Type my relative - ENFj or ESFj?
This is an older relative of mind, and I am certain of two things: rational, anddominant. This is related to my type as well somewhat, in that I get along with this person well and understand its psychological field fairly well.
- At present: ENFj > ESFj, because she seems to prefer a beta sort of atmosphere.
[list:3014b08891]She is elder now. She enjoys playing card games and board games with family members, and proclaims herself to be a "sore loser", and very competitive - which belies her otherwise kind nature. She says she would much rather play against someone who is trying to win - and lose - than just play someone who is not playing for the win, or who will let her win just to let her be happy about it. Also, in support of Beta, she is not at all hesitant to bring up problems concerning the family or discuss things openly. (I enjoy this a great deal). This differs from a few ESFjs I know, who seem to avoid all troublesome talk if possible.
[*]General information (order irrelevant)
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- Very emotional.
Ethically judgmental, but at the same time makes reasonable conclusions. Believes in treating all people with respect. She has commented on and appreciated good character in other people. Is not afraid to get angry (though not too often this occurs), and believes it is much better to air out your feelings now and get them out in the open. Has explained that sometimes she would get upset about something, or even someone in the family, and be mad at them, but ultimately she cares about the person despite such an outburst.
Believes greatly in marriage vows.
At one point opened and ran her own antique shop. Enjoys odd curiosities as such, and mixing and mingling with the people, and trying to find good buys and making good deals. A reader of many books and biographies. Listens to a program called "Coast to Coast" with Art Bell...
http://www.answers.com/main/ntquery?...oast%22&gwp=16Coast to Coast AM is the #1 late-night syndicated radio talk show in the United States which deals with a variety of topics, but most frequently ones that relate either to the paranormal, or to alleged conspiracies. It was created by Art Bell, airs seven nights a week 10:00 p.m. to 2:00 a.m. Pacific Time, and is distributed by Premiere Radio Networks. It is currently hosted by George Noory weekdays and Art Bell on the weekends.
...yet openly admits that some of the talk is purely foolish. Believes that some true things are interwoven in the program despite some questionable things. Despite the disapproval of some other people in family, she continues to follow her interest and pursue her curiosities.
Believes in reincarnation, and somewhat struggled for a time with conventional religion (in her case, orthodox Christianity), because one of her sons was born disabled with a very rare disease. She still tends to this son and tries her best to treat all her children equally, believes each one brings something special to life. She has been married to the same man for over 50 years - he is likely an IJ, and shows great. She recently noted the consistency in something like her husband's handwriting - she says it was the same way since forever.
She sometimes gets bogged down in depressing thoughts, depending on how her family is doing. For example, she has expressed to me that she used to think she would be able to die happy, but last year, her one of her daughters got divorced, and one of her sons entered into a troublesome marriage, so the ensuing drama was difficult for her nerves. She is a worrier. Consequently, she always appreciates good news from people. Only recently have I become aware of this, but I have found that leaving our visits with some positive news seems to have good affects on her. Especially if she has been talking about things that worry her for some time, if I bring up something positive, she will say "Oh, thank you UDP, hearing that good news really made my day!".
She does have a good sense of decoration in her home, and that is one thing that made me question ESFj / ENFj... but come to think of it, it is not in a bright and cheery Si sort of way. It is just fairly well coordinated. Has many trees and plants, flowers in her backyard.
In family gatherings, she is usually one of the most social people, the most talkative. ! Ah yes, this may be another victim indication: she was another person in my family who thought I did not like her or her kin because I was so shy and reclusive in my early years. She is social, but she waits for the initiative of other people it seems, which makes me think ENFj > ESFj. At her older age, she does not enjoy leaving her house much, and prefers people to come and visit her. She is very wary about where she feels welcomed, and as above, seems to prefer people initiating such. Will make suggestions and imply things, but waits for other people to make the action, which I believe is victim behavior(?).
If I can think of more things that would be useful, they will be added. Ask questions and they may be answered.
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Originally Posted by Filatova: EIE - work and home
