Harmonization of Relations in Delta Duality Pairs by Meged

**UDP** · 08-13-2007, 04:23 AM

http://the16types.info/forums/viewtopic.php?t=10827

What do you think?

DIAD: THE MANAGING DIRECTOR - THE HUMANIST

THE MANAGING DIRECTOR

Externally severe and efficient, this sotsiotip combines propensity to two contrast enough kinds of love: Pragma and Eros: the ice and a flame, sober calculation and a passionate inclination do by its internally inconsistent person. It prefers to live reason and does not go on an occasion at the feelings. Interests of business at it often prevail of feelings and even above pleasure from dialogue with the favourite person. However periodically it suits the present holidays for the sensations.

It is the careful and reliable partner. It uses the best efforts for the one whom loves. Its partner can lack compliments and verbal expression of feelings, but the Managing director proves the love in practice, taking up the lion's share of all cares, and happens is quite satisfied, if its partner takes part in a common cause and carries out the problems demanding only attention and patience.

The partner - the assistant who will not impose to it the will, methods is necessary to it or to dictate the conditions. The managing director could seem absolutely dry, imperous and exacting person if it was not softened somewhat with presence of sensual love - Eros. Propensity to such kind of emotional behaviour does it at times romantic and magnanimous in relation to object of the feelings.

It is capable to be to the true elect if that suits it as the sexual partner or if it values such partner in life for practical reasons. Its feelings can long burn and brightly though the healthy pragmatism is not alien to them. At absence of reciprocity, it is capable, being guided by feeling of a duty to refuse new hobby. Pragme it subordinates frequently and the erotic feelings though can recollect still long time former love.

THE HUMANIST

The combination dimplomatic Storge and inventive Filia does by its ideal partner in life for the Managing director who is hard enough partner. On the one hand, the Humanist allows it to be the head of the family, and with another - demands from the partner of mutual understanding and respect for the interests. It watches, that they with Operating did not have a difference in outlook, in a line of conduct in relation to associates, in education of children, in plans for the future and in everyday affairs.

In the union with Storge - true family love, such display of love Filia cements the union with quick-tempered, proud and imperous Managing director even more. The humanist as anybody another is able to find the approach to the dualu. It can constrain itself(himself) in dispute and not tell in a temper superfluous.

The humanist shows the claims in such form, that it becomes a shame to the partner with the incorrect behaviour and sharp statements. Finding-out of attitudes thus terminates not in quarrel, and reconciliation or the promise to reconsider the behaviour.

The patience and step, care and diplomacy are inherent in the humanist, but it is artless with those whom loves and prefers to speak the truth or to be silent. Its love Storge aspires to the happy harmonious home life full of kindness and mutual concessions. But only not unilateral! The humanist - not sacrificial sotsiotip. And if allows to supervise over itself in practical questions because of the weak fitness to difficulties, absence of penetrative qualities and confidence of it does not mean, that it will allow the satellite to pass a side separating the careful friend from the heartless dictator.

The humanist spends many sincere forces for re-education of the satellite and approaches it in due course to the ideal. If the partner does not wish to go on compromises, does not give in on its arrangements, it can terminate this union. The managing director is adjusted on creation of strong family: having felt such threat, it can make everything to adjust attitudes.

The spiritual party of love for the Humanist means much more, than erotic, besides it is timid and consequently requires the initiative partner which actively shows the desires. In love the Humanist is constrained, mistrustful, observant. The slightest deviation in behaviour of the partner perceives painfully and uses the best efforts to keep reciprocity in feelings. Even if for the sake of it it is necessary to show insult and alienation. Repented duala the Humanist forgives and tries to remind of the reason of their disagreements never.

The managing director does not bear discussion of personal questions and, especially, finding-out of attitudes. Because of it it is inclined to do hasty conclusions and often to make ethical misses which complicate its attitudes with associates. Absence of patience and endurance does it at times sharp and tactless, it does not have not enough not only diplomacy, but also self-criticism. Therefore the patience and persistence of the Humanist with which that tactfully and consistently re-educates restive duala is necessary for it. The humanist acts not only in a role of the tutor, it constantly influences conscience of the Managing director which is sensitive enough and is not alien high moral principles.

