneagram: 9w1 6w5 2w3 so/sx
“Whether we fall by ambition, blood, or lust, like diamonds we are cut with our own dust.”
Originally Posted by Gilly
To WAA:
RE -
"That's what I was saying too!! We are the ones who can see the beautiful possibilities and opportunities that can come of it!
So, how does one chase an SLI, so as not to scare him away?"
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I think that if you have an intriguing-but-down-to-earth attitude that will be positive--
(ha, ha.... & how can an ENFP *not* be interesting & intriguing???) :-)
SLI's are complex...
they like people that are "real" but they also need something *NEW* --different
SLI's are bored easily --- with humans ---
They want kindness/caring but someone who is strong enough for them (+ silly) :-)
No worries,
you are ENFP! You kick some serious charisma ass!! :-)
TRUE!
True about the SLI boredom, I can see that--this SLI actually was swearing eternal bachelorhood when we first met, saying men aren't cut out to marry and saying how awesome the bachelor life is. Getting to know him more, I feel he doesn't REALLY believe that, but just hasn't met someone who really interested him long-term.
As for ENFp qualities--that's the thing. . .i was REALLLY shy and self-conscious around him in person, so I'm not sure how charismatic i was able to be back then. I can definitely be charismatic and silly among people i feel comfortable with. Right now the only chasing i'm able to do is through email/facebook, and i definitely can try to inject charisma there, but who knows how it would be received.
On the other hand, i thought SLIs dont like people to be tooo showy or emotional.
Enneagram: 9w1 6w5 2w3 so/sx
I would say that they don't like SHALLOW people (rather than showy) and they don't like to be be emotionally *manipulated* or have to endure mental games & pressure being applied in the emotional arena -
(course, neither do I which is why I get along w/ SLI's..especially Te subtype)
ISTPs want to love & trust others. They value emotional honesty (but, yes, they can get drained by too much exposure to emotional expression Fi or Fe).
SLI's really value their long-standing relationships (especially if this can be balanced with a sense of personal autonomy) and can be quite sentimental.
I think that if you are candid with your feelings but not pushy about it... and if you can also give this person personal space...things could work out.
Then again, sometimes an SLI just needs to sow their wild oats in youth.
As an SLI grows older (as with many types) they begin to realize how much they miss relationships with a significant other, with emotional Fi bonding. I think they also tend to get more spiritual with the passing of time (I know quite a few ISTP's who've become drawn to Buddhism, tapping into Ni more)
Work, I hope that helps. I didn't mean to run off on a tangent so much but that's what happens when my Ne is buzzing around with ideas!
I think they are generally reasonable to enough to have a sense of when to stop, but I could see them "chasing" someone for a bit after it's probably best left alone lol but I think this isn't exactly abnormal.
Initially no, eventually yes.
Depends on the degree of wrong and existing trust to positive future with this human, based on known about him. Important is what was done and the context. Important is what a human does later to return the trust.
Also it's important what kind of relations exists. In case of J types - they take more seriously vows of a marriage and may allow more, to try improve what exists with more efforts. Except critical events relating to principles of relations as a sexual cheating in a marriage - in such cases J works as lesser flexible type which breaks with more chance.
Generally, J types may be said as more tolerant as it's harder for them to switch to other people - just avoid critical points. The danger here is to think that if J do not do drama - it's ok to do so further, while J may summarize "wrong" and in one day strictly decide "it's enough".
What went wrong?
I would say ESTj and ISTP confidently approach someone they are interested in
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Dual type (as per tcaudilllg)
Enneagram 5 (wings either 4 or 6)?
I'm constantly looking to align the real with the ideal.I've been more oriented toward being overly idealistic by expecting the real to match the ideal. My thinking side is dominent. The result is that sometimes I can be overly impersonal or self-centered in my approach, not being understanding of others in the process and simply thinking "you should do this" or "everyone should follor this rule"..."regardless of how they feel or where they're coming from"which just isn't a good attitude to have. It is a way, though, to give oneself an artificial sense of self-justification. LSE
Best description of functions:
http://socionicsstudy.blogspot.com/2...functions.html