DIAD: THE INSPIRER - THE MASTER

THE INSPIRER

As well as the Humanist, has a combination of kinds of love Filia and Storge.

But Filia here prevails and defines propensity of the Inspirer to harmonious Love only in the event that it feels full spiritual affinity with the partner. Unlike the Humanist, it is the passionate, gusty, violent person in the emotions. As etik and the extrovert, it shows the big interest to new people. Therefore its partner needs to be competitive enough for a long time to keep attention of such not ordinary and restless partner in life.

The inspirer - big romantik also can long stay in a captivity of the illusions. It is capable to idealize the love and its object so is strong, that can long store in a shower fidelity to the ideal, at all not having any hopes for reciprocity. However, it will not sit, slozha hands. It will win reason, soul and if it is necessary also the body of the person which is for it supervalue, and will do it until will achieve reciprocity. Having disappointed in the ideal, it deeply and strongly experiences.

It at times does not have common sense, it is capable to make precipitate acts and to go on an occasion at the feelings. At the same time, because of presence in its emotional behaviour of a component of love Storge, it tries to spare the relatives and to not cause complications in their life. It is so got empathy that can offer for the sake of the blessing of others own interests.

The inspirer is poorly adapted for a life and very much requires care, attention, keenness, protection and support of more realistic, practical and quick person in everyday problems. But it does not bear, when it roughly operate, something to it impose, force it to suffer. It instinctively keeps away from the partner causing to it of suffering.

It is not capable to be jealous and compete to possible contenders long. It not begins to impose and achieve itself(himself) reciprocity if feels, that it neglect. Because of propensity to love Filia it aspires to equality in all and if someone for it means much also it should be out of competition for the elect. Development other party of its attitudes - Storge otherwise will not receive.

It is adjusted on sincere attitudes and hard transfers a deceit in any form, therefore its satellite should be true and truthful. For the Inspirer, as well as for the Humanist, the spiritual party of love is very important, but it gives also great value to erotic attitudes. Absence of the initiative from the partner, forces to doubt of completeness of its feelings.

The inspirer is capable to transform love into a poem, to make its sense of the life, but it can unexpectedly be disappointed in the satellite, not having met full reciprocity or if that does not meet its high ethical requirements. It does by its unpredictable partner.

THE MASTER

The master uniting extreme measures - kinds of love Eros and Pragma - as anybody another is capable to give the partner everything, that is necessary for family happiness. From erotic pleasure, ability to a long sensual and spiritual inclination - up to stability and reliability in the private life full of touching care, attention and mutual aid in all. Unlike the Managing director, it has less than pragmatism and more aspiration to harmonious attitudes with the partner.

The master very much cares of sincere comfort of close people. It is usually constant in the attachments, it is constrained in acts and statements. Very much experiences, if someone will involuntarily offend. However, it not always is capable to recognize the fault at once. Conservatism of love Pragma does by its difficult enough partner, but it willingly goes towards to the favourite person and aspires to restore the lost harmony if sees, that this desire is mutual. Love Eros forces it in many respects to forgive to the elect, but other feeling - Pragma watches that these sins were not beyond admissible.

It is very constrained in display of feelings, but under a mask of coldness greater sensuality disappears. The master is adjusted on strong and harmonious attitudes what only can give two forms of attitudes most suitable for it - Storge and Pragma. It also is ready to divide interests of the partner and to reach with it necessary spiritual affinity for full harmony in mutual relations, which for this dual pair - the main value in a life. Both of the partner to it actively aspire.

Trying in all to be such what it would love and respected, the exacting Master to itself aspires to personal growth and development. That it becomes competitive enough to sustain constant comparisons with others. Besides the master loves passionately and sincerely, the truth, not for extraneous eyes. It is able to waken sensuality of the Inspirer often doubting the desires and badly realizing them.

The inspirer at times seems to it the whimsical child, to bring up which with constant condescension and love - it is a pleasure. The master does not like imperous and self-assured people, their activity - even in a sensuality - suppresses it and does not leave a place for own creativity. This realist too soberly looking for a life, is imposed by optimism of the eternal child-inspirer, helping to avoid the grief and despondency.

**UDP** · 08-13-2007, 04:30 AM

What if each type goes over their respective profile and kind of smooths it out? There are some things in the INFj profile that I am unsure about, so if an INFj is up for it, I would not mind someone going over that - in their own words, kind of. I may go over ESTj soon.

**meatburger** · 08-13-2007, 07:16 AM

hmm im not sure i have enough experience with my own feelings in relationships to know so i will leave it to someone else. I liked some parts of it though.

As well as the Humanist, the inspirer has a combination of kinds of love Filia and Storge

That is true. I probably have around 75% Storge and only a sprinkle of Filia.

The inspirer is poorly adapted for a life and very much requires care, attention, keenness, protection and support of more realistic, practical and quick person in everyday problems. But it does not bear, when it roughly operate, something to it impose, force it to suffer. It instinctively keeps away from the partner causing to it of suffering

Poorly adapted to life. How excellent. Makes me feel like a mistake of evolution

. Sadly there is a lot of truth to this. I seem to find everything very overwhelming a lot of the time.

It is capable to idealize the love and its object so is strong, that can long store in a shower fidelity to the ideal, at all not having any hopes for reciprocity. However, it will not sit, slozha hands. It will win reason, soul and if it is necessary also the body of the person which is for it supervalue, and will do it until will achieve reciprocity.

I didn't quite get this bit. Definately i am capable of remaining faithful to my partner i agree with that. It says "at all not having any hopes for reciprocity". Are they suggesting i dont expect my partner to be faithful? I actually hypothesise that i could break out of any length and any degree of love because of infidelity. I would much rather punish someone for breaking my trust and enduring pain myself than forgiving it and moving on. I like the word supervalue though. That's great

This realist too soberly looking for a life, is imposed by optimism of the eternal child-inspirer, helping to avoid the grief and despondency.

I feel like im Atreyu from the neverending story being called that. I think it does sum it up well though.

**jewels** · 08-30-2007, 06:35 AM

Originally Posted by meatburger

The inspirer is poorly adapted for a life and very much requires care, attention, keenness, protection and support of more realistic, practical and quick person in everyday problems. But it does not bear, when it roughly operate, something to it impose, force it to suffer. It instinctively keeps away from the partner causing to it of suffering

Poorly adapted to life. How excellent. Makes me feel like a mistake of evolution

. Sadly there is a lot of truth to this. I seem to find everything very overwhelming a lot of the time.

I found this to be hilarious...the mistake of evolution part, lol. I don't think we're poorly adapted to life, but to dull, dry, pointless routine. The exciting, amazing, inspiring parts of life we're perfectly suited for :wink:

**Danielle** · 08-30-2007, 08:32 AM

This is kind of hard to read, so I admit I only read the Humanist part, didn't read any of the others, including the LSE part just yet. But from what I could understand, it rather sounds like the kind of relationship I've never even really considered having. I mean that in a good way. Many aspects are so ideal, I don't even consciously dream of it. It seems like it might be me at my best self, yet in a relationship.

On the one hand, the Humanist allows it to be the head of the family, and with another - demands from the partner of mutual understanding and respect for the interests. It watches, that they with Operating did not have a difference in outlook, in a line of conduct in relation to associates, in education of children, in plans for the future and in everyday affairs.

This is important, and it's one reason that I didn't think the LSE could be my dual, because I'd been misled by MBTI descriptions of the type, and by the outward behaviors of LSEs that I have observed from afar. It's very important to me that I be understood and accepted for who I am, in any relationship. We don't have to agree on most things, although I have come to learn that if there's no agreement on certain big things, then the divide cannot be crossed. As one of my favorite talk show hosts says, "I ask for clarity, not agreement". So if at first we don't agree on something, then I can't be friends with or marry someone who won't listen as I explain my position. I've had too many friends that just couldn't do even that much, and I've had no luck with romantic relationships in that regard. I can never understand why people won't at least hear me out and really make an effort to understand where I'm coming from. If you love and respect me, shouldn't you always do that? But too often, emotions and value judgments get in the way. This doesn't happen so much with LSEs.

And as for the big things, yeah, we do need to have the same outlook. That's because I envision a marriage as two people living the same dream, the same vision. It might be his, it might be mine, but support is paramount. I want to be the kind of wife who supports her husband, because I'm really good at supporting people and rooting for them, and providing the emotional grounding that they need. Just knowing that every day he can come home to someone who believes in him and what he does, I want to be that woman for someone.

he humanist as anybody another is able to find the approach to the dualu. It can constrain itself(himself) in dispute and not tell in a temper superfluous.

The humanist shows the claims in such form, that it becomes a shame to the partner with the incorrect behaviour and sharp statements. Finding-out of attitudes thus terminates not in quarrel, and reconciliation or the promise to reconsider the behaviour.

Nobody knows how to argue with me, and I can't dispute with most people. I'm serious. Usually I bite my tongue, but if I'm not, then it just gets pointlessly heated and angry. I hate that so much. If I don't like something a loved one is doing or saying, I feel like a lot of times my statements are construed as character assassination. It sounds like the LSE might actually be prone to listening to what I say on its own merits, and not making it too personal or dredging up crap. Now I admit that I have been guilty of being a bad fighter, but I really feel it's because I've never felt comfortable, like everything would still be okay afterward. I'd love it if I could have a friend/husband/whatever who didn't look at me as some little puppy, not to be respected.

And if allows to supervise over itself in practical questions because of the weak fitness to difficulties, absence of penetrative qualities and confidence of it does not mean, that it will allow the satellite to pass a side separating the careful friend from the heartless dictator.

So I wouldn't allow it, eh? So I don't have to be afraid of that? Because that's my one fear with LSEs. I won't stand for dictatorship. I'd run at the first sight of it. Always friends, always. Not my boss. God, too many people think they're my boss, and I'm too stubborn for that, can't they see?

If the partner does not wish to go on compromises, does not give in on its arrangements, it can terminate this union. The managing director is adjusted on creation of strong family: having felt such threat, it can make everything to adjust attitudes.

Well that sure sounds nice. So the LSE will fight for what we've got, even if that means compromising. Because what we've created (and strong family could also be strong friendship), with our careful love, mutual respect and dedication over the years is WORTH IT. I'll give my life for someone. Not just die for someone, but live for them, for us, for what we are and what we can be. I need someone who feels the same.

The slightest deviation in behaviour of the partner perceives painfully and uses the best efforts to keep reciprocity in feelings.

Sad but true. I have really high ideals, and a real low threshold for rejection. Rejection can come in many forms. So constancy is so important to me.

One last thing. Several times the Humanist is described as "re-educating" the Managing Director. I hadn't thought about myself and my relationships in that regard but it's so true. And it kind of makes me sad, because there's a lot inside of me, a lot I know about people and relationships and the way things are and the way they should be....and it's mostly wasted. I don't even know my own potential, because I'm so alone most of the time.

I guess I understood the description better than I thought.

**leckysupport** · 08-30-2007, 11:22 AM

Originally Posted by meatburger

The inspirer is poorly adapted for a life and very much requires care, attention, keenness, protection and support of more realistic, practical and quick person in everyday problems. But it does not bear, when it roughly operate, something to it impose, force it to suffer. It instinctively keeps away from the partner causing to it of suffering

Poorly adapted to life. How excellent. Makes me feel like a mistake of evolution

. Sadly there is a lot of truth to this. I seem to find everything very overwhelming a lot of the time.

Reminds me of a IEE housemate I had, we couldn't stand each other. But anyway whenever I got her to try and organise something she always said things like 'I don't know what to do..I don't really do things like this..' she was only collecting moeny from other housemates for the bills. But once she started she was pretty good at it, needed a little direction.

That's why I hate these descriptions, they make you think you're not good at things because scientifically you're not supposed to be. Which is complete bollocks.

**meatburger** · 08-30-2007, 01:30 PM

Originally Posted by electric

Reminds me of a IEE housemate I had, we couldn't stand each other. But anyway whenever I got her to try and organise something she always said things like 'I don't know what to do..I don't really do things like this..' she was only collecting moeny from other housemates for the bills. But once she started she was pretty good at it, needed a little direction.

That's why I hate these descriptions, they make you think you're not good at things because scientifically you're not supposed to be. Which is complete bollocks.

Yeah that makes a lot of sense. Its all to do with Self Confidence. I tend to not complain that i cant do something but i always ask lots of questions to clarify what im supposed to do. Needing a little direction is correct. For some things though like in my old workplace and a few other things i have absorbed most of how it all works and i was the go-to problem solver person lol. What i meant moreso is everything just gets on top of me. Like i have to go to the doctors, the dentist get some new shoes, etc etc and i just tend to leave these things forever.

Sad you didn't like her though.

**leckysupport** · 09-01-2007, 04:08 PM

Sad you didn't like her though.

No, it's sad that people are dying in Iraq.

She was too clean and nice in a annoyingly hip yuppie way, plus she reminded me of SM.

Edit: Infact imagine the SM was annoying in a SM way all day plus a annoying hip yuppie trying to save kids with one arm and parkinsons, thinking she's nobel and suggested the best way to clean the kitchen floor was with a tooth brush. She was like that.

**FDG** · 09-01-2007, 05:11 PM

Originally Posted by electric

Originally Posted by meatburger

The inspirer is poorly adapted for a life and very much requires care, attention, keenness, protection and support of more realistic, practical and quick person in everyday problems. But it does not bear, when it roughly operate, something to it impose, force it to suffer. It instinctively keeps away from the partner causing to it of suffering

Poorly adapted to life. How excellent. Makes me feel like a mistake of evolution

. Sadly there is a lot of truth to this. I seem to find everything very overwhelming a lot of the time.

Reminds me of a IEE housemate I had, we couldn't stand each other. But anyway whenever I got her to try and organise something she always said things like 'I don't know what to do..I don't really do things like this..' she was only collecting moeny from other housemates for the bills. But once she started she was pretty good at it, needed a little direction.

That's why I hate these descriptions, they make you think you're not good at things because scientifically you're not supposed to be. Which is complete bollocks.

Well you basically tried to contradict what was written, but in actuality you confirmed it, right? :wink:

**meatburger** · 09-02-2007, 04:02 AM

Originally Posted by FDG

Well you basically tried to contradict what was written, but in actuality you confirmed it, right? :wink:

hehe yeah i noticed that too

ENFp's suck at physical life. Emotional life were not too bad at

**UDP** · 09-02-2007, 05:53 AM

DIAD: THE MANAGING DIRECTOR - THE HUMANIST

THE MANAGING DIRECTOR

Externally severe and efficient, this sotsiotip combines propensity to two contrast enough kinds of love: Pragma and Eros: the ice and a flame, sober calculation and a passionate inclination do by its internally inconsistent person. It prefers to live reason and does not go on an occasion at the feelings. Interests of business at it often prevail of feelings and even above pleasure from dialogue with the favourite person. However periodically it suits the present holidays for the sensations.

There is a conflict when it comes to love for the LSE. In one sense, they are extremely mercenary (particularly in terms of the ethical standards of their chosen partner). They can be aristocratic in terms of the qualities of the people they associate themselves with. And when it comes to personal matters, it is easy for the LSE, who is so focused on production and also providing, to think more about work than its partner - it can put the important of work above a conversation with someone close to it.
And yet, when it is drawn to someone, attracted, and captivated.... the LSE can be extremely passionate in all forms. Erotically, a very intense desire can be created. The LSE is not one to be overtly lovey-dovey, mushy, or emotional towards its partner, however, occasionally it can dedicate 'holiday periods', or just sort of vacations, where it intensely focuses on the partner, and can indulge in various shared pleasures for a time - in contrast to its usual extremely businesslike nature.

It is the careful and reliable partner. It uses the best efforts for the one whom loves. Its partner can lack compliments and verbal expression of feelings, but the Managing director proves the love in practice, taking up the lion's share of all cares, and happens is quite satisfied, if its partner takes part in a common cause and carries out the problems demanding only attention and patience.

The LSE is extremely loyal (consider how it is hardwired to be the dual of the idealistic INFj). It is careful (in erotic role of course), and generally very conscientious of its partner (si creative), it likes to find what its partner enjoys and as such enjoys providing this to its partner. It seeks to give its best effort to the person it is closes to.

"Its partner can lack compliments and verbal expression of feelings," - that sounds like it is talking about the LSE itself, as per the second half of the sentence. Basically, the LSE shows its love by actions, by doing things for its partner. Calling them, making them dinner, opening doors - serve and protect in a general sense. ((this paragraph is confusing for me to read, I am not sure which parts are referring to the LSE or its partner)). The LSE demands attention and time spent with its partner. (remember Gilligan's thread about erotic roles and "paranoid Ni").

The partner - the assistant who will not impose to it the will, methods is necessary to it or to dictate the conditions. The managing director could seem absolutely dry, imperious and exacting person if it was not softened somewhat with presence of sensual love - Eros. Propensity to such kind of emotional behavior does it at times romantic and magnanimous in relation to object of the feelings.

The LSE will not tolerate someone who orders it around. (The INFj makes a great dual in this way, because it does not mind someone who is as administrative and controlling as the LSE). Generally speaking the LSE is extremely mechanical in its relations to people- dry and imperious are good words, imperial as well. The LSE can be extremely strict in terms of how its own life is run, and much the same when it comes to those who get close to it. However, when it is sensually involved and attracted to someone, its extreme severity can soften. When it is actually around someone it loves, it can be very romantic and magnanimous - loving, caring, protective, sensual. It wants to make the relationship beautiful, as it wants to do all things beautifully.

It is capable to be to the true elect if that suits it as the sexual partner or if it values such partner in life for practical reasons. Its feelings can long burn and brightly though the healthy pragmatism is not alien to them. At absence of reciprocity, it is capable, being guided by feeling of a duty to refuse new hobby. Pragme it subordinates frequently and the erotic feelings though can recollect still long time former love.

The LSE is very capable of having a long term relationship. (Consider it is Fi seeking, and its dual is the INFj). If the LSE is extremely attractive to it, and/or if it has a great practical reasonings (like a good person, good ethics, good situation), the LSE can make it for the long haul - but there must be good reasoning for the relationship to exist. ((Speaking for myself: the LSE can particularly be burned into liking someone, and it is possible for them to harbor long intense feelings about someone forever. There is a certain threshold, that, once crossed, is unchangable (Fi) )). If an LSE looses someone, they can remain faithful to them -- if they were really deeply connected. They can hold out their likings if the person they want does not like them right now in hopes that they would change. In one sense (again, remember Gilligan's paranoid Ni comments), they are always looking for that one person they can always be with, and, should they think you are it, they will hold out until you prove yourself to not be it. They are always looking for that one person to be "it".

Sometimes if an LSE was really burned, that feeling can harbor, particularly if they are not attached to someone at the moment. Because the LSE is hardwired for an idealistic relationship (EII dual), their is a subdued yet extremely intense passion to their feelings (Weak F in general, bad with Fe, seeking Fi). This passion will linger, as, the only way an LSE can really have a relationship is if it is one with real passion - the necessity of Eros to be involved in the relationship. The "Fire". The LSE will always have this "Fire", because that is how it goes about relationships - that is part of the relationship to the LSE. And until it has "the person" where it can focus "The Fire" on, it can harbor past experiences of that person.

The LSE always need to be loyal to someone or something, and it will hold such feelings regardless of whether or not such a person is actually in a relationship with the LSE. The LSE ultimately strives for a real relationship with that one person.

Other notes:

LSE likes to be depended on and needed - being the rock, the protector, the guardian, the hero. It likes to be in control, but it also likes to please. A king that reigns magnanimously, that wants to treat its woman like a queen (yeah, gender roles, but you can deal with it). LSEs are traditional and magnanimous.

LSE's can be extremely polite and self sacrificing to people they care about - they will spend extra hours caring or doing things. To people who do not know the LSE or if the LSE has not established its reputation as "a nice guy" in this way, the LSE can seem extremely harsh and businesslike, very distanced and impersonal. Particularly this is how an INFj softens the ESTj, by the ESTj seeing someone who needs its care. Other people will see the ESTj caring for the INFj, and the INFj will give the ESTj good advice and appreciate this care, drawing more compassion out of the otherwise pragmatic and severe ESTj.

More later.

**eunice** · 09-02-2007, 06:35 AM

Originally Posted by UDP